Take The Leap

On Relationship Advice

2011-05-01T06:32:00.001-07:00

During the past three days, I have been talking to some close friends about their relationship problems. And as usual, I always share my own take on the issues that they face, as well as help them in processing what they experience. In the end, I let them know what they really feel towards a person, what to do, or what to consider before doing anything.

Giving relationship advice or just listening to the stories of others isn't something new to me. I have been doing that since high school, and I for the past eight or so years, I have listened to a lot of stories. Some were happy, some were sad. Some were simply magical, while some were tragic. Some grow, some die out. And finally, some decide to continue, while others would say that things have to be over in order to grow.

And looking back, the whole experience struck me. I'm surprised to find out that I have talked to a lot of people. I have listened to a lot of stories about love, and I have given my side to them. I'm not sure if the things were really right or really helpful, but I believe that most of them makes sense and would really help a person with his or her struggle in relationships.

But believe it or not, I am just one of those who read and think about love. Sure, I've read all those Joshua Harris books that had all the Christian love stuff discussed (though there are things there I do not subscribe to), I have read and interpreted M. Scott Peck's "Love Defined" over and over again. I have read and written about philosophers and their philosophies that talked about love. I have watched, over and over again, (500) Days of Summer and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind. But only a little of them proved to be really helpful in real life.

I couldn't even tell a story about myself, because the chapters in my life that I had a few love stories of my own were lame and awkward. Looking back at all of those, I don't even think that there's anything, in its strict definition, real happened. Nothing of those ever became real relationships, with any full commitment involved. All of them were superficial, but involved a play of emotions and decisions.

Perhaps the only thing that I have to hold on in coming up with these pieces of advice would be the stories I hear from other people. It's their own struggles to let people in their lives that made me think about love. It's their happy and sad points in life that helped me see what it feels like to love and be in love. But then, these can only provide very little to help me.

And then I realized that there was something I'm forgetting. I forgot that love is analogous, that whatever kind of love you experience, there is always something that's partly similar in all of these, and yet there are things that set each experience of love apart. Perhaps, I tell myself, what makes me think about love, speak about love, and help others about love, is that I myself have experienced love, albeit in a different manner. My idea of love might not be in committed relationships, but it's in my family, in my friends, in my friends' loves, in my vocation, and of course, my personal love stories.

Those ideas of love where in the consolations, the desolations, the joys, the sorrows, the pleasantries, the pains, the happiness, the sadness, and in the glory of love working in my everyday life, whether it is something I experience, my friends experience, or in the simple movies, quotes, posters, books, and essays that just strike me. It is in all things superficial and profound. It is everywhere, and what I just did is to listen to it, give meaning to it, and pass my own thoughts to others.

In the end, those things that I have given to others were those that have been already given to me. It is not something out of my own in itself. Rather, it is all of those insights on love brought together and re-delivered to fit the needs of those who would want to listen. It is not a one-way process either, for in talking about love, I also receive insights. I also become invited to think about the things I have said and what the others I have said. In the end, it becomes the exchange of discourses on love that brings out insight and wisdom.

So even though I know I'm not the best in doing all of those, I would continue. Despite not being an expert, I know I could say something, and I will continue to speak, because it is only then that I let others know what I have learned and talked about, and it is only then that I really learn about love.

And in the end, I just hope that I will be presiding over the marriage of those whom I have talked to. And I'll really be happy for them like I also love and am loved .

For A Friend

2011-04-15T17:49:00.000-07:00

You can deal with this in two things, and let me explain in my own terms and in my own experience.

The first one, take the long, slow, but steady road. You can play the game of sensing, and then when the right time comes, say it out. I'd say it is effective because it gave me time to know someone and assess what I really feel. But the problem is, it takes time. And patience. And lots of effort… and "competition" among other things.

The second one, would be the gamble. It's just going instant, not expecting anything but letting it all out, saying it right there and then. And there are two endings to this one, and it can either be comic or tragic. But hey, at least you let it all out, there's nothing bothering you.

There are two options. Which one will you take?

Redefinition

2011-04-03T00:04:00.000-07:00

A short creative evaluation of the first year of regency.

By the time I took off my Ateneo toga and shipped my things out of the seminary, I had this one dream in this long break that I am going to take before heeding the call to priesthood. “Change the world,” I said to myself. With all the idealism and the youthful energy that I had, I had just had this one goal, and part of it would be to make an impact on wherever I go, to become someone who can give something I can to the world.

Perhaps, I thought, it could all start by trying something I did not envision myself to be. I applied as a High School Christian Life Education teacher in Xavier School, and tried to discover another side of my own self. Also, figuring out that I will try this for a year, I have this feeling that I will be able to see another side of the world.

And seeing a lot I did. This first year of regency became a period for me to adjust, getting out of the closed world of the seminary and finding myself outside this world that is full of surprises to those who search for it. I experienced a lot of things, both simple and complicated, that I was not able to experience before. Besides the “usual” job as a teacher – preparing for lessons, checking requirements, I have to juggle with other things, such as house bills, family matters, and other personal stuff that needs to be attended to. More than that, I was also confronted with various issues regarding my relationships with other people. I experienced relationships where feelings come into play, and the idea of commitments and choosing become real questions that need to be confronted (not that I am in a relationship right now, just to be clear).

In this one year, I felt that the whole of my being was stretched apart. I was led towards experiencing new things and seeing the world from a different point-of-view, in a different situation. I was able to have a wider perspective on things, and I realized that there are greater demands that have to be fulfilled and responded to.
But then, all was certainly not like heaven in my life outside during my first year. There are a lot of problems to be overcome due to adjustments, as well as questions and self-doubts that need to be confronted and answered. At many points in this first year, I tried to deal with who I am, my attitudes, my perspectives in life, as well as the things I love to do. One of the things I largely dealt with and struggled with is my work. As a teacher, I was able to discover my tendencies, interests, and attitudes towards my work as well as with other people. My job somehow challenged me into becoming someone greater than who I am.

And in the end of it all, I have realized that, despite this short stint as a high school teacher, I have learned a lot. I have seen things about me that were different, some of them praiseworthy, while some need to be focused and improved upon. I have gained new insights and lessons about life, most particularly about the difficulty of living it as well as the wisdom in its ordinariness.

But the most important lesson that I have learned in this first year is the reawakening of the sense of wonder and fascination over life. Living in a different setting, in a different situation, fully opened my eyes to new things and possibilities that I haven’t thought about in eight years. It opened me to options, to avenues for exercising freedom and responsibility, for choosing what should be done and could be done. In the end, it opened me to the exercise of freedom, a freedom to trudge my own path according to how it should be, and a freedom to forge who I am and redefine myself.

I felt bad that I would have to leave the first place that taught me this, and I am more compelled to go what I believe is a greater good for me. I might not have stayed longer like the others, but I believe that one year has been valuable and worth it, and not a moment is wasted.

Unfortunately, I would have to continue my journey and search for greater things. I have to leave things aside (all the while remembering the people that have been significant) and go towards a new destination, a new stop. This first year of my regency nudged me and told me that there are still a lot of things to discover in this world, a lot of things and people to love and cherish, as well as work for in a span of days, weeks, and even months.

And ultimately, this first year has been a redefinition, a moment to once again shape the self and ask the most important questions in life. And because of this one year of asking myself, I know I have grown, and I’m sure that when I make the decision to return to the seminary a few years from now, the Earl that left the seminary for regency will not be the Earl that will return. The latter, I believe, will be someone better, wiser, and more prepared to heed the call.

On Vulnerability

2011-03-26T09:20:00.000-07:00

For most of nature, self-preservation is the name of the game.

It is true that all organisms in the natural world would seek to preserve life and well-being over everything else. In fact, this is the underlying principle of evolution, stipulated by Darwin's "survival of the fittest." Any creature will do anything - a reaction, a defense mechanism, or an act of escape, just to avoid any impending threat or harm, and be able to survive and live its life the way it should be.

This has been the principle by which everything lives, until man existed. It is out of his freedom and reason that, tracing the lines made by Pierre Teilhard de Chardin, learns to go out his own instincts and chose to share himself rather than curl himself up, and ironically, he gains something from it, he grows in it, and becomes fulfilled in it. In giving up his desire for self-preservation, he gains life.

This irony in the human existence is well-manifested (in fact, is being shown how it is developed), in love. It is in love where one experiences the desire for self-preservation, but in the end, it leads to losing oneself, the willingness to become vulnerable in order to be united.

The invitation to love starts with an attraction, a strong drive to approach the other and form a relationship with that person. By its nature, attraction is primarily directed to the self. Most would say that attraction is based upon the primordial desire to propagate the species, but it's just one aspects. What is most salient in attraction is the fact that one desires for self-affirmation. I am attracted to that person because I feel that with whatever that I like about her makes me feel better. It makes me avoid the harm brought by loneliness and misery of being alone and having no one to be with. At this point, attraction indicates that a person needs someone in order to feel comfortable with himself and this world that he is placed in.

To secure this someone, the lover has to put his best foot forward to the beloved. He will be forced to bring out the best in him and appear as someone impressive and attractive for the beloved. This behavior moves in an outward direction, intended for the other, but still moves toward the self, as this is fueled by self-interest, which is, again, the desire to possess someone and get rid of the fear of isolation and loneliness.

Let's assume that this will work, and the lover is able to know and eventually become attracted to the beloved more than before. When it comes to the point that one has to make the work of true love happen, things take a drastic turn.

At this point, genuine care and concern plays its role, the direction would go as it should be - outward. When the lover begins to give his life to the beloved, then the principle of self-preservation is broken, because the lover will show and share all of himself to the beloved. Instead of establishing a form of defense mechanism that will prevent him from harm, he will completely reveal himself to her, from his strengths to his very weaknesses. The lover's being becomes vulnerable, susceptible to harm and pain that could be brought by the experience of sharing himself to the beloved.

In his experience of loving, the lover expresses, "This is all of me, in my totality. This is not just the best foot forward, but also the worst one behind as well. This is not just my strength, but also the weaknesses that I have. This is not just my confidence, but also my fears and apprehensions. This is not just the things that I am certain about you and me, but also the uncertainties that may face us." In loving, the lover presents himself totally, without any reservations. He reveals himself, and thus, he is susceptible to harm. In loving, he becomes vulnerable, open towards receiving every bit of pain and suffering that could be brought about in the process of sharing his life with the beloved.

And yet despite the pain, the lover remains. He does not fold and resort to any mode of protection that might hinder him from receiving the beloved, because he finds meaning in it. He finds hope in it. He hopes that after the pain has subsided and all the trials have been overcome, he remains. However, he is not alone in his remaining, for he is united with the beloved, and he finds his fulfillment in that unity. Although he is not assured that suffering and hurt will cease, he hopes that he faces this together with the beloved.

All through out his journey, he seeks to preserve himself, but in the end, the irony is there, where in his search for meaning, he loses himself and makes himself open for someone to be with him and share with him his life.

And at the end of this all, as he continues of the journey, he hopes.

Passed Over In Silence

2011-02-13T05:22:00.000-08:00

Sometimes we let affection,
go unspoken,
Sometimes we let our love
go unexpressed,
Sometimes we can't find words to tell
our feelings,
Especially towards those
we love the best.

I love you.

These three words seem so small, and yet it carries everything. It is not just a mere expression that can be said haphazardly. Rather, it is something larger than what people think it is. In saying these words, the lover throws himself to the beloved, hoping that he be accepted inasmuch as he is willing to accept her. These words carry not only a moment, but a huge part of one's life, which ranges from several fragmented moments of existence, up to even a whole lifetime. These three words either make or break, prove or disprove, flourish or fade. These three words can turn the direction of life and change the whole course of existence, giving it greater meaning and significance.

The moment we speak these words is a moment of committing. It is a sign of self-giving that makes everything explicit, bringing everything that is within out of the self and offering it to the other to take.

But then, what if it wasn't said? What if everything is there, the feelings, the willingness and effort towards self-giving, the connection, the relationship that could grow, except that no one could get it out and say it out loud?

The many complications of relationships today show us the rift between words and actions. There are those that continue to flourish, yet days go by without the presence of those three words. There are even those who cannot completely say it, or just half-heartedly whisper it to themselves, because doing such would put everything on the line.

In these moments, could the actions be enough to justify the presence of love? Or do they have to be spoken in order to make its presence evident?

And perhaps, the biggest question: do we really need saying it? Or could it be just passed over in silent, wordless expressions and significations?

Words and Love

Just what exactly is the significance of words and spoken expressions in human existence and experience? Are they really necessary in expressing what we mean and what we feel?

Our life tells us that words are the only means towards direct communication, of explicitly, for lack of a better word, saying what we mean. They make obvious what is intended, and bring what is inside out in the open. It is meant to be said because it wants to be received, to be interpreted, and to be accepted. Words are the most direct and explicit form of human communication, such that one could not fully express what one would want to.

Words are such because they not only point to meaning, but more than that, they carry meaning themselves. Words have particular, significant meanings inevitable and necessarily attached to them, and these meanings come in various contexts, from various speakers, and spoken alongside various emotions and feelings. One could not even say that we can speak a word that is devoid of context, that is "pure meaning" in itself, for it carries the way the speaker understands that which the words point to and carry.

If that is the case, words carry more than plain meanings. It carries with it the context, the intention, and the signification of the speaker. When we speak of something, we do not just point. Rather, we carry with us the way we perceive and understand things, the way we feel about what we talk about. And to put it in the larger context of human communication, we can say that we carry something within us, and more than that, we carry ourselves when we put things in words.

Such is the importance of words that things have to be said in order to be understood and, in the process, understand as well. Thus, it goes to say that it is in words that love is fully and explicitly expressed.

And when we wholeheartedly say, "I love you," we carry more than the meaning of these words.

To say these three words is to show that all the moments spent and all the emotions poured over the other actually mean something, and because for the lover it has meaning, it is through words that he wants the other to know that everything is meaningful. In the moment of saying these words, past experience is relieved in the present, which projects all of these in the future, These words withstand time, for in every moment it is said, everything collapses and is brought together in that single moment of saying it.

Also, to say these words is to express hope. It is a way of showing that despite everything that happened and will happen, all of these mean something, and all of it is worth fighting for. These words show that the lover and the beloved would withstand all obstacles just to be with and to grow with each other.

As a whole, these three words bring everything together and make sense of everything, giving meaning to all the fragments of a relationship and bringing all of them together into that very single moment. It contains all the things that could be expressed about the relationship, all that could be said of the self, the other, and the connection that exists between. It brings together all the possible ways of showing love, wrapping it all up and presenting it to the other as gift, inasmuch as he presents himself as a gift to the beloved, the way the beloved presents herself as a gift to the lover.

These three words show that there is indeed more than all the possible expressions of love left unsaid. They signify the willingness to commit to be together, to share their whole selves to each other. To actually exist as one.

Saying What Is Unsaid

It doesn't mean that when it is unspoken, it is not love already. In such relationships, intimacy is still expressed and not taken aback, albeit silent. There is still a degree of mutual recognition, treating each other as significant and special. Whatever the lovers have done and gone through can still point to love.

But it is a love that lacks maturity and fullness. It is still in a stage where it still cannot be fully and freely expressed. This unspoken kind of love is still fragmented, floating in those separate moments, with nothing holding them together. It is a love that still depends on time and space, not being sealed and made significant at all times. And it cannot endure because there is still something within that is being held back. There is a part of the lover and/or the beloved that is not yet willing to be given to the other. There are still things that need to be fixed, issues to be discussed, struggles that have to be overcome. In short, love has to be worked out in order for it to be said.

But then, when time comes that the lover and the beloved will be comfortable enough, courageous enough, to say those three words, then the act of saying it becomes more significant, more striking, and definitely more binding than any set of words or expressions that could signify intimacy and commitment.

A reflection based on the twelfth episode of the second season of "How I Met Your Mother" and Ludwig Wittgenstein's discussion of the nature of words in the Philosophical Investigations.

What?! Your Teacher Is An A.B. Graduate?!?!

2010-11-29T06:24:00.000-08:00

... and other thoughts about the AB graduate as a teacher.

Just this night I was able to read Fr. Horacio de la Costa's article and message to the A.B. graduates of Ateneo's batch 1933 (by the way, you can read the full text here). While reading this, it made me ponder on my status as a teacher who graduated with loads of Humanities subjects that do not promise any specialization which could land one a high-income position at corporations.

After graduating, I tried to find a place where I can work, and, believe it or not, despite being an anti-corporate advocate of social justice, I considered working for corporate firms as an option. After going through interviews and stuff, I kind of realized that I really don't belong in that world where too much business and moneymaking is placed at the forefront. Besides not being able to know anything, I see myself as someone who is not willing to sacrifice values and principles just for the sake of earning profit and earning money to live.

Eventually, I found a job in the form of a high school teacher, teaching Christian Life Education, which is something that a Pre-Divinity major is expected to execute quite well. But then, as soon as I entered the life of a teacher and hence the classroom, I found out that there were still a lot of things that I needed to learn. For one, I didn't know anything about the "mumbo-jumbo" (as I initially called it) related to teaching high school kids, such as classroom management, dynamics, and that "Understanding by Design" that requires strict systematization in designing the learning experience for students. In that aspect, I felt that I was way way behind all the other teachers who not only spent four years of preparing for the teaching service, but also majored in the particular subject that they are teaching. In other words, they came prepared. Very prepared.

That is why I was led to even think. Am I really in the job that I want? My inquiry got deeper when I was able to see how my other friends outside the circle of the Humanities graduates are doing fine as well in their fields. Did I even take the right course in the first place?

And I believe that after looking at the way I was prepared by the Ateneo as an A.B. graduate to face this world and live life, I think that graduating with a degree in Bachelor of Arts might not only be the best thing to happen, but also the best way of preparing to enter any kind of job and, ultimately, living life.

Sure, it is true that we did not have anything that will prepare us for a spot in the world of jobs, either in the corporate world or in the field of education that I and a few of my fellow A.B. graduates are right now. We did not have any technical terms, concepts, and subjects that teach us in specifically dealing with the jobs that we are in right now. It is true that we did not have anything that we corresponds to those subjects like marketing, or accounting, or Understanding by Design, or those "technical" or "work-related" subjects that we are going to use in the future.

But then, we have the vast world of philosophy, literature, ethics, and critical theory, that we have loved and developed a passion for. Our A.B. courses taught us wisdom not in the level of computations, table interpretations, and scientific experiments, but a kind of wisdom that allows us to define our values and principles that become our guides and foundations. More importantly, we have been taught the discipline of reading through the texts, spending hours and hours making notes out of them, rereading and highlighting them, and coming up with our own interpretations, understandings, and reflections about them. We have been taught the discipline of sticking to what we believe in and fighting for it through different projects and drives which show us that fighting for these values and principles are ultimately worth it. We might not be promised with a big executive position in companies and a major position in academic institutions, but we are promised with a way of finding ourselves in our world, not being swayed by outside forces that tend to destroy us from within and without.

We might not know the way to market a particular product, or treat a particular disease, or compute for our losses and gains when entering into a business. But through the way we read Kant and Heidegger, explored the various ways of interpreting different poems and novels, seeing them through the eyes of Fraud, Saussiere, Baudrillard, and other critical theorists, we for a certain discipline, a certain way of life that allows us to see what should be pursued in life, what good should be done, and what purpose should we serve. In the end, I agree with what Fr. de la Costa said, that we are not trained towards life-work, but towards life itself. And isn't that a noble thing to study for, to pursue, more nobler than just getting a job and earning a lot of money?

That is why as a teacher, I never regretted being an A.B. graduate in a school that gives emphasis on the Humanities, Philosophy, and Literature, and I find it perhaps more helpful than just having an Education degree from somewhere. Through the training that I received as an A.B. graduate, I was able to teach my students in what I believe would inspire them to find who they are and what they want in this life. I may have failed in terms of technicalities and conceptual applications that those who are specialized in the field are very familiar with, but I can say that in so far as letting my students determine and realize the values that they need to live in life, I have, in one way or another, be able to do it. I may not have used or applied all those things I have learned in my Classroom Dynamics class, but I believe I've had enough time to discuss what my subject means and how it allows them to live a happier and more fulfilled life.

And I believe that in the end, in a world where people need to realize that life is more than just finding a job, it is but fitting to have an A.B. graduates who are prepared to stand up for what really matters. It is fitting for us to enter the world as people who will enlighten others and help them realize the beauty and the wonder of life. It is just fitting for us to prepare others to live life the way we are raised to be as an A.B. graduate.

And doing this, I can say that I am a proud A.B. graduate.

Postscript: Read the last three paragraphs. I believe that they are the best and most striking lines said by Fr. de la Costa.

R.I.P. Leslie Nielsen

2010-11-28T21:33:00.000-08:00

The star of the Naked Gun will be missed.

I Pay My Last Respects

2010-11-03T01:38:00.000-07:00

The Home of Nu Rock, as this generation calls it.

Unfortunately, because all of us have succumbed to the whims and desires of the consumerist society, it will be torn down, only to be replaced by something that the listeners of NU 107 would be hardly displeased.

And for me, it is travesty. It is a desecration. It is a destruction of a home. For me, it was the blasphemy of all blasphemies, like tearing a church apart just to build a whorehouse specifically catering lowlifes.

NU has been the home of those who wish to deviate, to separate themselves from the blind crowd and decide to be authentic, to be different, and to be someone who can say that they proudly pursue what they love. It has been a home for their ears, for their music, for their culture, for their lives, for their future, and for their life.

Not only has this been a home, but also this has been a part of the story of their lives. This was the one station on the airwaves that catered to the different, to the separated, even to the ideological and the avant garde. Not only that, it has also been a refuge even for those who would want to just swing life away, who separate themselves momentarily from work and relax, chill, and enjoy rock music at its finest.

I, for one, was among those who benefitted from NU, to the point that my life really did a one-eighty because of it.

I discovered NU when I was in the late second year of my high school, searching for something new in my life after being tired of listening to pop and search for something more satisfying in terms of music. Back then, I was listening only to one station, the now-defunct Campus Radio LSFM which also featured more than just your typical pop-rock (unfortunately, it suffered the fate as NU will suffer in the next months). One of my classmates, after inviting me to play drums in a band that he is planning to form, suggested that I listen to a lot of different rock styles so as to come up with a default genre for our band. And he recommended NU.

And it was then that I opened the box.

It was there where I discovered about punk, progressive rock, (later on) electronic, britrock, and many other styles that drew me, attracted me to pursue greater things.

It was there where I discovered the emerging post-Eraserheads local acts that are worth listening to. Listening to NU led me to Sandwich, Sugarfree, the revamped Rivermaya, the revived The Dawn, Bamboo, and later on, to the Ambassadors, Urbandub, Pedicab, Itchyworms, and many other bands that formed authentic pinoy music.

It was there where, during my youth, I discovered early emotional hardcore rock, indie, and other genres I have never heard before. It was also there where I loved punk rock and its various forms and subgenres, allowing me to discover those less known bands, such as (during that time) My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy, Placebo, and the likes of them.

It was there where I, together with the band that we formed, planned to pursue our musical dreams by sending a mixtape to them (unfortunately, we were not able to push through).

It was there where I also discovered a lot of bands, both local and foreign, which pleased my ears and ushered a new life of tunes.

It was there where I was led to appreciate Pinoy Rock through the Rock Awards, telling myself that the Filipino, in spite of the wave of jologs music, still has some spunk left in him to be rightfully called artistic.

Later on, it was there where I could, through Halikinu Radio, get updates and comments from the teams and tunes of the school that has been my home as well. Add to that the fact that I was greeted on air every weekend, thanks to a close friend who had a stint at Halikinu.

It was there where my life of rock was founded upon and ushered new possibilities, new dreams, and new choices for me when it comes to music. Thanks to NU, I already have a whole lot of CDs and mp3s that shaped my life and partly made me who I am now.

NU 107 has been a comfort zone, a home of sorts, a refuge, a formation house for me. And now they are going to tear it down and replace it with things that the music community might not even call decent music. Tearing it down would be, for our generation, tearing apart our stories, our historicities, our culture, which we made an essential part of our life.

