i took the enneagram again, and i knew i was right.

Threes

The Three's attention goes to setting goals and hitting their targets, to success and creating the "right" image in the eyes of others, and to doing rather than being. Type Three is the prototype of being identified with a persona. Thus, they often mistakenly believe that they are their façade. Although all the types do this to some degree, Type Three's character is formed around this mistaken identification with a desired image. ^[30][31] The defensive coping strategy driving the Three is based on an early experience of being valued for what they did, not who they were. ^[32] They perform and achieve in order to earn the approval and respect of others. Being preoccupied with doing, Threes can often be unaware of the fact that they numb themselves to their own emotions, because feelings can get in the way of doing and achieving. . ^[33][32] Major traits include an excessive focus on work and tasks, concern with image and the approval of others, and a competitive striving for status and recognition. ^[31] Strengths: Threes can be industrious, energetic, and attractive. ^[34] Challenges: They can be workaholics, unaware of their real feelings, and unable to slow down and simply be. ^[35]

Ego fixation: vanity

Holy idea: hope

Passion/Vice: deceit

Virtue: truthfulness^[36]

*from wikipedia

TYPE THREE: THE PERFORMER Threes need the attention of others: they need to be recognized and even admired by others. Their own personal value comes not so much from how they view themselves as from the prestige and status that other people assign to them. They are compelled to avoid failure. Success is more important to Threes than just about anything else in their lives, and so they tend to invest themselves totally in their work. They often sacrifice themselves to their jobs and careers and expect the same of others. They are good at rallying people because of their dedication to success, which they define in terms of achieving a goal or realizing a vision. They do not get bogged down in details. Although usually cooperative, they typically have difficulty forming intimate relationships and they are frequently uncomfortable with their own feelings. Possible origins. Threes were the children who were prized for their achievements. They remember coming home from school and being asked about how well they had done, rather than how they felt about their day. Performance and image were rewarded, rather than emotional connections or a deep involvement in other people's lives. They eventually learned that the way to approval and love was successful performance, so they became adept at self-promotion and at projecting an image that incorporated the ideal characteristics of a role. Flawed Threes are competitive to a fault. They possess an overwhelming need to be Number One. They can become tough, unrelenting taskmasters. They will be long on making demands and short on offering support as other people try to meet those demands. They often lose friends in their competitive frenzy and are unable to enjoy success once they have achieved it. They are also unduly concerned with impressing their superiors and tend to flaunt any favored standing they achieve. Because they use exploitative tactics to get what they want, their greatest fear-the fear of rejection--is often realized. Well-adapted Threes are able to get beyond the need for an external affirmation of their worth and to come to a personal acceptance of themselves including their limitations. They no longer need the applause of an audience and they learn to find gratification in committing themselves to someone or something outside themselves. Healthy Threes are self-assured, have good social instincts and good relations with higher-ups, and an ambition to improve. Their natural enthusiasm and their ability to serve as role models make them excellent team players. Well-balanced Threes have transcended their self-focused tendencies and their single-minded preoccupation with their projects The healthy Threes learn to form close relationships for their own sake They also overcome any tendency to take credit not due them and to withhold credit due others In accepting their own fundamental worth as persons, they no longer are so susceptible to envying the accomplishments of others. Occupations. Attractive environments include small businesses that have been built up through effort and long hours Jobs that require the consolidation of known ideas into workable systems -- packaging, promotion, marketing and sales As managers they specialize in building organizations, in turning their organizations into objects worthy of respect and high praise They gravitate toward environments where they can excel and avoid those where they cannot achieve. Finding Oneself. Threes will probably agree with most of the following statements: I like to keep myself on the go. I identify with achievement and performance. Being able to get things organized and accomplished just seems to come natural to me. "Success" is a word that means a lot to me. I like to have clear goals set and to know where I stand on the way toward those goals. I firmly believe that status and respect must be earned. Projecting a successful image is very important to me. Making decisions are not a problem for me. I usually do not stop working long enough to ask myself how I feel about what I am doing. I'll be happy after the next promotion.

*from personality online

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