Goodbye NU 107, you could have formed a lot of minds and hearts which could serve as the foundation for the arts of the future Filipino, but this society doesn't have the right mind and heart to be with you and all those who listen to you. Rest assured, you will remain in our hearts, and we promise to keep the flame of passion to rock out alive and burning. It is in us where the Home of New Rock will continue to thrive and remain a real home.

Thoughts Beneath The Fire

2010-10-17T16:02:00.001-07:00

I think there is nothing more to say except repeat the things that were said after the Ateneo Blue Eagles received their third championship trophy in men's basketball. As everyone said, it was so far the hardest yet most wonderful ride that the Blue Squad has taken so far.

And I, for one, found it as such, but perhaps not as passionate, not as emotion-filled compared to those who spent their Ateneo days basking in the glory of winning the basketball title and having the bragging rights starting their freshman year.

What the Ateneo Blue Eagles have gone through this year came close to that one way back in 2006, where, as a freshman, I was able to experience the greatest sports heartbreak I ever experienced. During that year, the Blue Eagles failed to secure a championship that could have been theirs to take if not for bad decisions and grisly circumstances. Instead, the UST Growling Tigers took a hold of it.

The following year, as we were waiting for someone to step up and take on the role of the leader for the team, was more of a transitional one, a time to hang on and, in a way, let others still feel the presence of the Eagles as a competitive force in the UAAP. Yes, we managed to defeat La Salle during the eliminations, but we lost the most important battles which could have put us a notch above them during that season. Later on, it was La Salle who got the championship after getting two Finals wins against the 14-0 UE Warriors.

And for those who watched these games, who followed the Blue Squad through and through, those were heartbreaking experience. Those were losses that seemed to be never forgotten, as they were opportunities that slipped from us, that could have been earlier moments of victory.

Out of these painful experiences, we learned to treasure wins and leads the hard way.

Maybe that's why our lot would want so much wins during the next three years. Perhaps that's what fueled us to get out, watch, cheer, and expect for the win. And finally, I believe, it was what made us savor and make the most out of these last three years of watching and appreciating basketball.

Out first two years of college taught us a lesson, and if there is something to be learned in these last three years of cheering for the Blue, it was the value of presence, of being there, in joys and pains, in losses and gains.

This might be the most obvious thing that Team Ateneo has, although the message is clearer and more internalized for us than most, who were just there because of the fact that Ateneo is a winning team these past three seasons. It resounds in every game, and each and every one of it reminds us of what we have to risk, gain, and lose in each and every game.

But right now, we won, and we have the right to celebrate. Maybe, it will be different next year, as the Blue Eagles will eventually get better and, rest assured, own the UAAP season. But for us who have gone through everything just to get over the past and work our way towards the win, what gets to stay is our passion, our presence, our determination to unite as one.

United towards One Big Fight.

This New Way of Life

2010-09-27T17:53:00.000-07:00

Now, why am I not writing about the joys and sorrows of being a high school teacher?

It's because I'm too busy. Too busy with checking papers. Too busy preparing lesson plans. Too busy coming up with creative ideas for their performance tasks and other assessments. Too busy with making powerpoints. Too busy joining them in their various activities, like working as baggers in SM.

Whereas if I taught philosophy in college, I think I would have the luxury of time to blog a lot, to write about basketball, to even continue my musings on key existential ideas. I should have chose that because I was well-trained for it, because that has been my passion since the time I entered college and understood the meaning of the word "philosophy."

But certain events in my life led me to this decision, and at this point in time, I can say that due to the things that I have experienced, I don't regret choosing to teach in high school.

Is it because of the pay? Not even. If it's because of money, then I could have left the vocation of teaching and instead entered a company or a big newspaper firm and wrote lots of articles for them. It's part of the things that I can and love to do, anyway.

Is it because of lighter intellectual work? Far from it. In fact, teaching high school seems to be more difficult than teaching philosophy. I even had to do what I'm not really accustomed to doing: planning and preparing for things that I have to teach, coming up with different creative and engaging activities that deviate from the usual conventional styles, and even organizing the way I would have to deliver the important concepts in and out of class (which includes accompanying them in different school activities).

Is it because of a lighter form of work? Definitely not. Teacher life is not cloud-hopping all day long. Most of the time you go home with a lot of academic load at your back. You have to check those papers and design activities within a given time. When you go home, routines are still present, and it might be possible that you're going to miss the latest episode of "Chuck" or postpone watching Japanese films and save them for the weekend. In fact, work load is so much heavier compared to that in college, and there's a great deal of adjustment involve in terms of living my life and coping up with work.

And sometimes it brings you down. It comes with a lot of stress that you just want to eat and eat while doing these in your workroom or at home. It makes you think, raises questions, as to why you are still in this job, or, most appropriately, why you pursued this particular vocation.

But despite those things, I say that I'm happy with it.

I'm happy whenever my students were able to understand what I'm teaching. I'm happy whenever they come up with their deep, moving, and insightful class prayer services which would really surprise any Chrristian Life Education teacher who have seen these. I'm happy with the way students get along with me and ask me various questions about what I teach. I'm happy with how they get along with me and talk not just about religion but also basketball fantasy leagues, their plans for college, as well as their sentiments about the things that they have experienced during the past days. It might be true that the teacher would invest all of his time and effort to the students just for a relatively low salary compared to that of business employees. But then, where else could you find such sense of fulfillment? Where else could you be able to serve and actually take care of other people who are just like you? Nothing, except in the school, where everyone grows and becomes actually human both inside and outside the classrooms and the workrooms.

And I guess I'm satisfied with that. These reasons might not be clear and intelligible enough to serve as explanations. But after a few months of teaching, together with the little successes and failures that come with it, one thing is clear for the person who once saw himself as a philosopher: that the philosophy that he has learned should be exigent. It should get out of itself and encounter the daily lives and struggles of the people around the thinker. It has to serve as a foundation for living, to ground everything in it, to apply it and impart the lessons that it teaches in particular contexts, in particular subjects, in particular classes. And for me, it is in forming these young men, in being with them, in teaching and guiding them, that the philosophy that I have learned in college is enfleshed. It becomes truly alive, truly lived.

It might be busy. It might take most of my time. It might leave me with no free time at all. But who cares, as long as you're growing to be happy and fulfilled with it?

Knowing Loving

2010-07-28T01:25:00.000-07:00

Oh it is love from the first / Time I set my lips against yours / Thinking, "Oh, is it love?"
-Hellogoodbye

Making sense of human existence unavoidably includes the search for the meaning of the experience of love. There is this wanting to understand what love is and, most importantly for some, what makes it special, distinct from other experiences. Perhaps one of the questions that experience continually bothers us is "how do I know that I love someone?"

The moment when we ask this question awakens us to the fact that love is a very unique experience in our lives. It is something that draws us, attracts us, and pleases us in life, that which makes us feel relieved in the midst of the absurdities and incongruencies that life has dawned upon us. However, it also reminds us that love is a responsible offering of oneself to that which gives you happiness. In asking this question, you go deeper and dwell into its authenticity, trying to know in what ways can we know that we are loving someone. It is an attempt to look through one's actions and then conclude whether one is loving or not towards another.

Are our sweet nothings and little moments enough to be called love already? Does my deep longing for that person already love? With all the things that we have been doing, is this love? When asking these questions, we put the starting point on our own experience s and deeds, actions which, when proven true, would lead us to conclude whether it is love or not.

But would it be right to start with these actions? Do we really have to start with these "proofs" and "evidences" so that we can conclude that it is love? Is love really the end of this equation?

I believe that we have to turn everything around. It is not the case that we should start with our perception of our actions as "proofs." If we start with those things, we will only see a shallow aspect of love, one that is manifested by concrete actions and thoughts. In the end, we will not be able to see love in its truest form.

The experience of love will only truly make sense if we place it as the starting point of our understanding. Love should be first and foremost primarily understood as a movement of the will. The decision to love is to take a leap towards greater meaning in our lives. It is only in the will to love, to offer oneself for the other by seeking her and seeking her happiness as well, that we come to understand everything. Yes, love might entail knowing someone and being on a certain level of intimacy; however, they could never become indicators of love. At the most, they are mere body contacts that do not really mean anything. All of these things make sense when we decide to love the other.

We say that love indeed makes the ride worthwhile. However, as seen previously, we can't even ask if we can make the ride or if its trips will be meaningful for it to be considered a good ride. It is only in riding and going for the trip, that we will be able to make every twist and turn of the vehicle worthwhile.

And thus, when we discard the question and instead put the will to love as a starting point, everything not only becomes different but also makes more sense. When a person primarily wills to love the other and makes it the center of things, then experiences will have a new meaning to reveal and a new light to shed in our minds and hearts. Each sign, symbol, and expression to communicate one's presence to the other are not just meaningless movements, because for the person who loves and is loved, they are acts which manifest love as an act of will. With the will to love, human existence is given a new direction and a meaningful purpose. Everything now is oriented towards achieving happiness by accepting the other as she is. With love, there is fullness of life. With love, there is meaning. With love, there goes the meaning of human existence.

But unless we decide to love, to take the leap and risk everything that we have for the other, nothing makes any real sense at all.

6 Points: AdMU vs. DLSU

2010-07-24T07:20:00.000-07:00

Ateneo 63, La Salle 66

-Part of the rebuilding process is the need for experimentation, and coach Norman Black did just that during this game. He experimented with various lineups to catch up with the Phoenix Suns-like play of DLSU.

-A closer. That is what we need. Perhaps this would be the worst game where Ateneo had the chance to win the game through a comforting 9-point lead. Someone has to step up and play both offense and defense. Besides the game being against La Salle, this was the most heartbreaking because the blue team never expected that the squad will lose.

-Kirk Long was the factor. A pump three, behind the back layup, and five fouls.

-Sam Marata took the opportunity to bring the lead to DLSU when Ateneo played sloppily.

-I think the 6th Men got used to winning too much. We have to cheer harder even in the midst of difficulties.

Quarter scores

DLSU 66 – Webb 12, Marata 12, Atkins 9, Tampus 6, Andrada 6, de la Paz 5, Tolentino 5, Mendoza 5, Vosotros 3, Villanueva 2, Ferdinand 1, Paredes 0.

Ateneo 63 – Chua 16, Monfort 11, Long 9, Buenafe 7, Salamat 6, Salva 5, Golla 3, Escueta 2, dela Cruz 2, Austria 2, Tiongson 0, Gonzaga 0.

Quarter scoring: 14-15, 26-30, 46-42, 66-63

Make Or Break: AdMU vs. DLSU

2010-07-22T16:36:00.000-07:00

Ateneo de Manila University Blue Eagles (2-1)

Make:
-Eric Salamat's health and, therefore, his effectivity in his game counts. Coming off the bench with a knee contrusion, there is no guarantee that he can play a hundred percent and therefore get his game back.
-It's still defense. La Salle's games against UE and UP made all their shooters look really good from the outside , while their match against NU proved that with good defense, everyone in the Green Squad will falter. A more efficient zone defense which could also give way for bodies to be placed on their shooters.

Break:
-Too much shooting from beyond the arc. It would be better for them to choose their shots well, with most of their attempts from the paint and trying to force fouls.
-Filling in the point guard spot. Coach Norman Black should perhaps work out an effective 8-10 man rotation which would allow their combo guard and forward players to find their spots.

De La Salle University Green Archers (2-1)

Make:
-Wingmen efficiency. They were able to beat UP and UE with their mid- and long-range effectivity, coming from their experienced back court composed of Tolentino, Atkins, and Marata. Making those long jumpers would eventually force Ateneo to stretch their defense, therefore allowing more opportunities inside the paint.
-Two players off the bench would be quite crucial in bringing La Salle to their first ever victory against the Eagles in two years: Almond Vosotros and Yutien Andrada. While Andrada can shut down almost every member of the Blue frontcourt, Vosotros can outrun anyone and destroy the rhythm of Ateneo defense. Ateneo has to have someone who can check him

Break:
-The tiring full court press seems to not work with Ateneo anymore. However, if they continue to employ this defensive play, they are in danger of racking up too many fouls. Previously, UE was able to capitalize on the early penalty and calls toward the charity stripe. With quicker players who can bring the ball on both sides of the court, Ateneo might just seize that opportunity as well.
-The Archers have a tendency to play hit-or-miss and will gamble on wild out-of-this-world jumpers (among those who do these is forward Joshua Webb). Once they start to panic and lose the determination to bring the ball inside, then the game should finish early in the second half.

One Big Fight.

Takes: Inception

2010-07-20T16:54:00.000-07:00

This just shows how great can Christopher Nolan be, and guys like these are those that we really need in this generation of shallow people who are too immersed in simplistic pleasures and thoughts.

However, I would not say that it raises deep philosophical questions. Like "The Matrix," it stands on an already misunderstood notion of the human mind - the Cartesian idea that the starting point of knowledge (and hence the idea of truth and meaning) is founded on the individual thinking being, the cogito, all alone and separated from the supposed "reality" that he is in. This cogito is therefore stuck with itself, unable to get out and encounter reality except through his own mental constructs and projections.

But with how it was mixed up with psychology and our notion of drawing the line between what is real and what is not effectively disturbed us and once again ask either Lao Tzu's question of the dream, or Descartes' second question in his method of arriving towards the cogito.

The question: am I real? Is everything real? Or are these merely states of mind implanted in my head and I'm sleeping somewhere, in eternal slumber?

Interesting as to how existentialists can answer this.

The Many Faces of Basketball Passion

2010-07-19T03:37:00.000-07:00

Heck, no. Not Yutien Andrada.

But when we talk about the explosion of passion in the game, there's certainly one guy who can do the job better than the Boston Celtics' "Shrek," it's Ateneo's reserve big man, Jumbo Escueta.

In him is passion personified.

Better look out for him. He's got all the potential to be the next Blue Monster.

Pictures from fabilioh.com.

6 Points: AdMU vs. UST

2010-07-18T07:01:00.000-07:00

Ateneo 68, UST 56

-First things first: Justin Chua. With his advantage over the UST frontcourt guys combined, he was able to score off kickouts and even drove down the lane for a weird layup. He really was someone we need in times like these. Beef up like Jumbo, and you'll be a formidable big man.
-Norman Black's frontcourt combo seemed unusual for the spectator. However, it has proved to be useful, considering that it responded to the need to neutralize UST undersized big men.
-Emman Monfort, after becoming the unlikely hero against the Falcons, slightly turned the tables after doing a "Vujacic." The Eagles should have pulled away early if not for that.
-For this season, digging deep into the bench and tapping all those the Eagles really need in particular situations would prove helpful not just this season, but in the future as well. Perhaps a way of building the next "power team"? Maybe.
-Eric Salamat ought to rest and play limited minutes. His injury restricted him to play his game, as he was left limping after breaks. Good job with his swipes, though.
-This is the game that the Season 72 fans miss. We have to accept that we got too used to winning by a blowout. Let this be a message that it can still happen. But then, discipline is what we need.

Ateneo 68 - Chua 17, Salva 14, Monfort 8, Salamat 7, Golla 7, dela Cruz 5, Long 2, Austria 2, Buenafe 0, Tiongson 0
UST 56 - Bautista 11, Teng 10, Camus 8, Mariano 7, Fortuna 7, Pe 4, Afuang 4, Marata 2, Aytona 2, Daquioag 1, Wong 0, Tinte 0, Mamaril 0, Lo 0

Quarter Scores: 15-14, 31-32, 51-46, 68-56

Goateneo.com for the picture, a.dy for some details.

6 Points: AdMU vs. AdU

2010-07-15T07:49:00.000-07:00

Ateneo 69, AdU 66

-a Twiterrific view of the game (thanks to a few reliable sources) was not great. Mostly not great if this is your team's first win. (From this point on, just append the phrases I heard/They said, etc.) But then, a win's worthy of writing about, no matter how "blurred" one's vision is, isn't it?
-Eric Salamat's "knee contrusion" started to bother him once again. I hope that it will turn out just fine. We still have 12 more games to play. Nico Salva added his own pains as well.
-I agree with my brother. Expect that Ateneo games will cause various strokes and nervous breakdowns. I'm guessing there will be no blow out victories for this season… even until the championship match (I'm already assuming here).
-a good potential blow-out game, but too bad Adamson got too hot and got close during the fourth quarter. I know the nickname "Pocket Rocket" isn't much of a catch, thank you nevertheless, Emman Monfort.
-believe me, there are Sixth Men who can do the job even better while they are concentrating on their jobs.
-The same things that will keep us alive: momentum and discipline. We were nearly beat there. Good thing we've got some of these two to keep us alive. I expect more of these things in the next games.

Ateneo 69 – Long 12, Salva 10, Salamat 10, Buenafe 10, Monfort 8, Escueta 7, dela Cruz 3, Golla 3, Erram 2, Tiongson 2, Austria 2, Gonzaga 0.

Adamson 66 – Nuyles 18, Alvarez 17, Colina 9, Manyara 7, Canada 5, Stinnett 3, Cabrera 3, Lozada 2, Camson 2, Monteclaro 0, Galinato 0.

Quarter scores: 17-13, 41-32, 52-52, 69-66.

Fabilioh.com for the picture.

Special thanks to PressBreakPress (Dy, Valdez, de Leon, et al.) and A.dy for the reliable info.

6 Points: AdMU vs. FEU

2010-07-12T07:26:00.000-07:00

Ateneo 69, FEU 72

-Perhaps just a case of bad decision-making during the last stretch. In the end, it was only by a stroke of luck (or is it? RR Garcia, hmm) that Ateneo got a chance to tie the game and force overtime. Unfortunately, Nico Salva opted to go for a reverse layup instead of the usual.

-Roose Garcia scoring 25 points is a huge factor on both sides. While FEU proved that there can be quite a good few who can step up, they have reason enough to fear a rebuilding Ateneo team who locked down JR Cawaling and Aldrech Ramos down the stretch. But Exciminiano with 2 points and 10 boards? Oh, c'mon.

-Arthur dela Cruz is a surprise. He just needs to be more creative with his shots, as FEU got him during the second half.

-Erram and Escueta, given enough playing time and opportunities to step up, could turn out to be formidable big men after 13 more games. Let's see how they get into the Black rhythm.

-Removing the pressure off Emman Monfort and giving Juami Tiongson playing time might help. However, size problems could make that improbable.

-The Sixth Men were too silent and passive during first game. I know that FEU hogged the tickets, but that's no reason to not cheer our hearts out.

FEU (72) – Garcia 25, Cervantes 13, Ramos 10, Sanga 9, Bringas 8, Noundou 3, Romeo 2, Exciminiano 2, Mendoza 0, Knuttel 0, Cawaling 0.

ADMU (69) – Salva 14, Buenafe 13, Long 11, Dela Cruz 10, Escueta 6, Salamat 6, Monfort 3, Erram 2, Golla 2, Chua 2, Gonzaga 0, Austria 0.

Quarterscores: 11-15, 35-30, 51-52, 72-69

The Rise, Fall, and Rise of Ronald Artest

2010-07-01T03:48:00.000-07:00

*This is a rough draft of an article supposedly co-written with my brother as well as some of his friends. For the final version, I will announce the definite name of the website and the URL of this co-authored blog. But for now, enjoy.

Redemption is the name of the game.

The 2010 NBA Finals ended in a much sweeter and glorious note compared to that of last year, as the Los Angeles Lakers took their second straight title after defeating historic rivals the Boston Celtics. And for everyone in the purple and gold, especially those who were part of those who lost last 2008 to this same Green Team, all was more hard fought.

For Kobe Bryant and the rest of the '08 Lakers, this is not just any back-to-back title. It is a symbol of their revenge, their way of getting back at the Celtics for bullying them two years ago. It stands proof that Kobe Bryant fully cemented his legacy as one of the greatest Lakers ever who had the chance to beat the Boston Celtics - a position he shares with Magic Johnson, avoiding what has happened to Laker legend Jerry West. For Lamar Odom and Pau Gasol, it is a symbol of the toughness and passion that they have grown into, and for the rest, a chance to get back at the mistakes of the last two years.

But surprisingly, they were not the ones whose celebrations stood out and became real and live expressions of emotions.

It was nothing more real, more emotional, more victorious, than Ron Artest's, and for him, this is more than a title, heck more than a salvation of one's legacy or basketball career in hopes of becoming a legend someday.

The Larry O'Brien trophy brought him back his sense of self, both as a basketball player and as a person.

The Ron Artest Way

When the Lakers signed Ron Artest for a five-year deal, there were two points raised by sports critics and analysts about his integration into the Lakers team.

The first was the way he would adjust to the Lakers team defense (which, obviously he would provide a big boost to) and the famous triangle offense. But that was the least of their concerns. Rather, what they were worried about was Ron Artest's on- and off-court behavior, which could affect the overall discipline, image, and gameplay of the team.

Anyone who has watched the NBA at least for the last five or six years has heard of Ron Artest's significant attitude and swagger. Despite being regarded as one of the top defensive men of the decade, he also got the "rough bad boy" image, being strongly associated with his acts of defiance and, for lack of a better and more accurate word, "violence."

And we can count various demerits, starting with the famous (and the biggest and most violent) brawl way back 2004, when, back as an Indiana Pacer, his foul on the Detroit Piston's center Ben Wallace ended up with him throwing a punch at a fan and eventually being suspended for the regular season.

The trade which sent him to the Sacramento Kings for year-long stint did not do any kind of damage control in his image. He never did get worse, but there were still traces of the Ron Artest of the brawl, with technical fouls and occasional ejections every now and then. But looking on the bright side of his career, he provided the energy that the withered Kings needed just to hang on. Along with the young, blooming Kevin Martin, Artest carried the load of the Kings on both ends of the court until the first round of the playoffs, where the San Antonio Spurs eliminated them in six games.

Afterwards, a trade brought him to the Houston Rockets, which promised a new era not only for himself, in the course of his attempt to show that he is still worthy of respect, but also for the Rockets as a team. Together with Yao Ming, Tracy McGrady, and Shane Battier, Artest shaped Houston into a Western Conference contender, cementing a smooth road to the playoffs, albeit a rough and violent one.

The Lakers fans won't even forget their woes against Ron Artest in the course of the seven-game battle between L.A. and Houston. Before the regular season ends, Kobe Bryant and Ron Artest were charged with technical fouls each for badmouthing each other near the end of the game. During Game 2 of the Western Conference semifinals, he was ejected when he showed antagonism over Bryant after a contested call. He faced another ejection in Game 3 when he put up his arms on the face of a driving Pau Gasol.

Eventually, the series ended with the Lakers winning, as Kobe Bryant and Ron Artest shared congratulatory remarks and words of encouragement after game seven, putting behind everything that happened between them during those momentous playoff series. And during that time, nobody ever thought of a partnership between them.

Wearing That Lakers Jersey

The 2009 Los Angeles Lakers, after winning the championship against the Orlando Magic, find themselves still intact as a team, save for one - Trevor Ariza. For the team, he is as valuable as every teammate, most especially during the course of the playoffs where he showed what he can really do - make the necessary stops, run for fastbreak points, and even hit crucial threes and perimeters if not cutting and dunking. As soon as his contract expired, the Lakers were already determined to sign him in for five more years.

However, things didn't turn out as it was planned, as Ariza's agent turned down the Lakers' offer which covers the mid-level exception, the only available offer for the Lakers so as to avoid overspending, being way above the lowered salary cap. Because of that, Ariza's management agreed with the other contesting offer, that of the Houston Rockets.

In spite of Artest's performance, the Rockets did not want him back, becoming satisfied with Ariza. It was then that the Lakers, in a way, chased after him. They offered him the MLE contract, which he immediately accepted. He wore the number 37, the number of weeks that the late Michael Jackson's album, "Thriller," stayed on the number one Billboard Chart.

For Artest, being in L.A. was a very special opportunity for him. It is a gift, a positive reinforcer which suited his needs for fame and respect. From the most hated by the Staples crowd, he was warmly accepted by Tinseltown. He grew instant fame not just with his offseason modeling sideline across different L.A. independent labels, but also his gimmicks which he frequently tweeted (and constantly retweeted) in his "TruWarier" account. With these perks, it seems that the Lakers will keep him behaved for at least five years.

The regular season began without even a harsh comment pointed against Artest. There was no major news of misbehavior, even gaining the love of the L.A. crowd while playing great team defense alongside Kobe Bryant and the purple and gold. It seems that everyone realized that a little change might provide them a boost, with greater hopes of defending the title and repeating their 2009 performance.

But everything was not all good between Artest and the Lakers. At times, it was evident that he was not like Ariza who could fit into the triangle perfectly, primarily because of their differences in speed and offense. While half of the Lakers analysts were praising Ron Artest for becoming a defensive boost in the Lakers, the other half was complaining about his offensive inefficiency, as he was characterized with poor perimeter shooting and slow cutting which disrupted the speed of the execution of the triangle. Add to that the fact that Artest was absent when the Lakers needed him most during the Christmas season, when he said he fell down the stairs while bringing gifts back home and was sidelined with a mild injury.

And during the course of the regular season, Laker fans worried about not only the looming injuries of Lakers stars, most especially Kobe Bryant and Andrew Bynum, but also the effectiveness of Ron Artest as a replacement to Ariza.

The Transfiguration: The NBA Playoffs

These doubts and criticisms continued to surface even until the NBA playoffs. Albeit finishing with a decent 57-25 record in the West, the Lakers are still facing a tough road ahead, as they were set to fight a battle within the team (their injuries and efficiency) and without.

During the first round, the Purple and Gold were put against eighth seeded Oklahoma Thunder, which boasts of a high-octane offense led by the young rising star Kevin Durant. Artest was once again given a chance to prove himself a true Laker warrior when he was assigned to put the shackles on KD and prevent him from having big games.

And defended he did. Laker fans were once again comforted by the fact that Artest was there, as he never left Durant on his own throughout the six-game battle. He always had his body to put against Durant's, and a hand raised not only on his shot but also in his face. As the Lakers pulled away to win and advance to the next round, KD35, the 2010 scoring champion, was effectively limited to below 35 points, not allowing the Thunder to greatly pull away and the Lakers to close them out.

From there, Artest would have his own up and down performances, putting the Lakers on several high and low moments. His offensive efficiency against Utah, in the course of also taking the responsibility to defend the wingmen of the Jazz, was also questioned; however, he proved that he can contribute as well, finding his shooting spots, and even running up to get the offensive board, run back down to the three point line, and make the trey. In sweeping the series, Artest has proven himself quite helpful.

But not as much during the Western Conference Finals against the Phoenix Suns. He went well with the Lakers team defense when they put the Suns away during the first two games. But in the two consecutive losses against the Suns in their home court, it was Artest who destroyed two opportunities of the Lakers offense to put them away. He was known to have hurried the offense with his quick but contested three-pointers, missing most of them. During times when he was supposed to step up and be the man, he failed to do so, even causing problems with turnovers and transition defense. During the course of the series, he was as random as a quantum particle, doing good and bad at times, coming out big in one moment, and not being helpful in another. The way he becomes a teammate to the Lakers became a major concern for the rest of their playoff games. Most of the Lakers fans even wished Ariza was there to play this game for them.

Come Game 5 of the Western Conference Finals, where the Lakers sense the need to win to break the tie and gain the momentum before heading to Phoenix for Game 6. During the dying minutes of the game, Phoenix rallied from an 18 point deficit to tie the game101. As a last resort, the Lakers got the ball to Kobe Bryant as he struggled to shoot the ball from the right arc. His shot did not even touch the rim, but Artest cut into the paint, grabbed the ball and immediately put up a difficult last-minute shot to end the game in favor of the Lakers, 103-101. For some, it was his first act of redemption, as that last minute shot has proved that he is a valuable teammate, and for him, this shot gave him back the confidence that he was supposed to have as a Laker playing alongside the 2009 World Champions.

Artest's randomness (as well as the critics' doubts) didn't diminish even during the NBA Finals against the Boston Celtics. He was a very important defensive element in Game 1, always playing the D against the Celtics' best scorer and team leader, Paul Pierce. However, he once again destroyed the team offense in Game 2 with their only home loss in the playoffs, hitting too many three pointers and not making a single one of them. Though insignificant in the next games (save for his defense on Paul Pierce), his biggest playoff mistake was not getting the last two Laker free throws in Game 5, eventually failing to make it a one-possession game and letting the Celtics get away and head to the Staples Center with a 3-2 series lead.

His great moment came in at Game Seven, when, after the Lakers massacred the Celtics in Game Six, everyone is expected to be at their best. Apparently, it was quite the contrary, as the Lakers found themselves digging a very deep hole, with Kobe Bryant and Pau Gasol going cold and inefficient. With the Lakers struggling, there has to be someone who has to step up and lead the team to a surge that could bring them to the win. Fortunately, they have the quantum particle, the one who is least expected to step up in the final game, where the pressure is greater than one expects.

It was Ron Artest who became the overnight hero, leading the Lakers to their biggest comeback in 2010. He started a 9-0 surge early in the second half to put the Lakers back on track, and made a cut sometime in the second half and scored a three-point play to once again keep L.A. afloat after being down by double digits. However, what made him special in Game 7 was the way he put a dagger in the heart of the Mean Green Team, making the trey after receiving a pass from Bryant and putting the Lakers ahead by six in the final minutes. In the end, he stepped up when no one did, made noise when everyone was quiet, pushed when no one can barely move and make a change in the game, and became a killer when no one could not be. He truly became the man of the game, the one everyone counted on when no one would dare do so in the most crucial of all games.

Getting Back Up

This single game seven, everything was redeemed. Sure, we can't throw away the swagger that Ron Artest has been. We can even say a lot of things about his problematic behavior which we can trace way back in Chicago (with the Hennessy in the locker room), Indiana, Sacramento, and Houston. But then, this outstanding performance is enough to bring back the respect that he ought to get - a kind of respect towards the way he played the game. His highlight performance was able to save his dignity as a real star in the realm of professional basketball, one that has to be taken seriously in all aspects of the game. For once, he was the man who cannot be denied on both ends of the court.

Playing alongside Kobe and filling in the shoes left by wingman Trevor Ariza, not only did Ron Artest save the Lakers from another loss against the Celtics. He also saved his own infamous legacy, making one of the most memorable, zero-to-hero performances in NBA history.

And even the postgame interviews, press conference, and his post-Finals appearances can attest to that. Ron Artest, so far, has been the greatest Cinderella story ever, and I do believe that no one could forget this man who rose, fell, and rose back up again with a glorious finish.

RIP Jose Saramago

2010-06-20T16:02:00.000-07:00

1922-2010.

My Lit 13 class would not have been memorable if not for your "Blindness."

The First Day of Classes

2010-06-14T18:31:00.000-07:00

I do not have any clear picture of what is going to happen during the first day of my classes. I spent the weekend preparing for this: designing my blueprint for class order and discipline, laying out the requirements, making my powerpoint presentation that comes with images and icons that should be interesting for third and fourth year high school students, and psyching myself up and making the mental preparations necessary.

But Wednesday will be the first day that I face a real classroom situation, my encounter with my actual students who will be with me for one year. I will be there, facing them, giving them instructions, telling me what to do not only in my subject, but in their life during the next months. I will be there directing their future, forming their values while building a good relationship with them. I will be there not just to teach my Christian Living Education, but also, more importantly, to teach them that life is worth living, that the future is worth looking forward, that everything in this life has a reason.

Shorthanded may I be (I know everyone is), I am ready to present myself and be there for them. And perhaps, in the end, I might say that I chose the right path.

But right now, I feel that it is the right one for me. Onwards to the first day of school.

RIP John Wooden

2010-06-03T16:44:00.001-07:00

Perhaps the greatest college coach in basketball history.

Bringing It Down To The Finals

2010-06-01T16:07:00.000-07:00

I officially trashed my non-biased analysis which appears to be biased after all. Before the Conference Finals even ended, I have already made my analysis of the upcoming Lakers-Celtics battle, thinking that with the performance of both teams against the Phoenix Suns and the Orlando Magic respectively, it was already a sealed match. I have broken down the seven-game series into five aspects of the game, and looked at who gets the advantage in each aspect.

1. On the offensive side, it seems that the Lakers will take it. They have the best scorer (and playmaker during the recent games, mind you) in Kobe Bryant. Plus, they have the bigs (and Ron Artest) who could go on the paint and score easy lay-ups. Boston, on the other hand, mostly gamble on long range shots with the exception of a few, like Rajon Rondo and Tony Allen.
2.However, the Celtics will have the advantage in D. To admit, the Purple and Gold have just let the Phoenix grab three-digit scores in the course of the whole Western Conference Finals. Gasol went soft during the last four games, allowing Stoudemire to posterize him and Robin Lopez to play like him. The team also drew a lot of fouls in the process, giving the Suns easy scores from the charity stripe. The Celtics, on the other hand, brought their best out and returned with their famous team defense. Rajon Rondo led the way in defense during the Eastern Conference Finals, and the team, even those on the bench, followed suit. With that, the Lakers might find themselves in a difficult situation in forcing the ball inside.
3.The bench could be the turning point and the deciding factor during the Finals. While the Lakers backups were mercurial (remember that it was Shannon Brown and Jordan Farmar who brought the Lakers down, scoring 1 out of 12 field goals in Game 4), the Celtics bench have been too active and unstoppable at times. Glen Davis hustled and scored from the outside. Kryptonate did his job in scoring 13 points through perimeter jumpers, and Rasheed Wallace emerged as a top performer.
4.I have to give the backcourt advantage to the Lakers because of Kobe Bryant, the frontcourt has to be taken by the Celtics because of Kevin Garnett. We could put the "unstoppable" stamp for both of them, simply because of their great performance and leadership during the playoffs. 'Nuff said.

I was not able to finish this one. But then, had I been able to, there would be two conclusions:

1.That the Lakers will win if they were able to break through the Celtics defense and have Kobe and Gasol take over both from outside and inside.
2.That the Celtics will win if they were able to hold the Lakers offense and keep the bench at a mercurial level.

I'm trashing all this in place of two things: first, the drama that exist within the Lakers' story, and second, the problems that they are facing. I have read several analysis, and these "non-objective," unbiased stats won't be able to say anything about the real battle within. Even most of the Lakers and Celtics fans have already resigned to the fact that this will be a perfectly equal match up.

But then, I disagree, as I was able to see the cracks and crevices which could emerge and altogether let the perfect plane of equality fall. And I believe that those who were really good at watching over the Lakers and the Celtics have seen these too.

For two years, this is what Kobe Bryant and the rest of the '08 team have been waiting for. Remember that the Lakers suffered the biggest losses of their lives during 2008, when they blew that 24-point lead to put up Celtics 3-1 in game 4 of the series, completely turning the tables to Boston, and the 39-point massacre that the Big Three did to Kobe, Pau Gasol, and Lamar Odom. This was probably the largest swords which stabbed the heart of the Lakers, and this is the largest and most painful wound, so large that not even the 2009 championship completely cured it.

But now, the Lakers have the chance to avenge their 2008 humiliation. They were like former school nerds trying to play the game on the bullies of the past, using stilts to reach them and school supplies to hit them. Kobe and his squad has been waiting for this for two long years. The Lakers now come in with a slightly different roster and a greatly higher level of maturity and gameplay. Three of the best teams of the West - the Thunder, the Jazz, and the Suns respectively - have gotten every bit of Laker gameplay: Ron Artest's tough D, the bigs' post presence, Elmo's pullups from beyond the arc, and Kobe's clutch plays. So far, the Lakers have played pretty tough team games down the stretch, and it is only then that they were able to secure good wins this summer.

But will this revived Lakers squad, who struggled with various injuries and made several mistakes on both ends, work against the Boston Celtics? All two seasons long, the Celtics have been criticized for being too rusty. The Big Three are set to retire or decline (in terms of gameplay) for the next five years or so. Though packed with a lot of stars and former stars, they just managed to end fourth seed in the East. However, come playoffs and we see a different Boston Celtics, now a team playing defense as if the Big Three came back from the past.

Boston's team defense stole the show which was supposed to star the Cleveland Cavaliers and the Orlando Magic. They ripped both of these teams in six games. Kevin Garnett, Ray Allen, and Paul Pierce showed that they are a team that should be taken seriously, that each grunt, shot, post move, and tweet should be feared. During the span of the playoffs, they showed that they are real championship contenders. They showed that they are the real beasts of the East.

The Lakers now have to play the role of the dragon slayers. They have been consistently good, but the Celtics, in twelve quick games, went way above L.A.'s level of play. So the Lakers have to do their job here. Either they reduce the monster to individual parts, which means breaking the Celtics defense with strategic offensive plays, or be eaten alive. However, the slaying will be complete if they will play Boston's game, which means they have to defend their basket as a team. They should learn to utilize their default strong side zone, while learning to adjust and find solutions on the weak side. They should learn to shut the Celtics' potent scorers down while forcing turnovers and initiating fast break plays. And from here, we talk about the problems haunting the purple and gold.

It might be easy to say and think of that as the Lakers really doing it perfectly, but it would be hard to, because the Lakers have a few imperfections which necessarily have to be tweaked, for in their weaknesses and errors lie the strengths and perfections of the Celtics.

The backup players of each squad will be important, when the matchups within the first five will "cancel" themselves out in tough game situations. While Lamar Odom remains to be the X-factor, the Lakers, for the past games, had a bench that was mercurial, with no one really stepping up and forcing the ball inside. If this non-existence continues, then the Lakers will be facing matchup problems, and hence, problems managing player consistency. It would be fine for Kobe and Pau to play 40 to 45 minutes per game, but once they get their rest, it would be important to keep everything afloat and alright, and that is what the bench players need to handle. If the Lakers can cause problem to the Celtics' big backups , namely Glen Davis, Rasheed Wallace, Nate Robinson, and the rest of the guys sitting out there, then they might as well have given the trophy to the Celtics.

And of course, we never leave this topic without physicality. The aging Celtics ironically got tougher and tougher as games progressed. They never settled for outside shots unless those who shoot are really sure of draining it. Their hard knock defense and hustle play made thin paper out of Dwight Howard and Shaq during the earlier matches. The bigs were forcing the ball inside as much as possible, while trying to grab each and every rebound from missed baskets. If there is a team that wants the ball so bad that they would bully their opponents, it will be the Celtics.

These two might be small factors, but they are so crucial that they could turn the tables around and force fate to favor the Mean Green Squad. And because these are the things that the Lakers need great improvement, I was led to think that they are facing an uphill battle. Yes, it is an uphill battle with problems to find solutions to, but once they do, they get to win the series.

The Celtics undoubtedly have the mental advantage over the Lakers, and they can use their memories of obliterating L.A. to pressure them. The Lakers' D during the past games have been really scattered, allowing Phoenix open shots from both inside and outside, an opportunity that Boston could seize during their offensive runs. The point guard position hasn't been totally filled up, and Rajon Rondo could own Derek Fisher, Jordan Farmar, or Shannon Brown anytime during the game. Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom have been branded as soft defenders during the Finals series. When the match-ups cancel each other out, the Celtics still have the advantage because their bench have the potential to explode anytime.

But then, when we talk about the Lakers, we see a team that really knows how to fight and put their poker faces on until the clock runs out. The purple and gold can prove that they have really grown stronger on both ends, with Kobe and Pau still leading the way. They can play team defense better than the Celtics do, using the combination of Bryant, Artest, Gasol, and Bynum to stop them from scoring in the paint and escaping with open perimeters. Derek Fisher could be, as we ironically expect it, a great surprise. The three to five players coming off the bench could do their job and provide genuine assistance (N.B., Vujacic could explode). And Pau Gasol? Last time everyone heard of him about his Finals performance was that he acted like a real Kryptonite who stopped Superman. Perhaps he could tear down the Big Ticket and totally stop him from becoming a nuisance. Lamar Odom, now with less of the pressure and more of the talent, could become the key to the four greatest Laker wins in postseason history.

Los Angeles now moves through a tunnel with flashing lights, a continuous play of light and darkness towards the exit. It's either they take advantage of the light and find their way, meaning solving their problems, leveling the gameplay of the exploding Celtics, or completely succumbing to their weaknesses and becoming lost in figuring out how to break the Green Team. It will take a lot of effort and patience to get there, and will involve several ups and downs that need to be dealt with. And when I say a lot, I mean seven games, forty-eight minutes long of

And I believe that they can get there, that they can redeem themselves and get that back-to-back crown, successfully closing the NBA Season with their glorious title defense. They can give Kobe the fifth ring and move him a step closer to legendary (and probably a new shoe line). They can shut Paul Pierce's mouth off and force him into silence after all those ego-trips he made. They can close the decade with perhaps the greatest win they can have since 2002.

And though it might be hard for me to say it, taking into account the pressure put upon the million true Lakers fans around the globe, I am going to say it.

Lakers in 6.

Beast Wars: The Eastern Conference Finals Preview

2010-05-16T15:51:00.000-07:00

The East teams are proof that the playoffs are way different compared to the regular season. Most importantly, this will be the time that teams have to prove something. It will be their opportunity to make a statement and show the world that they are strong and worthy to grab the trophy. With impressive playoff performances, both the guys of the Boston Celtics and the Orlando Magic are out to exactly instill respect and fear among their opponents. But the Question: who will emerge victorious?

ORLANDO MAGIC (2)

The Magic In: Four and four was what Dwight Howard and his team have delivered into the playoffs so far. After crushing Gerald Wallace and the Charlotte Bobcats, they put to shame the Atlanta Hawks through tough defense. The backcourt combination of Jameer Nelson and Vince Carter froze Joe Johnson and Jamal Crawford, the two top scorers of the Hawks, while Howard and Rashard Lewis took care of Josh Smith and Al Horford. But the Magic is not just about defense; it's about efficient inside and outside scoring as well. The Superman has always been a man of the paint, while Lewis and Carter can provide the treys given the opportunities. Making their shots would then entail a big win for them.

Still, the challenge remains. Can they go for another four wins, now that their opponent is not like the Bobcats and the Hawks? Everyone knows that this stronger Magic team would like to put it even against the Lakers, or possibly own Steve Nash's team. Whether they would battle the Lakers or the Magic, they still have to get past the Boston Celtics to actually be able to battle.

BOSTON CELTICS (3)

The Celtics In: Perhaps Bston's owning of the Cavaliers in six games would soon become a major turning point in the history of the NBA of this decade. The winning trio of Kevin Garnett, Ray Allen, and Paul Pierce, was able to defeat LeBron James and Shaquille O'Neal's squad, who was able to grab the top spot in the Eastern Conference. Those six games became possible also through the help of the supporting cast, which includes Kendrick Perkins, Glen Davis, Rasheed Wallace, and the significant Rajon Rondo, who delivered his best and got a triple-double during their game four win.

But certainly, Orlando is no Cleveland. While LeBron James was the only problem with the Cavaliers, the greens have to deal not only with Howard, but their excellent teamplay and playmaking. Add to that the nagging need to be consistent despite injuries and age wearing them down. Could they get up and do their best to get another four wins, prepared for any contingent plans just in case this series stretches?

What Could Be: As age and energy becomes a problem for the Boston trio, the youth and finesse of Dwight Howard and Jameer Nelson will wear them down and could even beat them to a pulp. Magic in 7.

Down The Wire: The Western Conference Finals Preview

2010-05-16T15:47:00.000-07:00

Starting this Monday, NBA will turn from sports entertainment to a two-week soap opera. The games in the West wouldn't just be about games. In fact, it would be more of bringing together the stories of these teams and the emotions that come with them. Eventually, this fight between the Lakers and the Suns will get more and more intense as the series progress.

LOS ANGELES LAKERS (1)

The Lakers In: Could it be true that the Kobe Bryant of last year has been unleashed and is ready to once again lead the team to another championship? It is, perhaps. Bryant has regained his form despite his finger injury and a few more on the knee, ankle, and the back. He has been an efficient offensive weapon, scoring for more than 30 points on 35 shots or less. Add to that the strong effort of his assisting pilot, Pau Gasol, who, after the game-saving putback against the Thunder, exploded and learned to use his size and jump shooting ability against Utah's big men.

However, teamwork is composed of more than two players, and many of those in Purple and Gold have to really step up. Andrew Bynum, whose knee injury worsened and is now recovering, should learn to deal with pain and play defense. Efficiency and shot selections should be considered for Ron Artest and Shannon Brown, both of them having to go inside to score. Lamar Odom and Derek Fisher has to provide all the assistance that Kobe and Pau needed, most especially in clutch situations. With all these in check, maybe another championship ring won't be too far.

PHOENIX SUNS (3)

The Suns In: Even though that it is obvious that it's possible, everyone was taken aback when the Suns swept the playoff-experienced San Antonio Spurs in four straight games. And mind you, all four games are not just about run-and-gun. Credit must be given to the Suns first five for holding back the Spurs' big three - Tim Duncan, Manu Ginobili, and Tony Parker - and reducing their performance at minimum. Nash was able to create more scoring opportunities for Grant Hill and Jason Richardson, while Amare Stoudemire literally worked his way in and go over Duncan.

Surprisingly, it was the bench was able to provide additional firepower and helped seal the wins for good. Channing Frye, as always, was given the chances to hit shots from beyond the arc and also contributing to the help defense inside. And who would forget Goran Dragic and his four-point play? He was the one who stole game three away from the Spurs through outside scoring, stretching their defense and allowing the post players to penetrate. With these two and the rest of the backups playing alongside their stars, Phoenix could get a shot at owning the Lakers for the third time this decade.

What Could Be: Obviously, the Lakers will still have the natural advantage over the Suns: height. Pau and 'Drew could put a stop on all the Phoenix bigs, while the backcourt combination of Bryant and Artest could lock Nash, Hill, and Richardson down. Phoenix could win through open looks, but the Lakers most probably wouldn't allow that. Lakers in 6.

Exit Polls and Asking Why

2010-05-10T17:14:00.000-07:00

To talk about election after having indelible ink on my right forefinger seems to be useless for others. However, I think that writing about it after the experience of choosing our leaders would help us to reflect upon what we have done this day, after all the lining up, waiting, marking, and inserting our ballots into the PCOS machine, waiting for the "Congratulations" image to appear on the LCD.

So, how did we choose at all? I believe that most of us, especially those who were yuppies like me, took our first (or second, for some) election seriously. We took our pick from top to bottom thinking of the future of a possibly new face of the Filipino society. We chose the people whom we think could bring change, who would learn to move on and work for progress, and would try to work out the mistakes already committed for several years, pushing for the moral and structural reorganization and reorientation that we look forward to.

For those who did not waste your right to vote and thought about things well, then congratulations. You have just taken one of the first small steps toward working for change. A good job, I would say, to you who grew patient enough to wait for hours in the line just to get a few minutes of voting, and a few more hours to wait for the PCOS machine to get to work again.

With this, I hope that the one vote that we have was worth it. I hope that we have looked at the bigger picture before shading the ovals. I hope that we were able to choose someone who knows to provide a direction for the country: a person who would be willing to sacrifice everything, including his very self, for the good of the Filipino people. I hope that we chose someone who is proud enough to lead and initiate, yet humble enough to accept that he also has to listen to those whom he serves. I hope that we chose someone who knows how to both instruct and learn, talk and listen, believe and doubt, question and answer, and, most importantly, lead and serve the best way possible.

On the practical side, I hope we never voted for someone just because our city will benefit for it, or because our family will land a job in the government, or because we can get away with anything that is illegal. I hope we never voted out of fame, influence, or comfort.

I hope that we have chosen the leader who can envision and bring us to what is beyond the horizon.

And from here onwards, it will be our responsibility as members of the Filipino society. Those guys have done mapping out the way they carry our responsibility, and it's about time to execute ours, and it will be possible only if we support them and stand out for them. Our candidate may or may not win, but what makes the difference (and what could make us genuinely democratic) would be our efforts to help our leader. If we learn to stand with him and against him, for him and not for him, for the good and the bad of him, then we can say that we really are Filipinos. Perhaps it is true that in our case, the downfall of our leader is a downfall of the voice of the masses as well, a failure to support and speak out for our leaders. In the end, I hope that we all carry this responsibility well, as genuine Filipino people who know what it means to be accountable to something or somebody.

In the next few days, even weeks, the numbers will decide. So all I ask of you now is to pray that everything will go on as planned, and to dispose ourselves towards openness, acceptance, and cooperation, which would help us develop strong relationships and intellectual dialogues with our present leaders.

Preparing for the Second Set: 2nd Round Playoff Previews

2010-05-04T22:39:00.000-07:00

WESTERN CONFERENCE 1.Los Angeles Lakers (1) vs. Utah Jazz (5)

An NBA season never ends without a battle of two legendary coaches, and I am talking about Phil Jackson and Jerry Sloan here, who have met in various stages in the playoffs since '96. Having taken the long road to the next exit with six games apiece, the Lakers and the Jazz have to prove that they can still hold on.

The Lakers In: The six-game war with Kevin Durant and the Oklahoma City Thunder was like that against Denver last year, with the Lakers finding their form late in the series and working as a complete team. Though the first round has been stamped all over by Kobe, it was through the help of the trifecta of big men: Pau Gasol, Andrew Bynum, and Lamar Odom, who put power and experience over speed and youth. Using this strength together with a few adjustments on the backcourt, the Lakers might have this one easier than we think it is.

The Jazz In: Only a few ever thought that the Utah Jazz, without their main brick wall Andrei Kirilenko, could get past the pesky, Karl-less, Denver Nuggets led by Chauncey Billups and Carmelo Anthony. Their crucial wins could be credited to the leadership of their playmaker Deron Williams, creating scoring opportunities both inside the paint and beyond the arc. Add to that the effort to help out by Paul Millsap and the rest of the bench who carried the burden during crucial stretches. With all these, it seems that the Jazz could grab the ticket to the Western Conference Finals

What Could Be: Aren't we too tired of having Jerry Sloan and Phil Jackson around? Considering their styles and their personnel, this would be a quick battle. Lakers in 6.

2.Phoenix Suns (3) vs. San Antonio Spurs (7)

Having Phoenix and San Antonio around the playoffs kinda became stable during these last few years. Now with various upgrades and adjustments to accommodate their aging key players, we might have something exciting here.

The Suns In: A well-deserved victory against Portland in six games would be proof that Steve Nash, now at thirty-eight, still hasn't lost touch of playing team ball. The execution of the run-and-gun system has been second nature to everyone, even with reserves like Goran Dragic and Lou Amundson. Of course, we have to give the credit to Amare Stoudemire, for making the necessary baskets and constantly hitting on the glass. Overall, as long as the Suns get their fastbreak stretches done, they could win this one.

The Spurs In: Everybody loved the Spurs after thrashing Dallas in six very quick games. And I have to emphasize that it was their speed, despite their age, that helped them against the Mavs, which is generally a half-court team. In fact, the guards who took the effort to run back and forth were the ones responsible for this. Parker, Ginobili, and newcomer George Hill took care of the Dallas backcourt and scored the most crucial baskets, most especially in Game Six. And of course, Tim Duncan took care of the paint job and made sure that they get their inside scores.

What Could Be: This will be a tiring game and it could get longer than everyone expects it to be. But I believe that the "bin there, done that" attitude will prevail in times of pressure. Spurs in 7.
EASTERN CONFERENCE
3.Cleveland Cavaliers (1) vs. Boston Celtics (4)

The battle between the real Beasts of the East, I should say. Both of these teams have worked their way up with much aggression and intimidation on both sides of the court. Surely, this series would be more of a battle between emotions than that of skill.

The Cavs In: LeBron James swept the Bulls in five games, and that, I believe, is a sign of dominance and hunger for a championship. After getting his second-straight MVP honors, he now has to get the big trophy to become a real NBA icon. But the difference between '07 and '09 is the fact that he doesn't need to do this alone. He's got Shaq, Mo Williams, Antawn Jamison, and Zydrunas Ilgauskas by his side. As long as they play their team game, they could get over this quickly and go to the next stop.

The Celtics In: A healthier Garnett could spell out the entire difference in this year's playoffs. The Celtics have shown that they are still a powerful team after ripping out the Heat in five games, tiring out Dwyane Wade through tough D. Plus, they've got the guns both on inside and the outside. While KG and the rest of the bigs take care of the inside, Ray Allen and Paul Pierce can slide in and out and hit their own threes and pull-ups. The next team that they are up against now would be tougher than the first, so unless they tighten their guard and learn to find easy baskets for their top offensive guys, they have to pack their bags and enjoy the summer.

What Could Be: This is going to be a very tough battle, with a lot of whistles and hustle plays along. But in the end, LeBron James would not be denied. Cavs in 7.

4.Orlando Magic (2) vs. Atlanta Hawks (3)

One took the easy route, while the other had a rough ride. It seems that with the way both of these teams played in the first round, this will be an interesting match-up. Talk about being young and fresh… and able to go for the kill when needed.

The Magic In: Nothing like a good victory for Dwight Howard's squad, with a straight sweep against Gerald Wallace and the Bobcats. This is the Magic's statement that they will be back for the NBA Finals, and they've got new guys who could take over: Jason Williams, Matt Barnes, and Vince Carter, who could help the staple of Dwight Howard, Rashard Lewis, and Jameer Nelson throughout. Consistent efforts on the glass and attacking the basket might just be their key to victory.

The Hawks In: Tired but not out, as they say for the Hawks, who just had finished a tight seven-game bout with Brandon Jennings' Bucks. With the core of Atlanta still intact and ready to go, most especially Sixth Man awardee Jamal Crawford, the keys to victory would be allowing their team of shooters to find their spots, with their big men getting back on track with efforts on the board and in the paint. But what has been absent lately was their defense, and if only they could bring it out tightly, then they could close things out.

What Could Be: Hawks have the youth and the legs, but Howard could top them all, backed by his shooting buddies. Magic in 5.

Heartbreaks and Awakenings

2010-05-02T18:24:00.000-07:00

The experience of heartbreak, I believe, is that of the most painful kind of incongruency and understanding, or the lack thereof. It is something that takes man by surprise and pierces his very being in a rather sharp and sudden way, even threatening to tear him apart and destroy him. And mind you, it never goes away without the harshest outcomes and consequences.

The heartbreak is a multi-faceted enigma that strikes all persons involved in various relationships. It comes along with a person sensing the loss of meaning, direction, and significance of a particular relationship, and one is compelled to do something about it. Most of the time, the only inevitable option is to learn to let go and accept the fact that things do not go our own way. It could happen that one's relationship used to be a source of joy and consolation, but as time goes by, it becomes bland, losing its purpose and meaning. Or it could be an acceptance of the fact that a particular relationship would not work both in the present and in the future. More possible, it could be a realization that relationships are not what one's needs are for the moment.

Whatever the reasons are, the bottom line is that a heartbreak strikes upon us, impinges upon a different kind of pain which goes deeper than the usual feelings of misery brought by simple failures and loneliness. This "existential pain" made man feel that there is a large part of himself, his very own existence, that was pulled apart from him. Everything looked like a bad investment, without any good return in it. The heartbreak is, indeed, a death of the self.

It has to be one of the most painful experience, perhaps next to those that rank next to one's own death, but I believe that as bad and painful as it might be, it is inevitably a part of life, a phase towards growing and being. I say that it is a moment of awakening into the fountain that gushes forth which is reality.

The heartbreak is a slap in the face which wakes us up to the bleak complexity of reality. It reminds us that there are no such thing as fairy tale endings, when everything goes well and ends happily ever after, according to our very own terms. It lets us realize that in this world, anything can happen, that this world is composed of a multitude of possibilities, including those that we were not able to think of or plan for.

In a sense, this picture of reality presented to us could become a moment of disappointment, but also a moment of wonder and excitement. It is natural for man to be disappointed with something that he cannot control. But then, I believe that eventually, he would find that this uncertainty would push him to look at what unfolds, to think about them and find out what it means for him.

It is only with the latter that the experience of heartbreak, the feeling of pain and brokenness, will become meaningful and significant. Instead of convincing us that the meaning of our love is a dead end, it instead opens us up not only to various things that could happen and choices that could be made, but also to different meanings of the events that happened in the context of our human existence. When one discovers these things, the pain and brokenness felt becomes more real, more important, more human. In his thinking, man now sees the experience of heartbreak not as a moment of despair, but a moment of exploration, of being available to the reality that unfolds, not being tied to his expectations and plans, but simply letting everything be. He sees it as a moment of greater openness to what is revealed, to what is given before him.

In fact, to a greater extent, the experience of heartbreak allows us to hope, to patiently wait and lean towards the light in this experience of darkness. It allows man to let go and move on, to ask time to take over and change everything, most especially the meaning of these things in his very own existence. The experience of a heartbreak eventually allows us to a greater love, something that is not tied to our own definitions and categories, but is completely about the other. It allows us to reach out to the other in a different yet more meaningful way. It lets us realize that we can love more than we expect ourselves to. It wakes us up to the fact that our loving, even though it comes in various forms and degrees, knows no boundaries, and this becomes true only if we allow it to penetrate our lives.

Indeed, the heartbreak, painful as it may seem, wakes us up. It becomes a moment of awakening not only to Being, but also to our capacity as humans, as beings who are called to love.

In Three Lines: "American Slang" by the Gaslight Anthem

2010-04-27T18:25:00.000-07:00

There is a borderline between the old husky '80's rock songs and indie labels with that same atmosphere, but Gaslight Anthem remains on that line.

More exciting than the previous album, "The '59 Sound."

"Stay Lucky" would be an immediate album favorite.

4.5/5

In Three Lines: "Gloves," Operator Please

2010-04-22T05:58:00.000-07:00

Indie girl rock sounds pretty awesome, kinda like Rediscover on chick mode.

A hyped yet feel-good synth and drum beats make you sway lightly to the music.

Try "Back and Forth" and "Just Kiss."

4.5/5

In Tinseltown, We Could Have A New Lead Singer

2010-04-22T05:42:00.000-07:00

Perhaps, as early as now in the playoff season, it might be a good time for the Los Angeles Lakers to think about their main man. I am not talking about making adjustments for Kobe Bryant. Rather, it's about the team making adjustments for another star.

Yes, Bryant might have been terrific this season, and this even extended into the playoffs. He might have six game-winning shooters, still on the top five to grab Most Valuable Player honors, and even saved his team from a home loss against the Thunder, tallying 39 points while giving OKC guards Russell Westbrook and Thabo Sefolosha a hard time on the Lakers' D. In a way, I agree that Kobe Bryant still has the fuel to lead Los Angeles to the playoffs.

But not as much as I did back in 2009. With a lot of injuries, most especially the avulsion fracture in his right index finger, things might be hard for him to lead the Lakers. To place the burden on this banged up superstar would be, I think, unfair for the team and for himself as well. Unfair for the Lakers, because they still have a lot of stars, healthier than Bryant, who could facilitate and take the right shots, and for him, because to put the burden of leadership to a nearly-disabled role player would not allow him to adjust and improve while in the state of injury. Phil Jackson, in one interview, even highlighted that he either has to shoot less or not shoot at all, considering the state of his injury.

Yes, Mamba should kind of step down and offer the post of top Laker, temporarily, to someone else. And the question would be: who? But then, I believe this is pretty obvious.

We have a leader in the name of Pau Gasol.

This is the Pau Gasol who carried the Lakers to their 10-game winning streak way back in '08 after being shipped from Memphis. He was the one who was branded as soft two years ago, but came back in the Finals and locked Dwight Howard down, largely contributing to the four precious Finals wins. He was the one, along with Andrew Bynum and Lamar Odom, who took the burden of scoring once Kobe Bryant gets cold.

And all these reasons are, I think, enough for him to be called as the new "El Rey" of the Los Angeles Lakers. Gasol has been leading the Lakers in terms of efficiency. I have to admit that my claim does not include the nitty-gritty of statistics, but I believe that hours of watching and reviewing Lakers games could prove my point.

Gasol's build, a seven-foot forward/center who could score and defend from both inside and outside, is just what the triangle offense needs, and, he has been indoctrinated into the system quite quickly, even faster than either Ron Artest or Shaquille O'Neal for that matter. With the ball in his hands within ten-twelve feet of the basket, he is dangerous. He can dish a quick pass to a cutter or to a fellow big man (watch what he and Andrew Bynum does in the early part of the season), back down and force himself down the basket, or simply settle for a "soft" jump shot, which threatens the tight zone defense of the opponent to loosen up and decrease pressure from the paint. When I heard of Gasol complaining to Kobe about getting passes, most of the Lakers fans and analysts, myself included, knew that Pau meant well for the Lakers. It's not about getting the glory; rather, it's about taking the crown.

The glass is where Pau improved this season. You might give him the demerit of being too lazy in boxing out during Lakers losses, but the fact that frequent double-doubles in points and rebounds in most Laker wins would outweigh his mistakes. Together with Bynum in recent winning games with him, they averaged for more than twenty-five boards, and a lot of them on the offensive end, allowing the Lakers to grab second-chance opportunities, which could prove crucial in tight, down-the-wire games. If not for the injuries, Gasol might have been one of the top ten best rebounders for this season. For a championship team, hustling for the boards will be very important, and Gasol provides this boost for the Lakers.

So with this, we could say that he is the guy-to-go. Don't get me wrong, Kobe is still the head of the Lakers team, as he knows how to really motivate and drive, even carry the burden at times, his team to their second title. But then, considering his "incapabilities," he might want to share the responsibility with his Spanish friend. After all, Gasol had taken the harder way before, when he was in Memphis.

A Few Things On Being A Fresh Graduate

2010-04-21T18:46:00.000-07:00

Metaphorically speaking, I have just recovered from the shock of the paradigm shift.

From being a full-time student, I now live the life of an unemployed young man, still searching for a job, and in the past two weeks of trying to cope up with my current situation, I have come to accept some truths in life, which, when dealt with properly, would prove very helpful in surviving the real world. I have written down six very important things that the fresh college grad, like me, needs to know.

1.Structures Are Important

Let's admit it. During our college days, most of us have rigid structures and body clocks within ourselves which help us in coping up with school. Now, when vacation comes up and takes over our time, these structures and clocks lose their function, and we live in a semi-Hedonistic manner, spending our time mostly eating, sleeping and surfing the Internet.

Well, this kind of life would not last long if you are going to face the real world, as it would only result in severe weight increase and a great loss of money. I realized that in order to maintain a sense of balance in one's life, it is important to have a structure and, in some ways, a body clock. Having no job means not really doing anything at all, which, for the responsible one, means trying to wake up early, have light exercise once in a while, and some time to get off one's butt in front of the internet and read a few good books. In summary, having a diet and a regular routine of events would keep you sane and in shape in moments of idleness.

But I don't ask you to go all Kantian here and be totally rigid and strict with yourself. Of course, rules and routines could be occasionally (and I repeat, OCCASIONALLY) broken. So don't hesitate if friends invite you over for food or drinks once in a while… just not too much.

2.You Are Economically Responsible

I woke up a few weeks ago realizing that there is no such thing as a free life in this consumerist world. Life is indeed not all college, which means purchasing things out of your parents' pockets and frequently drinking with your buddies. Eventually, it dawned on me that living each day is worth a few pesos a day, and you wouldn't want to waste it.

That is why I suggest that you keep a tab on everything single penny that you spend: for food, cellphone credits, and all other things that you use your money for. It will be helpful to, in a way, average your expenses per day or per week, and then try to tighten your budget (without being too thrifty). This exercise would help you not only to keep track of how you spend but also to practice managing your resources, considering the fact that your soon-to-be salary would be limited.

3.Have Your Options Ready

We are never sure if the company you want really wants you in return. Well, it's not that you are not good… it's just that your skills don't fit the needs of the company you are applying for. During these times, moments of disappointment would come. But I suggest that one should let it pass by… but have a company or two that you could "lean on" in those times of rejection.

But then, you should learn to choose well. One of my possible bosses told me that the best jobs are not those that pay really high, but those which you would learn to love. Yes, most of us would want to have lots of dough, but then, if it would only bring depression and loneliness, then why would you consume more than eight hours each day for that which you don't really like?

Interest versus financial security. That has always been the conflict in decision making. But then, constant discernment (coupled with right planning) is the key. Think well and decide well.

4.Learn to Learn

Of course, lessons do not entirely end in the classroom. In the process of trying to adjust to this new life, you will learn very important lessons in various situations. Yes, even your evening trips to the malls or at any point outside the house could be a venue for you to learn street smart techniques.

Thus, remember and take not of them, as these will help you in dealing with real life. There are a lot of things that one needs to learn in dealing with life, such as the routes of public transportations, the procedures and useful techniques in acquiring public documents that you need for your job, paying your bills, and, yes, even haggling in cheap stores.

Remember, those that survive in the real world and end up being happy are those who know what kinds of landmines they are stepping on, and how they avoid explosion. Just be ready to learn something new everyday.

5.And finally, always be prepared

Perhaps the most useful tip of all is that you must be ready in various situations at home and in work, most especially those that you have not encountered yet in school. It is in those situations where your acquired skills are put to test, which would tell you not only what you learned but what you still need to learn. They are areas for growth and affirmation of one's own character, and you shouldn't turn away from them or be discouraged by them. C'mon, part of living is correcting and being corrected by events around you.

You could start by learning and remembering the basics of everything, which include going to government institutions to file/apply for public documents, cooking your meals, dealing with your house's electronic stuff, and many other fundamental things needed to live. This could be the best way to conquer boredom and anxiety, which would help one develop openness and patience in everything.

Happy jobhunting, everyone!

The Real Game Begins Here: 2010 Playoffs Preview - Eastern Conference

2010-04-20T03:36:00.001-07:00

Don't ever tell me that the Eastern Conference is playoff fodder. In here lie the teams that know how to bring everything out in the most serious situations. Presenting the eight best teams of the East:

1.Cleveland Cavaliers (1) vs. Chicago Bulls (8)

So you think this could be one-sided? As with last year, think again. This match rains down with stars that are wanting and hungry for a good fight.

The Cavaliers In: Oh, Cleveland, why do I have to mention you without removing (or bleeping) the name LeBron James? But then, accept it or not, James (and his hunger to prove something) is the key to their playoff victory. With a talented supporting cast composed of Shaq, Antawn Jamison, and Big Z, it would be sure that they will bring everything on.

The Bulls In: Derrick Rose, with a stronger squad, I think that you have to have something for this playoff season. Last year, it was the Celtics, and for this year, it's the Cavaliers. Challenges have indeed piled up for the Bulls, so it's a big question mark for these guys (and for Vinnie del Negro's future as well). However, individual strengths flourish like Rose, Kirk Hinrich (whose shooting has become useful lately), and their big man Joakim Noah. So if they have the time and effort to bring everything together as a package, they might get away with this one.

What Could Be: As much as we want Rose to become the underdog star of the show, LeBron's gang might be stronger than expected. Cavaliers in 4.

2.Boston Celtics (4) vs. Miami Heat (5)

Regular season just turns out to be challenging once unexpected and uncontrolled factors come into play. Let's see how these two teams fare up against each other as they deal with their shortcomings.

The Celtics In: The question of the gas tank running out of fuel would be the challenge that the triad of Ray Allen, Paul Pierce, and Kevin Garnett will face. Recently, Boston has lost its power and dominance in the East, and seem to be in the waning years. Can they still hold out for at least one more championship run? Or will they go E and break down?

The Heat In: Dwyane Wade is more than ready for this playoff series. All throughout the season, the Wade's Heat, with the help of big men Michael Beasley and Jermaine O'Neal, have proven themselves as a contender, but breakdowns and badly executed plays brought them down in the rankings. Now placed in the middle of the Conference, they have to show that they can reach the top.

What Could Be: Boston may still have one last wave left, and they could tire out Dwyane Wade and force them home. Celtics in 7.

3.Atlanta Hawks (3) vs. Bucks (6)

Ah, the fountain of youth flowing over and giving us great NBA action. With these two young teams on the way to a seven-game series, expect outstanding athletic plays and intense game-winning shots.

The Hawks In: Atlanta's young guns went on a roll after winning several straight games against top teams, including against L.A. and Orlando (who would forget the Josh Smith last-minute alley oop?). Full of energy and passion, the Hawks are more than prepared to face anyone blocking their path to the Finals, determined to prove that in the course of several years of development, their guys have learned something.

The Bucks In: It's real bad news that their top center Andrew Bogut will not be able to play for the rest of the postseason, and this requires a lot of adjustments. Add to that Michael Redd's lack of presence for most of the season, which really did not help Milwaukee at all save for the development of rookie sensation Brandon Jennings. As usual, fresh skill in the form of BJ has to have some experience backcourt back up through John Salmons and Jerry Stackhouse. Still, this proves that Milwaukee can be an intimidating team

What could be: With an almost all-star line up, the Hawks would get this one, leaving a very tired Brandon Jennings. Hawks in 5.

4.Orlando Magic (2) vs. Charlotte Bobcats (7)

A newcomer and a repeater could make things interesting out in the East. These two teams have set out to prove something, but the question remains: so who goes out victorious?

The Magic in: Just like their Western counterparts the Lakers, Orlando has returned with a few roster modifications. Dwight Howard, Jameer Nelson, and Rashard Lewis are back again, but help came in for them in Jason Williams and, of course, Vince Carter. With a more hyped up offense (and Dwight Howard), it is positive that they will return to the NBA Finals.

The Bobcats In: Talk about success after six years and an ownership by Michael Jordan. Gerald Wallace and the rest of the 'Cats can now drop the "newcomers" label. After six long years of gearing up and developing their team, the Bobcats have now earned a playoff spot under coach Larry Brown. But then, this is no time for celebration, for they have to bring all of their strength and regular season experience to get past this challenge.

What Could Be: A great improvement this season for the Bobcats, but they would not be able to topple down Dwight Howard and the rest of the hungry Magic. Orlando in 5.

The Real Game Begins Here: 2010 Playoffs Preview - Western Conference

2010-04-18T06:46:00.000-07:00

It's a storm out here in the West, for teams will come surging in and bring out the best in them. Let's take a look at the exciting match ups for the top eight teams of the Western Conference.

1.Los Angeles Lakers (1) vs. Oklahoma City Thunder (8)

A great first-round match-up, considering the talent and the intensity of these two teams. But of course, we have nuances for that.

The Lakers In: They have the chemistry and the skill, and now, it's all about form and gameplay. Kobe Bryant and the rest of the Laker team have injuries to deal with , plays to perfect, and a rhythm to develop. What could probably help them in this series are to learn to be less Kobe-centric, to have the other guys do the scoring and to improve their defense.

The Thunder In: Facing the Lakers was something that Kevin Durant and his team could have avoided, but destiny prevailed and gave them a challenge that is compared to running through a brick wall (sorry, another Kobe reference here). The keys to their game could be the way they beat the Lakers during their last meeting: preventing points in the paint and scoring more in it, while occasionally raining down treys to a startled Laker defense.

What Could Be: Experience will still prevail in the midst of confusion, as the team could straighten its path and correct mistakes along the way. KB can take on KD anytime, even with a broken finger. Lakers in 6.

2.Denver Nuggets (4) vs. Utah Jazz (5)

Plethora of skills here, with leadership and direction being the key to this match-up.

The Nuggets In: Even without George Karl, the Denver Nuggets still prove to be dangerous with another "coach" in the court: Chauncey Billups. Mix a dose of Melo, J.R. Smith, and the Birdman, and you will have something to be afraid of on both ends of the floor. Denver just needs a little consistency to get their team straight and fit.

The Jazz In: It seems to be the nth time that Jerry Sloan made a trip to the playoffs with the Utah Jazz, but this time, it's stronger than before. Even without Andre Kirilenko, the Jazz have the trio of Deron Williams, Carlos Boozer, and Mehmet Okur to take down their opponents. Let the plays work out for the three of them, and everything else will be fine.

What Could Be: The Jazz might have the right weapons, but Denver's talents could outscore them. Even without Karl, I believe that the Nuggets could get over this one. Denver in 5.

3.Phoenix Suns (3) vs. Portland Trailblazers (6)

A battle of speed and shooting, the Suns-Blazers game is sure to be a blast. But of course, things have to end and someone has to win.

The Suns In: Phoenix is more intact than ever. With stronger bigs, backed up with the backcourt that is as efficient as ever, Steve Nash and the run-and-gunners could earn their ticket to the next round provided that they put everything in the right places. They ended the season on a roll, and the key to a playoff win is to keep things afloat.

The Blazers in: This would prove to be difficult without Brandon Roy, but the Blazers could get a win through the efforts of everyone else. They've still got LaMarcus Aldridge and Travis Outlaw keeping up with the boards and trying to score both in and out. Steve Blake and Rudy Fernandez can still keep up and get the ball moving. This time, being a Roy-less team is not an option, but a necessity.

What Could Be: The Blazers might have all the potential, but Phoenix has been through a lot of offensive opponents and know what it takes to beat one in five or six games. Two key people could be the problem for the Blazers: Nash and Channing Frye, the center who could slide in and out of the paint. Suns in 5.

4.Dallas Mavericks (2) vs. San Antonio Spurs (7)

Ah, at last. A good Texas showdown early in the playoffs. I reckon this will go down as one of the best seven-game series in NBA History.

The Mavs In: Call it Dallas v2.0 this season, made possible by transactions. Sure, they've let go of Jerry Stackhouse and Josh Howard, their two potent scorers from the bench. But then, they've earned Brendan Haywood and Caron Butler to assist Dirk Nowitzki and Jason Kidd in their duties on both ends of the court. One of the strongest teams this seasons, they could go deeper into the playoff bracket this season, and it's not the only moment for them, and their core players making the right moves in the right places could let them in.

The Spurs In: Manu Ginobili's contrat season was so far his best one in five years, and with Tim Duncan still able to call the shots in critical situations despite playing limited minutes these past games. But with the age factor, those two, together with Tony Parker, would need a lot of help with the young ones: DaJuan Blair, George Hill, and Roger "Minutes" Mason, who should be getting more playing time by now.

What Could Be: In terms of talent, these two teams are equals, but when it goes down to the wire, it would be the strength of the youth which could keep them up. Fatigue may be an issue, so the Mavericks in 7.

Travelogue: Is The Second Time Worth It?

2010-04-13T17:49:00.000-07:00

Yes, I daresay. It really is worth going back to Hong Kong.

The past four days I spent in this little island became a moment for me to take a step back and relax after dealing with the reality of paradigm shift. It was a time for me to have fun and enjoy the little (but, damn, really expensive!) things in life that only come once in a while.

The first day, after arriving at the Hong Kong International Airport, was spent for rest and "feeling" the place. A bus took us to the Rambler Garden Hotel, which is near the Tsing Yi area of Hong Kong. The place where we stayed not that elegant (as they were just offering simple apartment-style rooms) and is far from the city. But then, I did not really care, as long as we have a place to stay and there are definite directions which tell us how to go to the city. As long as we could sleep comfortably, everything's good.

Later that night, we had our dinner at one of the Chinese restaurants along Granville Square, and then proceeded to different sites around Hong Kong, from the underground subway going to Hong Kong island up to The Peak. We also had time to pass by Madame Tussaud's and took pictures with the famous wax figures inside the museum. And then, as we returned to Tsim Sha Tsui, the center of Hong Kong's city life (as I see it), we passed by and took a quick walk at HK's very own Avenue of the Stars, the place of handprints and footprints of various Western and Chinese celebrities and public figures. Of course, as Filipinos, we could not get off a place without having fifty or so pictures at different sites.

Our last stop for the day was at the Ladies' Market at Mong Kok, which is equivalent to our very own Divisoria… just much more expensive. We wandered around its streets and searched for different stuff. Apparently, we were not able to find a nice outlet store that sells ORIGINAL kicks (where our savings were supposed to be used), but we were able to haggle our way to some good finds. My brother Aaron was able to buy good Cobra Starship glasses at about 40 HK dollars (about 280 pesos), while I was able to find a Class A Vans slip-on at only 130 HK dollars (just about 900 pesos). We went back to the Hotel at about 12:30, and rested to prepare for the busy day ahead.

The next morning, we had the second segment of our city tour, where we returned to the Peak and went to Aberdeen, the not-so-fishing town of Hong Kong (because there are no more fishermen in the area, just some stalls and a few Chinese businesses). Going around the city could have felt much better if not for the extremely cold and rainy weather in the city during that day (I only wore a shirt and a pair of shorts, and did I literally froze at the coldness that is 27 degrees Celsius).

During the afternoon, we just had a short stop and immediately boarded our ferry trip to what I dub as "Asia's City of Sin," Macau. We went a look at the different sights, the casinos among many of them (a quick trivia: most of them are owned by China's top businessman, Stanley Ho, who has four wives and eighteen children who will inherit his multi-billion property in the whole of Macau). Among the many sights in this Chinese-Portuguese island was the ruins of the St. Paul Cathedral, which has a museum of sacred art which goes together with the crypt. It was amazing, as I was able to see one of their chalices having bells hanging around it, and a boat that is shaped like a REAL boat, mind you. Oh, by the way, the bones of the Chinese, Korean, and Vietnamese martyrs of Japan were there, preserved.

Our last stop in Macau before going home was the Venetian Hotel, which mirrors that of its Las Vegas franchise, only a bit smaller. Although I did not bet (due to saving money), I checked out the different games in the casino, and boy was I amazed by all of them. Too bad I was not able to take pictures in the casino area itself. We went back home through ferry, just in time to stay awhile at Seven Eleven and then rest.

Third day was the biggest, as we were headed to one of the best amusement parks of Asia: Hong Kong Disneyland. The whole park was available for us for the whole day, but we just had a bad start because of the strong rain, which in turn forced us to purchase adult ponchos for us to roam around.

Nevertheless, the whole day was spent going around, riding and watching the different attractions in this small park. We've had the Golden Mickeys, Philharmagica (the 3D theater), and the Legend of the Lion King, together with other attractions like the River Adventure, Stitch Encounter (interactive simulation at its near-best), and the Buzz Lightyear Star Command (laser shooting, point-racking ride). There were a lot of funny moments, too, like the shows being featured in Cantonese (with subtitles!), and the "It's A Small World After All," of which my brother and I were able to find some racist connotations (or this is just us). Fortunately, we were also able to attend the once-in-a-while events in the park: the 1pm and 330pm parade, and, of course, the fireworks, which closed the day for us.

And finally, there is Friday, our free day as well as our "spend-it-all" day. We went around Kowloon and Granville searching for , what else, cheap kicks! After waiting 'til 12 for the shops to open up, we went straight to the Nike and Adidas outlet stores to check out the cheap kicks, and proceeded to Doublebay to take a look at Puma Suedes and Chuck Taylor Classics. Unfortunately, Ohio, the only store which sells cheap Vans slip-ons and skate shoes, was not open during that day. Nevertheless, I spent my 900 HK dollars quite well, as I was able to buy a Puma NY Style Basket (blue-orange-light green colorway, together with extra laces and velcro), Adidas BTB Print, and an Admiral skate shoe from chapel', with cool colors, mind you. We went back to the hotel at around three in the afternoon, eating lunch and waiting for our flight home.

We were about to take the flight back to Manila at about 9:30pm, but due to air traffic, our flight was moved to 11:45pm, so the airport gave us dinner passes as part of their services (I used up mine on Popeye's Chicken and loaded myself with carbs). As the plane landed on Manila, I closed out another vacation, and prepared myself for the real world that awaits me.

And with all that has happened in Hong Kong, yes, it was worth going again.

We Celebrate The Week of Love

2010-04-03T03:00:00.000-07:00

Before celebrating the Evening Mass (which I would not attend because my mom was still not finished revising her dissertation), here are a few points to think about as we meditate on the Lord's death and Resurrection.

I believe that Holy Week is not just a Catholic celebration. Non-believers might just as well trash all the Catholic traditions that we have, most especially the habit of fasting and abstinence during Good Friday, or the processions that caused traffic all around cities in the Philippines. But I believe that they are missing the point of this celebration, for I see it as a celebration of something universal, that which we can experience as human beings.

What is important is the fact that holy week is a celebration of love. As I have mentioned previously, it is commemorating a love that could be understood only in the eyes of faith, and these three holy days invite us to pause, take a moment, and reflect on this love.

And these things I discovered about loving and giving oneself to a friend.

Love, in fact, is really a very painful reality that we have to face. To love is indeed to literally learn to let go, allow the other to penetrate into your life, and have time take over and make room for growth of both self and the other. And this would be a very painful experience, more like attempting to stretch yourself towards someone who is completely different from you. To love is precisely to fully accept the beloved as another.

Even until death. Jesus accepted us for who we are, sinners yet loved by the Lord. He accepted us as we really are, and He even died and fought for our dignity. And for this, he died for us and saved us.

Are we ready to die and give ourselves for others? Are we ready to accept people for who they are, letting go of our boxes and allowing that other to show himself in time, with us accepting and recognizing them?

Indeed, love transgresses the law of nature and logic. It is the anomaly in the system, yet this anomaly keeps life going, keeps the world turning around. In the end, it is love which kept and is keeping us alive. Yes, love might have the most irrational reasons and ways we would never understand. Yes, love makes us do the things we have thought impossible. But love makes us realize that life is, and will always be a mystery, a colorful blinding light which allows us to, in an ironic manner, see the goodness of everything. It reminds us of how exciting and surprising life is.

Love and death? Heck, it doesn't even end there. The more we give ourselves to others, the more that we understand what life is all about. The more that we give, the more that we appreciate everything as a gift, hence the more that we receive and thank. Indeed, our own experience of loving is our own experience of death and resurrection. It is an experience of new life altogether, as we gain a new and richer idea of who we are and what we could be, as tightly bound to the other, as connected to Him who is the giver of everything.

And may we learn this from the way Jesus loved us and gave His life up for us. Indeed, Christ shed light upon our lives in more ways than possible. An advanced Happy Easter!

Up next, a reflection on the road to Emmaus.

A Few Thoughts on Holy Week

2010-04-01T04:24:00.000-07:00

Because this was the first in four years that I wouldn't be too busy for Holy Week (due to serving at the Cathedral), so I took some time off to write something about this year's holy week.

A few points though, could help.

1. I believe it was timely to reflect on the priesthood for this year's Chrism Mass. Remember that they are alter Christus, reflecting the character of Christ as priest, prophet, and king. Amidst all the present scandals that swarm the Church, do we men of the cloth still allow the people to see Christ in us?

2. Fasting and abstinence seems to be things that are taken too lightly. But then, we have to remember that these are not mere requirements. These are acts of compassion - suffering with. We do this to remember how Christ suffered for us. But more importantly, these two things would teach us to genuinely love - to learn to give up something for another, just as Christ gave His life for us.

3. And most importantly, we remember that the next three days is a celebration of love. We remember how we have been saved by love, to the point that God Himself came down, accepted us for who we are, and died for us on the Cross, that we might share life with Him. Indeed, the greatest love of all, and I believe that all of us ought to respond to this great act of love.

Have a meaningful Holy Week (which looks forward to Easter) everyone.

Shifting Gears (Part 1)

2010-03-29T18:27:00.000-07:00

The night before my graduation, I decided to go blog-hopping, just to have a good read before I go watch the newest episode of "Lost" and then go to sleep. I was able to come across Jessica Mendoza's blog through one of my friends, and I read about her own blog post about graduation.

With that, I was also able to think and ponder about my own graduation, my own way of going through change. And this is an enigmatic feeling for me, something that I cannot really describe fully and say that "this is it." Ironically, I received the fact that I was graduating as a dramatic change in my life, and yet I also felt that it's a single event that passes by, and once it's over, it's done. But digging deeper to the real meaning of this academic ritual, I believe that it is a time of acknowledging yourself that used to be, meeting a new you that is out there, waiting to be restructured.

So with that, I would like to describe this stage of transition, which is my own way of saying goodbye to almost fifteen years of required education and saying welcome to what lies beyond (I'm not saying that I will say goodbye to academics, it's just that I think that it will be different this time around. I am also anticipating my return for theological studies as well.

Yesterday, I went up the stage to receive my college diploma, together with my medals for graduating cum laude, as well as being the program awardee for philosophy. All the jitters, pretty strong heartbeats, and my support team (thank you, philo and hum friends, and a bit of the others too!) applauding me aside, I really saw this as pointing to two specific directions. First, looking back to all the good memories I had in college, all the gifts and blessings that I have received and have put forward, and second, moving on, treasuring and everything and at the same time learning to let go of what has happened, looking beyond what I am today and seeing what I could be.

As I realized, going up to the stage points to various memories on the hill where I stayed for four years.

First, it brought memories on being a college seminarian of San Jose. There goes the seminary structures, where we have to wake up early every day, go to Mass, and return after class for prayers, dinner, recreation, and study periods. It brings me back to the identity that I carry around, as a man of the cloth, with all the surprised reactions ("Magpapari ka ba talaga?!?!?!") and the thoughts, opinions, dispositions, and everything else that comes with the identity of the seminarian. It brought me back to all the fun moments and conflicts that come along with seminary formation - the personalities, the issues, the schedules, the spiritual, academic, communal, and apostolic life that we have lived. And of course, the overall growth that came along it.

And inseparable to that is my second set of memories, as an Atenean. It brought me back to my second family and community - the Philosophy block and the Deparment. It brought me to the discipline that we have altogether learned in doing philosophy and sharing our thoughts with each other, engaging ourselves in conversations (and jokes as well) while everyone passes by saying "Ano raw?" It brought me to the precious moments with my block, the various tambayan stories, the intellectual jokes, the games of bluff and tong-its, and all the times we have spent working and being together (yes, including those Calasanz long tests). It brought me to the times of maturity, of writing and reading philosophical texts and making sense of them at the right times and the right moments, making serious talk about various things such as growing up, facing the future, and even the mushy topics such as love and feelings over bottles of beer. And there are also that of immaturity, where we playfully joke about each other and make simple fun out of ourselves.

Yes, these are the college memories that I will keep, the college, and these are the ones that I'm definitely going to keep. These are the moments that I will not forget, the moments which remind me of the joys and tears, the laughing years of life in the hill.

Let's Call It A Regular Season

2010-03-28T06:44:00.000-07:00

I wrote this just when the Los Angeles Lakers grabbed a win over the Minnesota Timberwolves with a 104-96 card. They have already won five straight and only have less than twenty games remaining to finish the season, with the top spot in the West, four games ahead of the Denver Nuggets, and placing second overall in the league, three games behind the strong Cleveland Cavaliers.

Perhaps after all the struggles and the attempts to stay on top, together with the efforts to keep up the passion of each and every member of the team, it would be fitting to ask one big question that would draw out important answers from the team: "What now?"

Yeah, what now?

What we have here is a banged up combination. Kobe Bryant has been struggling not just with injuries, but also with consistent shooting and overall orchestration. It seems that we have seen the Lakers' all-time scorer struggling with his own self. Last November, he was the Mamba, shooting less and facilitating the plays more (well, save for a few down-to-the-wire games). His evening performances left most of us thinking that the Lakers could indeed get the second crown.

I believe the avulsion fracture incident changed the course of the Lakers. With Kobe unable to score and play well (add to the AF a lot of other injuries that number twenty-four bore - knees, ankle, crotch, back spasms, and occasional sicknesses), the Lakers have lost momentum. KB would want to receive the ball, but would only end up with missed shots. His defense lost its sharpness either, because he tends to fall and limp away (as with what happened to him during the second match of the season against Cleveland). I think that at this point, we could say that Kobe starts to feel not the effects of growing old, but rather, of playing too much when he can rely on his teammates.

And I think that some of the fault in terms of teamplay lies on the rest of the Laker squad. Remember the five games without Kobe? I was comparing a few of the plays in these games with those when Kobe was back. It seems that most of those plays executed very well during the 4-1 run of the Lakers without Kobe were plays where the ball really goes around, with no designated "scorer." To-and-fro, as we would say.

However, the to-and-fro movement of the ball in the Lakers offense turns into "to-Kobe," most especially in tight situations. I have observed that when the shot clock and the game clock strikes only to a few seconds, what everyone wants to do is to dish the ball to Kobe and let him have his crazy shot. In a way, this makes good sense for a Lakers offense that is centered on a prime scorer. However, I do think that the ball has been passed to Kobe too much, and those on the D have already swarmed to him. Perhaps it is time for Kobe to listen what Pau Gasol told the media a few days ago, that he, or any other Laker player who is open and could score, has to receive a dish and score an extra basket. Remember that the ideal Lakers team is the non-Kobe-centric, that is, that the offense should freely flow and provide opportunities for easy baskets (not necessarily Kobe).

With that, I think that the issue with the plays now is the fact that Kobe should shoot less and pass more. Besides the Pau Gasol complaint which could attest to that, most of Lakers sports analysts focus on the relationship of the win and the field goal efficiency rating of the Lakers as a team and the number of times that Kobe shoots the ball as well as his percentage. Lo and behold, they have discovered that, in recent games, most if not all the wins of the Lakers were games where Kobe dished more than 3 assists and shot the ball for 20 or less times. The worst shooting nights of Kobe were, guess what, the nights against Charlotte and Orlando, two of the three games where they lost straight. Now, does it say something about the Lakers offense?

Again, I think it does. It reflects, on the bright side, the desire of Kobe to uplift the spirits of the already-bored Lakers who wants to get everything over with during the playoffs. Los Angeles as a team should know better than giving up leads or becoming sloppy in the fourth quarter after a 30-point game. Everyone has to remain on Overdrive and kill the opponent. So I believe that yes, it is a good thing that Kobe has to be there to hit the shots and provide the boost for this tired team. It is good that Kobe gets a hand on the shots that matter when they are losing. It is good that Kobe is there to catch his team and cover their loopholes. It is good that Kobe has to be a real Laker for the whole Lakers team.

But on the other side, the question regarding the necessity for Kobe to take the shots remain. The fact that Kobe HAS to take these last minute shots indicates that the Lakers as a team does not perform that well. This somehow suggests that they can't seal good victories as early as the half or before the fourth period. This suggests that, as previously mentioned, that they have to add fuel to the fire and maximize their capability as a team if they really want to go into the inner brackets of the playoffs as a team to be feared by everyone. I believe that the Lakers will be at their best when Kobe and Pau Gasol rests on the fourth period and are incredibly happy with how the team is performing, with the bench and the rest of the squad stretching their lead.

Apparently, in these last few games, it has never (or has rarely, if ever) happened. Are we saying that the Purple and Gold has succumbed to being lax on the final stretch? I have to give them credit to the well-fought games, despite of being branded as bad and mediocre. They have been through a plague of injuries and a rough schedule after their comfortable December set of games, coupled with the fact that all of the teams play against them with an intensity like that of the playoff games (and believe me, they cost a terrible lot of energy). And yet they have been playing well, with a pretty good win-loss record that even Denver or Dallas, the two and three specifically, could not match. The Lakers have indeed worked hard to stay at the top and bid for another title. But then, there are traces of laxity: an inefficient bench production, less action from those not named "Kobe Bryant," and the bigs moving and posting less and becoming soft all the more. These, I think, are the loopholes that become hindrances to big wins, problems that should be given solutions before playoffs come.

On a general note, if the Lakers continue to play the way they are right now, it might as well close this discussion and declare Cleveland the champions of 2010. LeBron James and the rest of the Cavs are hungry for a championship, and with the way they are playing right now, it seems that they could wear down any team that they will face in April and grab the trophy. But then, I still believe that the Lakers can make up for their lapses. It's never too late for a wake up call. I believe that the Lakers are still the best playoff team, having both skill and experience to go back-to-back (and a hungry Ron Artest to back that up).

So what to do right now, in these last twelve games of the regular season? I believe that it is now time to practice for the playoffs. They have to keep the flame alive and refuse to let go of the opponent. They have to have more dynamic plays, less of the "square offense" (Kobe driving to the lane while everyone else watches) and more of the efficient triangle offense (see more of Kobe and Ronron playing the post and the bigs moving around to get open shots), more efficient, high-percentage shots, and less Kobe-centricity.

And of course, the defense. It counts. Work all that well, and we have a championship team who will open the decade with a back-to-back championship.

The New Patrick Stump

2010-03-24T00:03:00.000-07:00

From the scene kid of Fall Out Boy:

To this new clean cut guy of, umm, Fall Out Boy?

And does this mean that he's going to make some fresh material that is not so Fall Out Boy?

Bieber Bashing On The Way

2010-03-21T23:03:00.000-07:00

"From The Earth To The Moon"

2010-03-21T01:01:00.000-07:00

I consider this not only one of the earliest science fiction novels (in its plain sense), but also one which exhibits a setting which could be considered as a prototype of the steam-punk genre that we know today.

With all the equipment that they need, a Gun Club from the United States of America tried to construct a large cannon which they believe could reach the moon. Tings got more complicated… and eventually more exciting, when a Frenchman insisted on going inside the cannonball to be the first man on the moon.

I would have to say that this is an interesting JV read, along the lines of 20000 Leagues Under The Sea, an exploration of things that could be possible when pursued, which could be done when dreamed of and executed well.

And probably, we would end up as a moon-satellite had everything been done eighty years earlier.

The New "We Are The World"

2010-03-17T02:11:00.000-07:00

It was only now that I was able to watch in MTV Asia the remake of "We Are The World," as a tribute to the victims and volunteers of the Haiti earthquake.

Those featured in the video (courtesy of wikipedia) are:
-Justin Bieber (why does this scenester-wannabe-who-sings-rap kid show up?)
-Nicole Scherzinger
-Jennifer Hudson
-Jennifer Nettles
-Josh Groban
-Tony Bennett
-Mary J. Blige
-A footage of MJ
-Janet Jackson
-Barbra Streisand
-Miley Cyrus (seriously.)
-Enrique Iglesias
-Jamie Foxx
-Wyclef Jean
-Adam Levine
-Pink
-BeBe Winans
-Usher
-Celine Dion
-Orianthi (the guitar goddess, if you've seen "This Is It")
-Fergie
-Nick Jonas (another one?!)
-Toni Braxton
-Mary Mary
-Isaac Salde
-Lil' Wayne (surprising that Weezy is here)
-Santana
-Akon
-T-Pain
-LL Cool J, Will.i.am, Snoopp Dogg, Busta Rhymes, Swizz Beatz, and Iyaz for the rap part
-Kanye West

and a whole lot of those on the background.

My Message As Samahan sa Pilosopiya Core

2010-03-17T02:05:00.000-07:00

This message is originally meant to advertise the upcoming release of the Pilosopo Tasyo and the Seniors' Party, where everyone is invited to attend. But then, after reading Doc Guss's message to the seniors, it seems fitting to leave also a message from the outgoing senior core members of the Samahan sa Pilosopiya, your home organization. So, this will serve as an (unofficial) follow up to what our department chair said.

Doc Guss has pretty much said everything, reminding us who we ought to be and what we ought to do in this bleak world filled with problems and crises we have barely experienced or encountered in our four years of stay in the Ateneo. Indeed, now is the time to face and catch up with reality after being nursed and formed in this institution. It appears that the days of frequent partying and aimless gazing is over, and it is time to really work hard and be mature citizens of this country (okay, I admit that there is still area for party and drinks, but let's work on the necessary things first). It's time for us now to be real grown-ups, as men and women ready to devote our lives to love and service, to learn to see and act upon everything both with wonder and passion, as well as with the sense of urgency and responsibility that is demanded of us.

Fellows, it's time for us to become true beacons of hope, as Doc Guss said. It is time for us to show the world that we can do something, that we can change ourselves and then change this world by getting out of our comfort zones, re-thinking things, and changing our ways. It is time for us to show the world that our generation knows something more than lying on the couch and surfing the net. It is time for us to let everyone know that we can move. We are more than what they think us to be: either as social critics who are a threat to the order of institutions whilst name-dropping philosophers and quoting their books to show our expertise, or, for those who are in the Church, as people who pray without acting while going around condemning people because we don't share the same stands as we do (I know you get my drift here). I believe that after our four years of philosophy, we are people who can strive for reform, love the poor, engage institutions and groups in non-violent and mind-opening conversations, and, most important of all, be real human beings towards other human beings.

And I think that we could start with gratitude, to appreciate how these four years of study made us who we are. And this gratitude is the kind that is not done by merely saying "thank you" and then walking away. Rather, it is the kind that allows us to realize that each and every person, thing, or event which have become a part of our own selves have done so much for us, and we have to pay back, or to put it in a more proper way, pay everything forward.

To my fellow seniors, I ask you to do our simple acts of gratitude by starting to remember. I ask you, never forget. Let us never forget the times when we worked together to finish those which were asked of us. Let us never forget the responsibility and accountability that we have towards one another, that which we learned only in those times when we have been together. Let us never forget those times when we responded, as one and in our own unique ways, the call to reach out and be a person for others (as exemplified by our own experiences during Ondoy, Pepeng, and the Maguindanao massacres). Let us never forget our discussions which forced us to think and engage others in conversation. Let us never forget our philosophical adventure which I believe was quite worthwhile for all of us. And even though most of us have erased in our hard drives our reviewer for our comprehensive exam and, for some, notes for theses, let us never forget, most of all, the discipline we have acquired from years of studying philosophy, the values that we have learned along the way, and most of all, the sense of wonder which urges us to search for evidence (quoting Dr. Angeles here) which grants us access to truths which seem to be obliterated and covered up by the present conditions of our world. I believe that it is only in remembering these things that we learn to move forward and mature.

And to those who are still trudging the path to the end, we hope that you learn something from us and our adventures. Learn from our actions, from our successes and failures, from our achievements and mistakes, from our selflessness and selfishness, from each and every thing. But of course, always do the right thing, that which is asked of you.

Making The Most

2010-03-15T17:04:00.000-07:00

Yeah... gotta start lookin at the hand of the time we've been given here this is all we got and we gotta start pickin it every second counts on a clock that's tickin' gotta live like we're dying We only got 86 400 seconds in a day to turn it all around or throw it all away we gotta tell 'em that we love 'em while we got the chance to say gotta live like we're dying

-Kris Allen, "Live Like We're Dying"

In these last moments that count where one could be able to look back and see not just the big picture and the long road where one walks, but the individual moments as well. It is in those single, particular memorable moments that most of the time, we are drawn to stop and think about our life. And from there, questions that we have been asking repeatedly emerge in a new light: Who Am I ? What Am I Doing In Here? Where Am I Headed To?

But sometimes, these moments slip as if they were not at all important for us. Living in a world where everything seems to suddenly come and go, with one thing proceeding after another in a short span of time, it really is hard to notice and gaze at the different events in our lives. Writer Ursula K. Le Guin spoke of the world as in heat, in a high state of entropy, that everything is unstable and could not be noticed. Alvin Toffler would say that we are always in a "future shock," and the present seems to be absent in every moment of life.

With these bleak pictures of the world, is there a possibility of slowing down and taking a look at things, gazing at them and dwelling on the meaning of these things? I believe there is, and what is needed for us is to only look.

I believe that the greatest skill in life that one has to have is the ability to look and listen, and it is when he feels becoming more human than he could ever think of. It is then that he is able to look at things and how they are related to his own search for meaning. It is only in the act of looking that he is able to come up with insights, with wonderful and meaningful thoughts about himself and the world he lives in.

But more than that, it is in gazing that one appreciates time, that it is not just made up of fragments or chunks of moments, but a continuous flow of things in their appearance and in their flourishing. It is in gazing and thinking about things that we appreciate the fact that despite the swiftness and brevity of moments, it is nothing but very rich with meaning and significance.

And with that, we hope that we live like we're dying, that we learn to treasure each and every moment in our lives, to see them as grace, as gifts that we continue to receive in every moment that we live, gifts that ask us to respond by seizing the moment, doing the best that we can. Each and every human act well thought of in various moments of one's life are acts of gratitude towards the Giver.

Thus, it is possible to stop for a while, take a break, and appreciate life as it unfolds before us. But one thing we must not forget is to seize the moment and make full use of it. Never take things for granted, and live life as if it is your last breath.

You live what anybody gets… You got a lifetime
-Death, "The Sandman" Series

When Rock Takes Its Revenge... and Forces Us To Wonder

2010-03-14T18:48:00.000-07:00

One of the memorable days I had during college was one epistemology class when we discussed the difference between classical music and rock music. In class, it was mentioned that it is the former which allows us to dwell and linger on things, for it is that which hides emotions, meanings, and beauty waiting to be discovered. On the other hand, the latter is quite explicit, saying everything in the open, without any room for the listener to dwell on and find something still not seen. In short, rock music has exposed everything, and there is nothing more to do except to receive it without any effort at all.

Not quite, I think. I am a listener of rock music ever since I heard the radio playing Eraserheads and, later on, Nirvana, and I think that rock music has that same depth as that of classical music, a kind of depth which could only be perceived by those who truly listen to it.

It might seem a given that rock music already brought things out in the open, and that classical music, having no lyrics, gives room for dwelling and reflecting. Rock music might have brought out all the secrets of its music with its hard beats and guitar solos, while classical music delivers a kind of serenity that keeps a deep secret within itself. Rock music might have been made for partying and thrashing around, while classical music is for the quietness and serenity of the soul. But I cannot agree to the claim that rock music does not allow one to dwell and linger on things contrary to classical music. In this case, I think that I have to defend rock in these aspects.

Rock music might have the words which let the music speak for itself, but I believe that it does not deny the fact that the more it shows, the more it hides. I think that it is in lyrics where music reveals something, and at the same time, chooses to not reveal something and keep something hidden. Lyrics in fact give shape to music, inviting the listener to not just lend an ear but also lend one's mind and eventually one's being in the course of the music. More than that, the words not only point to the song, but also point back to the listener. I don't know if some of us experience this, but I believe that those who grew up in the nineties and are currently facing the issues of young adulthood would find it easy to listen to Kurt Cobain and the rest of Nirvana and, say, Get Up Kids or Angels & Airwaves. And I believe that it is such because these songs send a message which tells something about our own state of existence and how we deal with life situations. It is in the way that we interpret the lyrics that the song becomes more alive, where they will choose to reveal itself more fully to the listener, when "Smells Like Teen Spirit" and "Hey Jealousy" become part of life as fragments of it, as stories within our own stories, poems within our own poems of life.

But despite the richness of rock music in lyrics, it still does not reveal everything. In fact, more is revealed when the lyrics fall silent and the instrumentals take over. Think of classical music after five or so centuries, and what you get are those drumbeats that send us partying (like how Travis Barker, the best drummer of our generation, keeps everything about pop-punk alive and kicking) and the best guitar riffs and solos in the world. One of the best interludes that I was able to listen to was that of Avenged Sevenfold's, in the song "The Beast and the Harlot," and once I heard it, the moment of wonder and amazement wells up within me. It brings my imagination to a concert scene, when one would imagine being on the drums or on the guitar and doing that riff, followed by jumping and moshing around. Indeed, in this moment, I believed that it is when we stand in awe and wonder, to stare into the wild and learn to think of it as something that reveals yet hides something. It invites us to explore as we let our passion for sound burn within us.

And does rock music not do this for you?

The Last-ditched Efforts

2010-03-07T22:54:00.000-08:00

Perhaps, there was nothing exciting about it, but the waves of infatuation still ride over in the last few days. With that, I felt the need to do something with it, and that is to write a last letter for her (whether or not she was able to read this stuff, it doesn't matter), and since things were spilled over, there will be nothing gained, nothing lost with this.

And with this, here it goes:

Everything seemed to be awkward. From start to end, I believe it has always been.

But I count the moments as something worth remembering, for they are moments which seem to be something that is out of the ordinary. For they are moments which tell me that I am looking for people, for friends to be like you in one way or another, but not quite like you. These are moments which tell me that being friends wouldn't be that much bad. It even makes me feel happy.

And I am thankful for those moments, for which I see everything as a gift from you, from me, for you, for me.

Secrets have spilled, things have been revealed. I know that because there is nothing more to hide, liking you has not been that exciting as it was. But then, I'm glad we have become friends in some ways.

I may have not joined you in the ride. I might have stayed in the back and became contented with seeing you from afar. But it has been worthwhile.

And I did not write this just to end things. It may in fact be just starting.

It Is The Dance That Keeps The Belief Alive

2010-03-06T17:32:00.000-08:00

It was in these rare moments that I really experience being silenced by art, not just because it was something that is marvelous in itself, outside myself, but also because it penetrates the self, bringing back many good thoughts and memories.

Last Friday, I was able to watch CREDO, the year ender of the Company of Ateneo Dancers (CADs), and I really admit that after all the performances, I was really left speechless, amazed by how the group was able to do all of this, both entertaining and dazzling everyone and leaving a message that is very timely and striking.

I admit that because of the numerous performances, I could not give a highlight of the whole presentation. Nevertheless, I have some which I could consider as the best performances of the night, and these include:

1.The "toy house / dream land" ballet number, accompanied by the String Quartet rendition of "Sugar We're Going Down."
2.Of course, I cannot remove from my list their creative repeat of their Skechers number (which I was not able to watch in exchange for pigging out at Shakey's two months ago).
3.The Gospel-themed dance number was a win for me. I never imagined that one could do a dance number on salvation with such life.
-But I could not also forget the various hyped up numbers earlier, most especially the "Glee" medley. Oh, and the moves. Yes, the moves which made my head and arms move, whilst trying to put each and every one of them in my head, with the hopes of being able to apply these in our further presentations.

And I think that everything I have witnessed during the night stirred up something within me. It's not just about being fascinated with the moves, but everything somehow reminded me of my personal Credo, a full belief and acceptance of what I am. The dance reminds me of my own personal dance, and I'm not talking about some kind of existential metaphor to describe my life. Yes, I did learn to dance when I was in 2nd year high school, and I admit that when I started to learn the art, I never stopped riding the beat.

I might have done the switch from dancing to playing the drums and becoming a part of a band, but I never totally said "no" to dancing. Here in the college seminary, where presentations are a must, I was still able to love the dance, to appreciate the music and swing to the beat, counting from one to eight (heck, I was member of the San Jose Mananayaw during my first two years, before it became exclusive to the theology community). I even had one P.E. class which I took under the Modern Jazz class (but is actually Intermediate Street/Hip-Hop), and it was there that I was able to confirm that I still have that spunk and energy to be able to dance, just when I thought that I have lost the appreciation for it. In fact, I still remember that the first music I danced to was the mash-up of "Girlfriend" (N'Sync ft. Nelly) and a few Missy Elliot songs. The last one, as I remember, was my own mix of a few famous R&B songs.

Until now, I never failed to appreciate dancing as part of myself. I might not have joined the most recent dance practice (since for this year, all program presentations were devoted to singing) or made moves for the community since the 11th Bukluran (where the community joined a Marian dance contest, and I was assigned to do the street part). I could say that only two or three percent of my skills were devoted to dance. But then, I could not deny the fact that when I play the music, I go with its flow: banging my head, bending my legs, swinging my arms, acting as if I was playing the drums or strumming the riffs in a major concert. That, my friends, is what I call the dance of life. It is what I cannot remove myself from. It was something that I started which never seemed to end.

And with dancing, I learned two important, inseparable lessons: bringing out everything and setting one's own spirit free, flowing with the music, swaying to the rhythm of life, eventually surrendering oneself with much gratitude. And this is where the existential part will kick in (of course).

Life is just one big dance. You learn the music, do the basic grooves, time your moves and create them, and for a moment or two, one does an incredible feat that would drive the audience wild in amazement and fascination. But in the end, it's not about the wild moves or the type of dance; instead, it is all about giving everything. Whether dancing comes in sets of eight-counts (what I can do as far), or a damn good headspin, what boils down in the end is the total giving of oneself to the music, of letting oneself be, being aware of the music and moving with it. It is giving one's whole mind, body, and heart in hitting the dance floor and executing the moves as good as you can. True living, I believe, doesn't really revolve around the methods of survival or the amounts of success and failures. Instead, its true measure is how much of the self has been given and delivered to the world, the ability to give the whole self in the process of living. In the end, it is the sacrifice of the self that counts, the courage to lose oneself in order to gain this world, to gracefully dance with the music.

Thus, life as a dance is always an endless giving, mustering all our efforts to devote ourselves to those who are other than us, to join them in swinging and stomping in the beat of life. It springs forth from our own determination to go with the flow of music and groove as it were. However, we realize that this effortful act of dancing becomes an act of renouncing oneself, presenting oneself to the music. As one continues to dance, one realizes that even the determination, the passion, and the ability to dance are gifts, something that has been given to us as those who are determined to renounce the self by dancing. In the end, dance shows us that our very own selves, together with our fellow dancers, are gifts to each other, hoping that we may receive each other by continuously moving as one and keeping up the energy as one dance troupe. In the end, the act of dancing becomes an act of gratitude to the music and to the other, a moment of receiving and becoming grateful of the grace that came in one's life as the music that pushes us to go on.

With this in mind, it is true, then, that in dance, our whole being is offered and delivered. We are now called to never stop dancing, to let ourselves respond to the beat of life and go with the flow of the music.

Let's Start With The Last Things

2010-03-02T23:28:00.001-08:00

It always feels so good if you have good endings in your life. It's more like hitting the game-winning shot that brought the game to a close, and you just have to spread your hands in victory and embrace your teammates.

But it's not just that single shot. It’s not even about the question whether it came in or not. In fact, the whole game's worth it. (Besides, we haven't reached the ending yet, for we still have the denoument to deal with)

I started the semester with a lot of hope and determination to make these last moments count. Everyone's goal is to graduate, but my goal is to do my best and graduate with glory (yes, I admit that). However, this includes making the most out of my last days both here in the seminary and in the university. It involves being involved in whatever we do, making sure that what we bring with us are good memories which we could go back to.

And good they were, as I believe. I had one great academic rollercoaster ride, with all the subjects that I took for my last semester in college life. There was Epistemology with Dr. Tonette Angeles, Philosophy of Religion with Mr. Eddieboy Calasanz, and of course Contemporary Philosophy with the idol of the batch, Dr. Ramon Reyes, and add to that the Catholic Social Vision and, of course, the dreaded end of the journey in philosophy (at least for the Pre-Divinity majors): the synthesis paper and the 45-minute long oral comprehensive exams.

And I believe that after looking back at the last four significant months of my college life, I could say that I was able to go through the final hurdle and execute the last great play. I had to admit that this last four months has been a season of toil and hard work, a kind of striving that is not just for the self, but also for one's own vocation, one's own community, and one's own family. A few weeks ago I had a chat with one of my good college friends, and we had this discussion over making it in the Latin honor roll. With that, I was able to realize that when I first embarked on this journey, I though that everything was for my own self - the everyday school works, community roles, and building bonds with different people. I thought that these would just be one of the trophies that I could carry home and be proud of.

But as the years went by - seminary life became more about passion and commitment, studies and philosophy turned into an intellectual adventure, and friends became indispensible fragments of the self, I figured out that everything was not about just charging your ego with millions of credentials and a lot of titles. Rather, it is about building networks, finding the meaning of one's life as being in various communities where one belongs to. It is indeed true that the meaning of one's life is found only in relation to other people, of respecting them who we are and being with them as both of you grow in time.

And going back to that discussion, I think I had already found the reason for all striving. It's not just about myself. Rather, it is about the Church that I want to serve, the family that loved me for who I am, the community with whom I spent more than three-fourths of my weeks, months, and years, the friends and blockmates who shared not just stories, but more importantly memories with me. All of who I am, my eight years of seminary formation, my efforts to graduate cum laude, and my different leadership roles, are for them, to give back with gratitude what has been given to me.

And it is in this particular lens that I want to see these last four months as one of the most important and valuable moments of my life. It is not just about the various A's and B+'s which came with countless hours of trying to put my ass in place and study, the positions I took in San Jose Seminary and in the Ateneo which people recognized with much respect, or the random pursuits (including this blog) that I thought of trying. Rather, it's more about the sharing of what all of us have - the reviewers, stories, scores, experiences, basketball games, drinking sessions, tambay moments, recreations, prayers, chant classes and music practices, night outs, and everything else that involves strengthening bonds not just with the self but also with others, that made this last four months worthwhile. These were the very moments wherein I was reminded of the most important things in life as well as the way they point to my vocation, to what I should really be. These were the last four months where I was able to wake up to the truth of who I really am and to become thankful for it.

They say that things get mushy and worth remembering only in the last days. And I think that it is true, but more than that, I think that these last four months is just a way to remember that the whole four years was worth it. Yes, I might have done a lot of mistakes and blunders, and there were a lot of good things that I missed.

But then, with all that has transpired, I can say that my life as a college seminarian is a basketball game worth playing. Maybe I would come out a winner or a loser by the time March kicks in… but it was worth it, no regrets or anything.

And this is just the start of my many goodbyes.

Opening The Wounds

2010-03-02T18:46:00.000-08:00

I'm a circle incomplete, I'm a heart that barely beats All the memories stay forever like tattoos I'm a star without a sky, I'm hello with no goodbye I'm the dreams we had that never will come true That's me with no you
-Bowling For Soup, "Me With No You"

A Spilled Notion

Of all the definitions of love that the pages of history and literature has to offer, it seems that we are faced with a multitude of names that do not remain on the nominal level, to mere words that point to one and the same something. It is not about just listing down "love is this" and "love is that" as if they do not really mean anything. With each signification of what love is, one is geared towards a kind of questioning, that which resounds from each and every one of these pieces. "How do I love?"

Eventually, the common denominator that seemed to, in a way, encapsulate the multitude of these significations is that love as "radical alterity." To see love as this is to not give love a definite, closed description, that which could immediately unite all experience one may call as a totalized experience of loving. Rather, it has to be seen as a breaking apart of love, of reminding us of its real meaning and significance. Indeed, what it means to love is something that is, in experience, ungraspable. It spills over, from one simple moment to a whole life, together with the world it brings, in general.

Though it may shed us some light about what love is, we can't still discard the question of the how. For in asking this, we can't seem to escape the issue of starting it and bringing it to fullness. As a person who loves, how do we look at love and loving? How do we open ourselves to love? More precisely, how do we live in love?

These questions throw us back to a perennial problem that has disturbed the history of thought, and life as well, for centuries, until those who gained the key insight was able to figure things out and, in some ways, tried to fix things. "How can the subject know the object?" This has been the problematic, the enigma of philosophers of decades past. It is nevertheless an epistemological problem, but then, since knowledge and understanding is part of our humanity, this question cannot but penetrate our selves and also become spilled over in our life. Now we ask, "how does the lover love the beloved?"

And we stumble upon the notion of the modern philosophy that was too much concerned with the "I."

I Love Because I Can

To cut a long (and perhaps tragic) story short, the Moderns placed the self, an individual thinking substance separate from the world, as the foundation of all knowing and experiencing. As a consequence, they pictured reality as the way man would like to construct it. Thus, all that is experienced is only possible as such if and only if man organized everything and made sense of it. The human mind should learn how to arrange the manifold of sensibilities before him, and therefore judges it as real or not, meaningful or not, depending on his own definitions of meaning and organization.

Perhaps being too much, but more or less, this is the image of how a separate thinking mind sees everything. Perhaps, we could say that in an extent, everything is as he pleases. Even science of this time would even go so far as to say that those that did not fit have to be discarded and regarded not as an important piece of information but just an anomaly that one has to ignore.

And it is never far from a heart that separates from itself, a kind of loving that is grounded on a false belief that one loves primarily because one is able to love in his own way. As a dire consequence, one would only love the beloved in such a way that it becomes favorable to the lover. There would be no such thing as a complete acceptance, for the lover would only accept certain images, aspects, or parts of the beloved. The rest of the beloved's being would be taken merely as accidental and need not be paid attention or accepted.

In this idolatrous form of loving, it seems that fragments of the beloved, and not the beloved herself, are accepted and loved. In the end, "loving" just becomes a matter of convenience and self-satisfaction. It is a selfish confinement of the other, boxing her according to my own categories and expectations, because it is only in this way that I experience her as someone I love. If times change and my beloved would change, then perhaps it would just be proper to cut our ties and call it quits. After all, these changes would surely lead to a change in our relationship, and thing would not be the way they were before. Thus, it would be the easier way out to escape future pain rather than endure it, since it guarantees the safety of the self.

But then, would that be loving? To do so would be to see love as an accessory in our life that we can live without, as an activity among others. It is first and foremost something that I starts from myself and ends with myself, and if I am not happy with it, I could just learn to get by without it. If the feelings and the sense of security and happiness is gone, then so is love.

Would we just be content with it being a mere creation of the self, an attempt to construct a bridge to the other, believing that man has reached his fellow, but what he only did was to draw a definite picture of the other side? Where is the beloved in this picture?

I Love From Being Loved

Love, then, does not start with "I love." It cannot be called genuine love if the whole experience of love is presumed to start with an individual self, an ego which has deceived itself of already reaching out to others through his conceptions of the other. To start with this is to also end up to where it started.

Where could it be found, then? The only option (and the necessary one at that) starts with a "we," expressing the fact that I am already connected to others beyond myself, and it is only through these connections that I learn to fully connect, to fully love the beloved as she is.

A very important thing that should not be missed is the fact that the truest form of "we" is in two parts: first, "I am loved," and the second, "I am towards love," and it is from this where we will start. In this understanding, to love then is to always give back, to reciprocate, for one started already as someone who has received love. Before one decides to love, he has first and foremost received love from another. In fact, the ability to love is something that the person receives as a loved individual. I learn how to give myself to another because I have already known and appreciated what it feels like to be given, to be cared of, and to be loved. It is from these experience of receiving that I learn and start to give myself to love, to surrender myself completely to the other.

So instead of a self that is separated from the world, love now starts as being fundamentally connected to the other, being loved already. We are already thrown into a world where we cannot get rid of those that are beyond ourselves. We might prefer ignoring them and continuing to exist as if there are people who are not with us, but we cannot deny their presence, their very being which continues to affect us and influence us as we continue to live in this earth. Most of those around you are the persons who form who you are, whether they know it or not, even coming up with things that are part of your very self. They are those who continue to affirm you that you are that kind of person, living in this kind of community, having these particular roots, principles, and goals. This means that who I am is made up my connections with the other, and I could not get rid of it, for to do such is to rid myself of who I am. Thus, we could say that my identity is made up of connections, and I believe that they are not just factual and influential connections. These are connections made by the various degrees of love, of belonging and being accepted in a certain community. The strength and influence of others in you determine the intensity and impact of the love of the other towards the self. We even have to take note that these influences are forged out of great love and appreciation for who we are and who we might be.

Thus, my very existence is a product of love, not just in a biological sense, but also in an existential one. I cannot be who I am without the "energy" of love surrounding me and shaping me each and every day of my life. And because love goes freely within me, it is my duty to let it flow as it is, to prevent it from freezing and going hard and instead learn to pass it on. Not only will it be a way of existing as to who I really am as a human being who is always towards outside himself, but in this very existence I learn how to give thanks: not just to those who loved you, but to whom the energy of love springs forth and returns, Love Himself.

And to exist as love is to accept one's connection with the other, to strengthen it by giving our whole selves to the other, to let the energy of love not only flow from one being to another but also let it totally bind the self to the other. This is where the second sense of "we" comes out: "I am towards love." My self is primarily open towards the other, towards my beloved, existing as an open human being, complete in itself, yet paradoxically lacking, needing the presence of someone genuinely other for my existence to be truly affirmed and taken care of. As I discover myself to be a complete human being, I find that I do need the other, for me to live as a true and complete human being.

And from this seemingly paradoxical experience, I come to understand, that I exist as a wounded person, always open towards giving and receiving from the other, always open to love, always in love.

Towards the Mystery of the Other

To say that man is fundamentally in love is to cease trudging the long road towards knowing how the lover loves the beloved. We stop asking this by accepting the fact that primarily, man is already connected to the other, towards the beloved, towards love itself. Primarily, his identity, his very being springs forth from love and its various degrees - from mere recognition to devotion and commitment made by the other. He then finds meaning and direction in his existence only in loving, in knowing and recognizing the presence of his beloved, by getting out of himself and offering his life, fully saying "Here I am for you" and accepting the responsibility of walking along with the beloved.

But this is rooted in a fundamental disposition towards the other - that of acceptance. To accept is to fully recognize the other as mysterious - as someone whose existence is so rich and complex that my images, my categories, of my beloved are still those that only point to that which I still do not know about her. It might be true that it is only through those impressions that I have that I first started to like and love her, but the real challenge here is to learn to accept and recognize the other as unfathomable, someone whom I cannot capture as a whole. O have to recognize that it is in commitment and in time that I would gradually know and see her for who she really is.

That is why accepting the beloved is not like watching her just like a scientific observation. To do so is to refuse to accept her communication of the self, to do away with her self-giving. Rather, to accept her entails going with her, walking with her, joining her in unfolding the mysteries of her very being, and at the same time opening yourself to her and asking her to join you in your own journey. To accept the beloved is to help her trudge the long walk of life, to be there when she needs someone, to be of help when she asks for one, to be PRESENT for her. That, I believe, is the only way to dive into her mystery and my own mystery, and it is only in this plunging that I learn to unearth who I am and who she is, both in relation to each other.

It is only in joining one another that one truly accepts, loves, and, most importantly, hopes for one another. I merely do not hope for the better, but I just hope. I choose to continue to give myself to her because I know that it is only in this way that I learn to accept her for what she is, for what I really am. It is only in this way that I open my wounds, that I learn to see myself as belonging to a bigger picture. It is only in walking with her that I learn that I really am a circle incomplete, a star that has to rise with the sky, an authentic whole me that is never complete without a you. In loving, I recognize the need to walk together as one, to go into paths we have not yet trudged, to walk with each other, letting each other grow in each other's embrace and let one blossom in time.

It is in love that we learn that our wounds could be healed only in our compassion, our suffering with, the other.

I'm (Sort Of) Back

2010-02-17T21:33:00.000-08:00

Hello, blogosphere. I'm trying to regain my internet life after all those weeks and days of pain and hardwork.

But consider this:

I believe that human hard work is like sex and parenting. After sex, one would just get tired and quite lonely, unsatisfied (as to what I hear). Tristitia Amoris.

But here comes the baby, and you're happy. After birth and a few cuddly months, you'll end up lonely and think about education and growth.

Have the right things to help you take care of the baby, and the right dough for quality education. And after a few years, you'll end up thinking about his autonomy.

And since I am doing my report, kindly fill in the missing pieces. The point here is that we're never really successful until we have reached the end. Bow.

Oh, and one of the good Inglourious Basterds art I was looking at a few moments ago:

And now we're down to the last stretch

2010-02-14T17:16:00.000-08:00

I'm currently living a semi-closed existence. Because I have to.

Studying for 30+ thesis statements is no joke. And it's more real for me when in fact in coincides with two important, life-defining papers.

Shot clock is ticking down. Hell will soon break loose, and I have to keep myself composed, relax, and ready for anything to happen.

The Day I Wore Red

2010-02-04T16:43:00.000-08:00

Last Sunday, the 31st of January, I had enough time to accompany my dad and return to San Beda to celebrate the feast of the Most Holy Child Jesus of Prague (Sto. Nino de Praga) by attending the procession and attending mass with a few of my Benedictine mentors.

And how it felt really good to go back to my roots.

I spent the whole afternoon talking to a lot of people I had been with more than eight years ago. Of course, there were a few friends from the minor seminary who were there, and we had a little chat before the procession and before I left the place. But of course, there was nothing more surprising than finding a lot of people who were with me in the past and were still there in school. There were my teachers, both those who decided to retire once the grade school and high school was removed in the Manila campus, and those who stayed with SBC even though it transferred to its Rizal campus. I also found some of my old classmates, as well as "Mang Roger," the balut vendor of antiquity, who was still there after more than 25 years of selling balut both inside and outside the campus.

As I strolled along the halls and corridors of the school, I found memories flashing back "in the early days of our boyhood." There were those times of going out of campus to play Counterstrike (and not being seen by the semi-panoptic grade school coordinators), the quad assemblies where we are required to pray the daily novenas and the rosary during October, the petty cases of cheating, fighting, and that-which-I-cannot-name-in-this-blog, our different clubs in grade school, and, most of all, the experience of the Benedictine way of life centered in "Ora et Labora."

However, I was faced with a different look of San Beda. Besides the new St. Placid Sports Complex (which previously was the GS/HS basketball court, where boys in uniforms like us would go for a few basketball games before going home), there is the presence of those that you will see once in a while during our times - young women. Before, the only girls that come in the Sto. Nino feast are those that are a)family members of students, faculty, and alumni, b)the women faculty themselves, c)some friends from the nearby colleges - Holy Spirit and La Conscolacion, d)some "guests" from our sister school St. Scholastica's College, and e)girlfriends of Bedans. Furthermore, the campus is littered with young boys (like us) in gala uniforms, as participants of processions, both from grade school and high school, and one way to distinguish them from those in the college is precisely that gala uniform (because the college during our time do not have uniforms and are only required to wear any red shirt). Now, a different scene was presented to me. College Bedans now have the Hogwarts-style uniform, and there were no more grade school and high school in gala uniforms. A loss of the original Bedan spirit, as I have thought, together with the need of this institution to move and be known.

In a way, I did have a different picture of the Sto. Nino feast. My dad said that there was not much of an excitement, since the active grade school and high school boys (and their respective Family Councils) were quite absent, and they are those that make the feast a livelier one. As a grade school alumnus, I somehow agree to that, that most of the fun was lost because of the loss of what we were before. However, I also think that this different scene opens up new horizons and new possibilities for the San Beda community, and I am still happy and hopeful for my alma mater, that it may continually grow as they cope up with the different realities around them.

Overall, I really felt glad that I was able to go back, because I was reminded of how special am I was nursed by three different religious orders: first, the Benedictines who had a profound respect for Divine, worldly beauty and discipline, the diocesan priests and their orientation towards local community-building (which I would hopefully belong to in the future), and finally, the Jesuits with their education and Ignatian spirituality. It reminded me of the way I think right now, the way I live my vocation and choose it among all possible alternatives. And I think that there is one common denominator, a common lesson that I was taught, and that is passion. It is the drive to orient oneself totally towards the Other, to go beyond myself and my own comfort zones and challenge myself to new possibilities that open up. It is the drive to work hard, not for oneself, but for the other, in the name of love and compassion. Finally, it is to learn to go on with life and never be let down by the circumstances that one was in.

And ofcourse, there come the little important things. The Benedictines taught me the true value of PRAYER and WORK, the right way of singing (or, in my case, praying) the psalms, and right liturgy. The diocesans taught us the value of rigor and critical obedience, and, in part, the Jesuits, where most of life learning took place within and outside the walls of our interdiocesan seminary, and even down from the proverbial hill, taught me in seeing God in and above all things and continually discerning God's will for me (together with all the doses of existential phenomenological philosophy my mentors taught me). All of these under placing passion at the core of one's life.

With everything that was part of me, all I could say is ut in omnibus, glorificetur Deus, that in all things God may be glorified. And as a Bedan, Guadalupe seminarian, and, most of all, a Josefino and Atenean, all I could do to thank God is to give back, to be of service to the Church he continually nourishes.

R.I.P. J.D. Salinger

2010-01-28T17:18:00.000-08:00

1919-2010.

Now we can go emo like the young kids did after reading "The Catcher in the Rye."

But seriously, time to honor him.

Kobe, The Lakers So Far… And Existence (Tertia Pars)

2010-01-28T17:06:00.000-08:00

Return to Reality

With only a little more than thirty games remaining in the regular season. The question now becomes more pertinent: are they going to make number two?

And it is in these times that things are more doubtful. The Lakers have given up the lead to the Cavaliers, with whom they lost all games already. The schedule will strike the other end of the scale, as they will be going on various eight-to-ten day road trips. Kobe still isn't playing a hundred percent, and we can't say that everything will be alright, because, obviously, the team is on the verge of facing its own demons and rebuilding itself as a team. Those are the true woes of the Lakers for this part of the story.

And we need not answer with statistical probabilities, as these are still mere abstracted potencies that do not really show us anything about a genuinely good Lakers game. What we need now are things that are REALLY needed, things that should be evident by now and consistently seen in the following games. And maybe, they could teach us a lesson or two in life.

1.Passion is a must, and it seems that the Lakers have lost this save for Kobe Bryant. They need to keep the flame alive and the constant hunger for the trophy more intense than before. The problem with the Lakers is that they slack off and refuse to squarely handle pressure. They must be aware that all of them play a significant role in the Lakers offense, and once one goes soft, the team would eventually break down. They have to seize all scoring opportunities, shoot less and attack the basket more. Furthermore, the bench should either try keeping the lead or increasing it. A face-down defeat is a huge win, and they must bring it on. Basketball is just about bringing the ball from one side of the court to the other, and making a basket with much intimidation brings out the difference.

2.Maximizing each and every one's skills and capabilities would be important in clinching the crown. The big men should assert their presence in the paint on both sides of the court. For this Lakers team, efficient scoring and tight defense would be the simple key to a huge victory. Never should there be a moment that those in the court should take lightly. Penetrating and drawing fouls have been, I think, what the Lakers missed for the past games this month. And they should already mark the paint with "No Trespassing" by playing inside defense, while focusing sights on the snipers that could shoot the ball from beyond the "arc d'trey." Awareness of skills and situations is a primary concern if they really want to reach the light at the end of this dark tunnel.

3.The right combinations make the right game, and yes, there is such a thing as putting the right people in the court. This calls for the bench to step up and play like the starters do most of the time. Once everyone is able to get the rhythm of the game, shooting and defending would never be a problem. Passes, strong side zones, and the ability to initiate the triangle with varying and switching roles that lead to an easy basket become our own measuring sticks of team chemistry, and if in

4.Give Kobe Bryant some air to breathe. He keeps the team alive in tight situations, but his teammates should, too. Pau and L.O. are the ones that lead the forefront in these times. Once they fall or go soft, then everything is bound to fall apart. They must keep their heads up and learn to play as real big men. Honestly, Drew can't be fully trusted, but now is the time to earn the trust of his teammates on both sides of the court. Ron Artest needs to step up more in terms of offense, and the bench duo of Brown and Farmar should make the most out of their minutes. Remember that the team is as strong as its weakest player (and I mean Ammo and Sasha, but they don't really matter that much… or until Kobe will be out for a few games), so there is a need to go together, to work problems out together, to act as if Kobe Bryant is not the superstar, to go with each other's flow. Once this is done, once each one as a team member achieved the Ubermensch status, this Laker team will not make it in the Finals.

The Lakers still have time left, and these remaining games are not about "just" winning. It is winning… with an attitude, an attitude that kills, devours, and reduces opponents to nothing, a kind of attitude that becomes a part of their very own character that they will bring to the 2010 NBA Finals. And if they were able to end the decade with their second straight trophy, then the basketball prophets who try to make sense of what it means to be a legend might just have succeeded in doing so.

Postscript: Life Is A Laker Game. Play It.

I admit that this is a discussion that is out of the boxes of basketball analysis, but then, my continuous encounter with the current Lakers team brings about a double-binding, towards a synthetic view of two realities that occur to me from within and without. In watching a Lakers game, seeing the box score, or just reading about how the network of Lakers fans comment about the win (with some dissing those who diss the Lakers or Kobe), it seems that this basketball team does not only present itself as a product of history. More than that, it presents itself as a hermeneutical key, that which could be used to interpret and make sense of existence as a whole. It brings together history and existence, and this insight could not just be left alone in the corner of the mind. It must be shared, expressed, and given meaning.

See life as a regular season game, where in every morning that I wake up and start my day, it's just like every regular season game taken seriously. I carry with the present me the past that I have been, the present world I am immersed in, the present circumstances that present themselves to me, and the future that I hope that achieve, a future that might just be as promising as I expect it to be. In each day I find myself living, I find myself preparing for the jump ball, for the ball to be in my hands, and attack my way towards the basket.

In every day I live, I am always situated in the court, like I could never get out of it. And, as complicated as being in the court one can be, life is, as always. I go there with a certain attitude, a kind of mentality in playing my game. I have my own style, my own flow, my own moves. It is up to me to execute one of the three options: shoot, pass, or dribble. I may choose to dribble past life, to overcome the many hands , feet, and faces of the brick walls of problems, to have the courage to drive through them. I may choose to pass, to decenter attention from my self and ask help from my teammates in order to reach my objective. Or I may shoot, to go for the basket, carrying all my strength and determination to covert a score. Whatever I do, it is towards one end: to convert opportunities into achievements, to bring together individual moments and integrate it to this whole called life.

Eventually, I have to get to the other side of the court, to play D, to not let opponents get past me. In me requires strength, toughness, and determination. With all the storms that faze life, one can only do is to prepare and be on guard. And if the opportunity to make something out of it comes up, then come and grab the board, and take another chance of seizing life, to bring the ball to the basket once again.

In the end, it boils down to playing the game. Sometimes, we win and celebrate, but there are times that we lose and feel the need to get over it. But then, what is important is the way one played the game, that each win and loss was a great game from the very start. Ultimately, it is passion that sets everything, much like what would set the Lakers this year. It is that which will bring us to the Finals, and ultimately, to the everyday glories that we long for.

And if we fail? We learn to let be. Learn from the lessons. Move on. Strive to live a better life, never denying it from any opportunity to prove oneself. After all, it is in doing such that defeats become parts of our success after all.

Kobe, the Lakers So Far… And Existence (Secunda Pars)

2010-01-26T17:21:00.000-08:00

Figuring Out Kobe

I've seen myself in the early part of the decade hating the Lakers because they've been too much, or too great for everyone else. Especially Kobe Bryant.

Yes, that ball-hogging freak who wants to make a name for himself. The one who has don jersey number eight and acted as if everything depended on him. As if Shaq wasn't there. As if Brian Shaw wasn't there. As if Phil wasn't the coach. Shot after shot after shot (save few lob passes to Shaq), all is Kobe. And we're all saying like, "this kid is too much."

But come the three-peat championship, 2004, and the alleged cases against Kobe, and here we face a problem for the Lakers. With most of the championship and near-championship Lakers gone, Kobe Bryant was then left as a leader of a young team that offers less of a promise and more of a problem. The only one out there who could provide some support is the sub-par inconsistent forward Lamar Odom, who, in a way, knows how to score alongside Bryant. The heartbreaker came early in the season when Rudy Tomjanovich had to resign his post, alongside with Bryant's injury. And what was the result? Nada. No playoff appearance. And in their underdog state, I started becoming a fan of Kobe Bryant, because I want to witness a possible change that could come to him, a kind of conversion from selfish star to excellent teammate. And the next few years became a witness to this grand change, I should say.

The next years seemed to be more promising. Derek Fisher and Phil Jackson were back in the Laker business, in keeping Kobe Bryant happy in the big city. Also, new men came in for the Lakers squad in replace of old ones. But then, 2006 and 2007 were just big disappointments. Probably the closest ones to being success were Kobe's 81 points against the Raptors, setting a new 2nd highest NBA individual score in a game, and the 3-1 advantage of the Lakers over the Phoenix Suns (which, unfortunately, was followed by three straight defeats from Steve Nash and the Suns and deprived of the chance to advance in the playoff tree). After all this, perhaps Bryant's disappointment reached its maximum, with a clear statement before the start of the '07-'08 season: he wants to be traded.

But in what was supposed to be his last year as a Laker, he got perhaps the best gift shipped to him: Pau Gasol. Others judge this as a trade bust for the Memphis Grizzlies, but for L.A., it was a win-win situation: Memphis has been given cap space to develop young talents, and Los Angeles got something to keep Kobe intact: a reliable teammate. From struggling between the fourth and fifth position in the West, the Lakers managed to climb slowly to the top spot and ended with a 57-25 record. However, the upgrade wasn't enough as the Lakers, short of strength in the post and of the presence of Andrew Bynum and Trevor Ariza, lost to the Celtics in six games.

Nobody expected that 2010 will be for them, but most critics speculated that they are the team to beat. They had a complete roster, and, despite a few setbacks, they again landed the top spot in the West. They went through a rough road in the postseason, in search for consistency and team chemistry, and they eventually reached the Finals, beating the Orlando Magic in five games for their fifteenth franchise championship.

Perhaps we could divide the Lakers metanarrative into two phases, setting the Mamba as a focal point. From '02-'05, we have what we call a "Kobe Bryant v1," the ball-hogging scoring machine that everyone loathes, and from '05 to the present age, we have the "Kobe Bryant v2," the Black Mamba that everyone came to look up to and idolize. This is the Kobe Bryant that strived to form a team, to make everyone better by being selfish both in and out of the court. He is the Kobe Bryant who is more than 81 points, more than the three-peat and the fourth, more than the individualistic player that everyone knows.

Then what? He is the epitome of disciplined basketball, of achieving the impossible, and, most importantly, of team leadership. He is the chief now, and with the way he runs the team, the Lakers could reach great heights that was never expected back in 2005.

And this is the Kobe Bryant that I look up to, and he bears a significant mark that transcends all the stats, the awards, and the highlight reels. What I look up to him is his work ethic, the way he carries himself as someone who knows how to treat business as business, with no bull whatsoever. He is not an Allen Iverson or Shaquille O'Neal that grabs the attention of the cameras and the videophones and creates controversy and shallow creativity. Rather, he is the poker face of the NBA, more than determined to enjoy while being very serious, while toppling the different records set in the Association, while constantly sweating his way out, and, most importantly, while establishing himself as a true basketball player worthy of being imitated. Behind it all is a burning bush that speaks "Winning is living."

Sure, we can compare Kobe with MJ, and unquestionably, almost everyone would go for the latter. I myself would, but we now live in different times, where performance comes in a constant flux, and everything has been more competitive than before. And with many different superstars of Kobe's time coming and going, it is he who uniquely stands among the rest. Sure, we can say that LeBron James could soar greater heights, and he could actually lead a championship team. But, unlike LeBron who is the NBA's spoiled kid since '03, Kobe was able to walk his way up the ladder of skill and fame. He underwent a rigorous phase of asserting oneself as a player capable of playing in all kinds of teams, and I believe that the winning Lakers is not the only witness to this. In fact, his '08 Olympic Stint became a witness to the level of immaturity LeBron has and the team performance that Kobe possesses. In fact, LeBron could use a good tip or two from Kobe in order to improve the way he plays with his team.

Of course, other comparisons could be made, and with what I have shown here, there are still a lot to contest. But what I want to stress here is that the superstar that Kobe Bryant has been is not just a product of sheer genetics and multiple scoring feats. More than that, he is the result of hardwork, rigor, discipline, and a continuous rupture of self brought about by the different phases of flux that dawned upon his team. He stood up and proved to the world that to assert oneself, to show success personified, takes real hard work and the ability to adjust to certain circumstances in order to conquer the weaknesses coming from within and without.

To the fool who says Kobe hasn't gone this far, look at the Ubermensch of our time. I do not absolutize Kobe Bryant, but he is one of those who learned to stand up and make a difference in ways possible. He made a player out of Trevor Ariza and Shannon Brown, he scored and passed well in spite of four injuries that hounded him in every game. He knew unselfish play which led to the trophy. He allowed himself to be transformed under the guidance of Phil Jackson. He learned post-up moves at the rather old age (in professional basketball terms) of 31. He was the youngest in his era to grab four rings. All out of sheer determination that carries with it a vision. Now, who wouldn't want to emulate the way this guy works? Who wouldn't want to trudge the great and noble path to greatness?

And we return to the situation at hand, the problem with the Purple and Gold.

Kobe, The Lakers So Far… And Existence (Prima Pars)

2010-01-25T19:39:00.000-08:00

Some contend that the problems have already been there, masked behind the speculations that the team of tinseltown has a great chance of getting that trophy back. The signs are there: Kobe, in spite of learning new moves in the post, gets older. Pau Gasol is out with a hamstring injury, and it could follow. And Ron Artest, while being a defensive upgrade for the Lakers, needs to work on speed and field goal efficiency rating to ride the bus to the championships by participating in fastbreak offense.

I do not concur. From the start, the Lakers have still shown themselves as a team still hungry for a championship. As of now, they share the best record (due to a recent loss to Toronto) with the Cleveland Cavaliers, another title contender who is as hungry as they were back in '09. So far, the Lakers, I should say, have been doing their best; however, not the best that they are supposed to be.

Perhaps, the woes have started in early December, when their main gunner Kobe Bryant broke his index finger. Yes, it might just be one injury that could take too long to heal, and one might think that since Kobe broke his pinky and was still able to grab the championship, everything could be alright. Right? Wrong. I think that this has become a turning point in the Lakers' regular season run, and I say this on the following reasons:

1.Those who play basketball, or at the least, who do shooting practices regularly would say that the pinky would be no big problem in shooting. Simply tape it to the ring finger, and you're 80% good to go. On the other hand, injuring the index and middle fingers would also mean injuring your whole shooting hand. Much of the force in shooting would involve the strength of the index finger, as it carries much of the force from the palms to the ball.

2.A hurting hand affects not only shooting, but also gameplay. During games, Bryant's finger was frequently hit, and therefore affects his disposition towards the game. If not for his thirst for the win, Kobe could have opted to sit out and let his teammates do the dirty job of losing. In fact, it was pure determination that saved him and his team. I would not like to go further, but what is important here is the emphasis on how the injury affects the game with Kobe around.

3.Kobe is not just the prime scorer and go-to guy of the Lakers both on and off the floor. He is also the head, that which facilitates gameplay, empowers teammates, and leads all the moves leading to the win (of course, with the direction of coach Phil Jackson). Thus, to have this injury is to be stabbed two times both in the head and in the chest. Not only are the crucial treys and jump shots affected, but also the way how each member would respond to those situations. Before, nobody would doubt that Kobe would make it. But now, each one has to step up and make crucial shots. I see this as a significant development that the Lakers should look upon, as there has to be someone who has to make the final say, to get the W for that game in case it got into a crucial, make-or-break situation, someone has to get the ball and put it down the hoop. In short, the Lakers HAVE TO heavily rely on the others, not just Kobe. And with this injury, I say that this is a serious note to be taken.

I'm not saying all negative. With Kobe partially disabled and "sidelined" in his role, the other Lakers, in one way or another, learned to step up and face the pressure the way Kobe does. So far, the eleven losses that the Lakers had as of now were from +.500 teams (save for a significant few), and by induction and speculation, we could sense that it has serious implications in the next months, most especially in June, where, as I speculate, all plays will be centered on the Mamba as the superstar of the team.

But looking at the other games considered as Lakers "easy-wins," a lot has been made when Kobe sits out and lets his teammates finish the game. Remember the best game of the season, against Dallas, as well as the other bouts with teams that are below .500. Besides the starting squad, I would like to commend three key players from the bench, the first being Shannon Brown for taking up the responsibility of scoring in crucial situations(remember 22 points?), Jordan Farmar for his improving style at the number one spot, and, of course, Lamar Odom, who, after shedding off much pressure as part of the L.A. Big Men Trifecta, began to make big treys and tip-ins that saved the Lakers from losing face. In fact, in the last games of the Lakers, the bench and the bigs hog up the most pluses in team performance. If there was anything significant about Bryant, it would be his key assists and a few thirty-plus points. Andrew Bynum had been very significant, despite some lapses mostly in the D. Gasol tries to bring back his figure after two consecutive hammys, and Odom, though inconsistent, fares up so well that he becomes a threat to the opponent. Indeed, we see here a deep Lakers squad that know how to work on their problems.

In the middle of this big problem comes another wound that the Lakers need to get over with. Double that and you have the current situation. Last Christmas was the greatest heartbreak for all the Lakers fans, as the hopeful repeaters succumbed to a huge 15-point loss against their top competitor, the Cleveland Cavaliers, and to lose to LeBron's squad is nearly tantamount to losing every ounce of hope to come up with number two (though I am not saying that we totally lost hope). Everyone thought that the Lakers were just in pretty bad shape during that game, and everyone expects a home bust at Quicken Loans after two months. But come February, after a game of tit-for-tats and breaking single digit leads, the Lakers again lost to the Cavaliers, leaving an angry Kobe and an anxious team who faces the pressure of securing the trophy for another year.

Face it, there is in fact empirical evidence that the Lakers have faced their formidable foe since the seventies or 2008 (of which I could judge that there are no mismatches without consideration on health or individual game momentum). Number one problem would be LeBron James, who practically owned his defenders, most especially the injured Bryant and Artest. I have to admit that this year, he just plays so well that he was able to carry his team single-handedly, and he poses a threat, a road block to the Lakers.

And from this, everything would follow. The Lakers' bigs were mauled and forced into foul trouble by Anderson Varejao, Zydrunas Ilgauskas, and, most importantly, Shaquille O'Neal. In primary school terms, they were totally bullied, not just on the inside, but also on the outside, as shots came one after the other, without any Laker attempt to deflect a shot or raise a hand. Lastly, there are the troublesome shooting trio of Mo Williams, Daniel Gibson, and Anthony Parker. The second game left all Laker fans shocked. There were many instances where the side wings were so much open for threes. Of course, we recognize that as a pertinent weakness of the Strong Side Zone employed by Jackson to avoid passing between LeBron and Shaq, but these call for readjustments in the D. If the Lakers continue to let the Cavs exploit their Achilles' heel, then we have a problem in gunning for the second straight title.

And perhaps, the question of significance would still rise above those problems in gameplay. What is one, two regular season games, anyway? The Finals is what really counts, and the Lakers are still up there in terms of experience and crucial game situations. And what if we lose to the Cavs in the Finals? Kobe is still up and running, Pau will be there, and a stronger L.O. and Ronron emerges. Considering no one leaves or badly gets hurt, then we're still up for '11. Why is this a big deal for Laker fans, and for the team in general?

In answering this question, the big picture comes up and presents itself to us, and these are things which no stat (or some diachronic ones, actually) could ever describe or explain. I think that the hype and tension that everyone, including the fans, are feeling today all revolve around the pressures of holding on with the Lakers and with Kobe Bryant in particular. For what is at stake are things even more than pure basketball, than the raw fun of playing it. Hell, even more than that.

Rather, immortality is on the line, the very fact that the Lakers were already expected to make another record, another big exit to end the decade. Since '02, no one has gotten back-to-back and grandslam championships, and with the most versatile, talented, and highly potential players on the line, the Lakers are set to do what they have done almost eight years ago. The battle is not just about delivering the enemy down to the ground. It's about rising with glory. It's about embodying hubris that doesn't end in tragedy, but rather, in flawless victory, in a victory where the Lakers will be forever sealed in history.

That, I think, is why the world watches Kobe Bryant and his team with eyes that blaze with seriousness and fury as his during the '09 Finals. It seems that everyone put the pressure on L.A. as the top team. Forget Cleveland, forget LeBron. The Purple and Gold is the monolith of basketball that has not yet reached its peak, and in order to really prove this, they have to get their second straight trophy.

That is why every regular season game seems like a Game 7 playoff game. That is why every shot Kobe takes is either that of glory or despair, that the big men post like no other game exists, that injuries have to be seriously taken and remedied. Boys and girls, for this time, it's not just the game that is on the line. It's life, not just of the whole Laker team, but of the world that watches them. That is why the two losses to Cleveland wounded them, as something that mattered most to them, and I can't blame Kobe Bryant from going too furious with what happened. Focus should be returned. Passion should be reignited. Hunger should be recognized once again, a kind of hunger that says "09 isn't enough. There has to be some more." And for a growing team that hasn't realized the destruction it could do, there really has to be some more.

And we could deduce. Each and every game against a potential playoff rival matters most. If not a preview, then it is an ordeal, something that the Purple and Gold have to overcome. They have to rule out, intimidate, and own each and every team. They have to make a statement, to induce fear and trembling. On the other hand, wins and losses come in the way, but they should be seen as moments for growth, of being able to be wounded and shrugged off, in order to let themselves wake up and realize that they are still on the way, that they have to be stronger and drop the adjective "soft" associated with each and every one of them. They have to attack and get it. They have to improve. They have to be the Lakers, the best that they should be.

And perhaps, nothing, or no one, experiences having one's life in the game on the line for the best player of the decade, the master himself, Kobe Bryant.

Hopeful

2010-01-21T07:11:00.000-08:00

... that NCC-2 will usher great change in the Philippine Church, along the lines of openness to and active participation of the laity in parish communities, as well as to the larger units (the different Ministries, Religious Orders, and Dioceses) of the Church.

I hope that this will show, as our Department Chairman of the Philosophy Department says, the Church as its best, the bearer of the Spirit in the modern world, and not at its worst, a monolithic unit that closes upon itself and stays within its own sphere.

Oramus pro Ecclesia!

Tips On Surviving A Date Movie... Datelessly.

2010-01-17T17:26:00.000-08:00

Some basic things:

1. Never EVER watch on the theaters. DVD will be fine.
2. Be ready with intellectual musings on love.
3. Grab all the critical theorists in your bookshelf, together with a few philosophers like Martin Heidegger, Jean Luc Marion, and your notes on Philosophy of Religion and of the Human Person.
4. Chocolates will do.
5. DON'T CRY.
6. Make an inspiring blog post afterwards.

Cheers.

When Life Was Great… Not On Our Own Terms

2010-01-17T17:25:00.000-08:00

I've been to a lot of apostolates of indigenous peoples, but it was only in my immersion program that I was fully able to appreciate what it really means to live in a community where life was really great without the comforts of city life (of course I do confess using Mobile Facebook during the first and last day, but it was a different matter altogether).

Our immersion group was assigned on Sitio Maporak, Zambales. We had to board the bus going to Iba at seven in the morning of Friday. We reached the town at about eleven, took the jeep to the river, and crossed it (with much force, since everyone of us crossed the river as if we had been through a rough foot spa) to reach the peaceful community of Aetas near the mountainside.

Once we reached there, we got assigned to our foster parents. Mine was Tatay Alfredo, a sixty-three-year-old farmer who knows just how to build not just his family, but also the Aeta community. Not only was he able to send his daughters to school as scholars and his sons to different working places, he was able to keep a small farm both in the mountains and in his back-, no, courtyard.

He served us with a lot of veggies freshly picked from his farmlands. As soon as we arrived, we ate sardines on okra and the small, bite-size ampalaya, which has a different bitterness compared to the Manila-exported ampalaya that we have way back in the seminary.

After that, we went outside with his grandsons and granddaughters, headed straight to the river where each and every kid bathed in, picked green Indian mangoes, and had stories until the sun sets. On the first day, we had a total taste of barrio life, which I admit was not totally away from modernity, because before we slept, we had to watch TV Patrol and an episode of "May Bukas Pa," something that most of the mothers and elders in the place were looking forward to.

We woke up early the next day to do "Harvest Moon" work, as we watered the plants in Tatay Alfredo's farm. As we did that, he taught us a bit of Farming 101, telling us that veggies shouldn't be watered everyday, and that veggies would lose the taste of freshness if they will be sprayed with chemicals. We afterwards went to the Elementary School started by the Ateneo. All of us took part in building a simple bench where all our energies were spent on transporting sand, mixing cement, and laying it down, and we did it for the whole morning, while we were thinking of things to do for the community afternoon and playing with the bunch of kids we were with.

Come the community afternoon, where all of us presented, played games, and shared touching stories of being with our foster families. Of course, it was all important, as we were able to take a step back and reflect on our day-old stay in the community. But the most exciting part of the day was that all of us, boys and girls, were able to finally take a bath into the nearby river. We were all there, jumping and wading in joy, as we brought our towels, shirts, soaps, and shampoos and took a bath. All of us had fun playing like kids and cleaning ourselves up in the river, and when it was dark, we came back and rested earlier than usual (while some were still able to gather and tell their own stories).

The next day was basically a day of goodbyes for everyone. After packing our things and having our processing, we already bid farewell to our own foster families. We wholeheartedly thanked them and made our way back home to Manila.

And what did we bring back after this two-day stay in the mountainside? Well, more than the bags of bananas and indian mangoes, there is the experience of the joys and consolations of the simple life, a short length of time when we did not think of everything that concerns the city, most especially the looming concerns about academics. However, I had to admit that, like Father Roque, I was able to have true philosophical insights during my stay in the barrio. Most of us, including myself, admitted that it would be too hard to go back to the city, since the simple life is just too hard to leave, but then, it's time for us to live our life as they live theirs, so inevitably, we have to say goodbye.

And to end this (seemingly unorganized) account of our rich experience, I would like to end with an emphasis on a fact. We were there not to feel that we are lucky to have a modern life. To do that would be to define life" fundamentalistically," on our own terms. Instead, we were there to experience the other, an entirely different world, with a different set of consolations and problems, but that which we could possibly enter. Perhaps helping this community comes as a corollary, for what is important is that we were able to be one with them and fully experience their life.

*Pictures to follow*

Nine of 2009 Music

2010-01-17T17:06:00.000-08:00

Like any other year, two thousand and nine seem to be a colorful and controversial year for the music industry as a whole. Here are nine figures of the music industry which gained enough popularity to be remembered as the hallmarks of the music of 2009.

1.Michael Jackson

His death, together with "This Is It," brought everyone back to their early childhood days when imitating the moonwalk would be the coolest thing in the world and the guitar riffs of "Black & White" and "Thriller." Surely, Michael will be remembered forever as the icon of pop.

2.Lady GaGa

Simply put, she is the new Pop Queen of scandal and creativity, mixed together in the universal solvent of music. Not only had she written good songs and did eccentric dances, but she also came up with a performance-level personality on and off the studio (with the enlarged clitoris). Hyperreal, boys. It's all hyperreal, and the Lady is the new Madonna.

3.Taylor Swift

This girl flared up the charts with her top pop songs, "Love Story," "Fifteen," and "You Belong To Me," and she hasn't reached her peak yet. Furthermore, she has enough talent to shake and amuse her audience. Remember the "Thug Story" video she made with T-Pain? Yes, Taylor Swift is still on her way. We just hope that she keeps up with it.

4.blink-182

Out of the plane crash involving the late DJ AM and Travis Barker came the old (and new) Blink-182. Tom DeLounge, Mark Hoppus, and Barker, thought of joining forces once again for the crass immaturity and heavy pop-punk that the whole rock world misses. After touring with pop-punk bands like Fall Out Boy and All Time Low, they're set to complete their next album. Travis, Tom, and Mark, all of us missed you… a lot, and everyone's hoping for new greats and punk hit legends.

5.Lil' Wayne

Tha Carter III hit the stores late '08, but the presence of Lil' Wayne has been greatly felt this '09. With a plethora of potential top singles (like "Lollipop" and "Mrs. Officer") and collaborations (including one from, uh, Pete Wentz), he took over the charts and music news, making 2009 the bling-est year for Weezy. He had his last laugh for 2009 by taking his Gibson in the front stage and releasing a rock album, "Reprise," which shows Wayne's talent beyond rap.

6.Kanye West

The year 2009 would never be remarkable in the music industry without Yeezy, primarily because of his bashing of Taylor Swift right in the stage. But more than that, he's armed with his collaborations, his 808, and the shutter shades that he has made famous. He's had his sorries and reconciliations with Tay, and we expect better things from now on.

7.Electronic Rock and Crunk Core

Said to be just a few of the genres that emerged from the growing communities of scenesters and hipster musicians all across the West, these two genres of rock already has a growing influence on music in general. In 2009, the list overflows, and it continues to grow. In Electronic Rock we see the rise of the synthesizer and the countless rock remixes which come in a package with power-pop and punk song lines and riffs. Here we could add Metro Station, 3OH!3, Owl City, and a lot more. On the other hand, Crunk Core wields the powerful screams and instrumental patterns of post-hardcore combined with hip hop and autotune beats, and what comes out of it are the flooding of MySpace and Buzznet pages with bands like Brokencyde and Blood on the Dance Floor. For 2010, we're going to stay a little longer with them, so enjoy the moment as we bear with it.

8.The cast of "Glee"

The newcomers of the covers department appears not just on iTunes and other download servers. In fact, they're on TV. With thirteen episodes of covers, the fresh singers of Glee is sure to rock the screens with different does of Pop, Rock, and RnB. And of course, don't dare miss the great story.

9.Miley Cyrus, Demi Lovato, and Selena Gomez

My personal biases wouldn't want these to be put, but I think that objectively, I have to admit that they have entered the pop culture and infected everyone. Hannah Montana's alter ego rose to the charts and even had a movie. Ashley Tisdale seems to show that she's grown up and ready to take over not with her High School Musical tween character, but something more real, rougher and sexier. And Selena Gomez? Credit The Scene for her music.

Hell yeah, a lot to expect this '10.

Think Kobe Inspires? Come Friday and I'll Have My Own Existential Reflection

2010-01-17T07:10:00.000-08:00

got this post from forumblueandgold.com . Apparently, this is just one of the millions of people inspired by the work ethic of the greatest basketball player in history (of course, next to Jordan, but his is a different case). I credit my Epistemology class for introducing me to appreciating great rigor.

"And, enjoy the stories.

Kunal: A couple of summers ago during the Kobe trade demand fiasco I learned that he would work out at my school’s gym at UCI early in the mornings. Since I had absolutely nothing to do that summer I started going to the gym at daybreak around 6:30 AM hoping I would be lucky enough to catch a glimpse of him or something.

In the mornings it was just me and some local firefighters, so I figured if Kobe does come he would come around that time. 5 weeks passed and 3 times he was there but I missed him because those were my break days from the gym.

Just when I was about to give up hope it happened. He walked in through the door with two bodyguards/trainers/randoms and went to the squat rack. My heart stopped, I was literally like 6 feet away from my hero, a guy whose work ethic had influenced me in many facets of life. After a few seconds of being paralyzed I tried to act cool and pretend like I wasn’t looking at him, but I would peek over every minute or so just to see if he was still there. I wanted to talk to him or get him to acknowledge me somehow but I was too afraid of messing up his workout and him giving me the death stare. So I lurked around just watching him lift and do some ab work and balancing drills.

Time passes and he is about to leave, before doing so he busts out a few one armed pull ups. I have no idea what came over me but I decided I was going to do them too. So as he walked away I tried it on the same bar, bad idea. I slipped and fell flat on my behind and knocked over a stand of towels next to me. Kobe looks back and laughs and says “Keep at it” and did the head nod thing. He walked out and I probably laid there for a good 5 minutes because I was giddy that Kobe talked to me, and also sore as heck for falling.

I know it is naive to think in this day in age that athletes are role models but even though they are human and exhibit shades of gray like the rest of us they have the ability to inspire greatness. Kobe does that for me, and his words have motivated me since.

DJ-F.L.A.S.H. I’m from Vancouver but went to high school in Victoria, BC, and if you didn’t know, a guy named Steve Nash made his name in Victoria in a school called St. Michael’s, we’d play in their gym and you’d see all these Nash tributes in the rafters etc., why am I telling you all this? Well, everyone with any basketball knowledge on east coast Canada is a Suns “fan”.

The year Nash won his second MVP (I just call it “Kobe’s magical season”, 81pts, 35 ppg, and the shit that’s about to happen next), in my dorm we’d all watched the Suns-Lakers series together, all 50 macho rugby/hockey/basketball/football players in one living room, and I’d get the dirtiest looks from people when I’d cheer a Lakers basket, although I did have one more Laker fan to cheer with, he wasn’t as outgoing as me so I’d get most of the hate (especially when Kobe baptized Nash with that dunk, they kicked me outta the living room after that, suckers).

So it’s game four, by then I have a cast on my ankle because I’d just fractured it in a rugby game (got hit by two 250lb guys from both sides), the only benefit from not being able to walk for 3 months is that the Suns fans didn’t have the heart to kick me out anymore.

With the Lakers down 2 with less than 10 to play, I basically did the Laker’s commentary, that’s if you replace actual commentary with all profanities, so you can imagine what came out of my mouth when Smush got that steal (people use him like a punch line now, but Laker fans never forget the steal), and Kobe made a floater that would make Tony Parker ashamed of himself.
So OT, jumpball, Walton vs Nash, Luke almost tips it out of bounds but Kobe retrieves it, and I could feel the atmosphere in the whole room change in an instant, it’s like everyone in the room was about to be interrogated by Jack Bauer.

Bang! Game winner! Then came my first “defying laws of physics/medicine moment”, ’cause I swear to god I jumped like 40 inches (with the cast on my ankle) to chest bump the only other Laker fan in the room, and we both almost fell on our asses, but we couldn’t stop screaming.

It turns out that one ankle injury led to several back and hip injuries and basically ended my basketball career during my first season with the University of Toronto varsity team, (although I don’t think the chest bump did anything because I jumped off the opposite foot), but whenever I get down on myself for not being able to play anymore, I’d think of that Kobe moment and the biggest smirk will show up on my face, people on the subway look at me like I’m crazy but all I could hear is “final seconds, Bryant for the win, BAAAAAAAAAAANG!!!”

Isolate: Its august 22nd 2007 I’m back home from college for my brother’s wedding two days later. I’m one of 5 brothers and all of us have been Lakers fans for as long as we can remember and in turn HUGE Kobe fans because we’re all fairly young and don’t remember much before the mid to early ‘90’s. It was during the summer which means no Lakers games, so we were up late watching one of the FIBA America tournament games that were held in Las Vegas. When out of nowhere I scrapped all of my plans for my brothers Bachelor party and decided we were all going to pile into a car and drive the 4ish hours to Vegas to see Kobe in person at the game the next night. So the next morning we all piled into the car and headed to Vegas. We never told him exactly what we were doing, just that we were going to Vegas. (You could only imagine what he was thinking). Then when we pulled up the Thomas and Mac center on the UNLV campus he realized what was going on and started jumping up and down like a kid in a candy shop. We walk in and our tickets put us 12 rows behind the U.S.A. bench, close enough to actually hear Kobe, Lebron, Melo, Wade and everyone else talking. It just so happened to be Kobe’s birthday and when he got to the free-throw line for his first FT I looked at my brothers and we all started singing “Happy Birthday” as loud as we could, by the time we actually said “Happy birthday dear Kobe” everyone in the crowd had joined in, when we finished he looked up and winked at us. We’re all between 18-25 and we were all as giddy as kids. Best bachelor party ever!

Brian Q: I got my Bachelor’s degree last summer. It goes without saying that I had a roller-coaster of emotions going through me, between the exultation that I was going to complete something my parents couldn’t, and the jitters that come with upcoming post-grad life. I knew the were years of hard work put into school, and the ups and down with following the Lakers all the time, were coming to a head.

At the same time that our Lakers were making their run in the WC and NBA Finals, I was finishing off classes. With all the talk of Kobe’s incensed determination, I tried using that same fuel to cap off the best quarter grades I had since I started college. To top it all off, the Lakers played Game 5 the same day as my family’s graduation party (for me and other cousins that graduated). All of us were gathered at the TV, and when Kobe started jumping around in the wane of the 4th, it was like we both grew up, broke past that barrier of the past 4, 5 years, and got our degrees. Sharing that moment, even through a TV screen, will be a memory I carry forever.

Jodial: I’ve taken my wife to see the Lakers at Staples twice. The first time was in the spring of 2001, an afternoon game against the Knicks which the Knicks won by a point or two – I remember Fisher missed a shot at the buzzer. Kobe got hurt in the first quarter of that game and left without scoring a point – he went on to miss a bunch of games after that (this was while the team was struggling before they got it together and steamrolled the league in the playoffs).

The second time I took my wife to a Laker game was January 2006, against Toronto. You probably remember what Kobe did in that game. We were sitting about 10 rows back, even with the free throw line in front of the visitors’ bench, watching Kobe drop 55 on the Raptors in the second half from just a few feet away. Still the most amazing athletic performance I’ve ever seen. 0, 81. I tell my wife, “Kobe averages 40 when you go to a game.”

Bree: I have been a Lakers fan my whole life. You know when your little, you like whatever your parents like. Well thank goodness my dads a Lakers fan! Anyways, I would try to watch every game I had access to, so one year, my dad surprised me with Lakers tickets when they came to play the Jazz in Utah. I was so freaking excited to see them and my favorite player Kobe! I asked my dad if we can drive around downtown Salt Lake looking for their hotel and get maybe an autograph or just see him up close. So we found out where they stayed, so when their bus arrived for shoot around, my dad told me to go sit casually in the lobby and maybe see if I can get my jersey signed without any notice from the hotel staff kicking me out. So I was sitting waiting all chill, and all of a sudden Lakers players were coming out of the elevators one by one. Still felt calm but had huge knots in my stomached. Then Shaq came out and I’m like he really is a big dude! But then when I turned my head back to the elevator, Kobe was walking with a team official going over something. I totally froze and couldn’t speak! I was able to stand and I just had my jersey in my hand. And all of a sudden, he stopped and came over to me and said, “would you like me to sign that for ya?” I still couldn’t say anything! So he smiled and took the jersey and signed it. I started to cry like a baby and he looked at me and put his arm around me and padded my back and said, “it’s ok, have a good one!” with a smile and went towards the bus. So then I was able to walk out of the hotel with my jersey in my hand to show my dad and hopefully contain my emotions after my amazing experience. My dad was so happy for me.

Rafael: One day me and my family went to Disneyland and as I walked out of a ride with my daughter I bumped into to Kobe. I was wearing my Laker jacket and he said I had a nice jacket and went his way. This was a really cool moment and just seeing Kobe tower over me was awesome.

Michelle: I grew up watching Kobe and the Lakers. I mean I had the first shoes designed for Kobe, the crazy 8’s. I would think wearing those shoes would give me the talent on the court just like Kobe. I was probably 9 at the time. There are so many memories dealing with Kobe, it’s hard to choose.

It was the 2000 WCF Game 7 against the Portland Trailblazers. That day I had to go to a wedding reception at a restaurant and I was pretty bummed that I was going to miss the game. I mean come on it was Game 7! I’m walking to the restaurant with my family and my cousin stops me and goes “{don’t worry, we brought our mini TV, we just have to get a table with a plug.” We go in there, plug the TV watch the whole game. We had literally the bride and groom and about 50 people including the waiters surrounding the table watching the game. They literally gave me the mic to hold against the speakers so everyone could hear and mind you the TV was so small yet everyone was around it. Then it happens, Kobe does a cross over on Pippen, goes down the middle, and throws an ally-oop to Shaq and the whole room is yelling and screaming. Everyone’s in good cheers, hugging everyone, and the energy was just amazing. Seriously the guests at the reception were hugging the waiters.

Whenever I see that clip of the infamous Kobe-to-Shaq, I think of where I was at and I get a mental picture of everyone’s face when we saw that play. I look at Kobe now and see how much he’s grown to be the best in the league and I’m glad I was able to witness the greatness in the making throughout the years."

In the next days, after my comprehensive exams (which are analogous to NBA Playoffs), I, too, will have my own.

M-V-P! M-V-P!

2010-01-10T19:31:00.001-08:00

Jack, me want this shirt. Right now.

Sherlock Holmes

2010-01-10T04:04:00.000-08:00

Best viewed after three straight hours of "Left 4 Dead 2"

all about the detective story on a steam-punk setting, action-filled investigations, and Jude Law not scoring on more than one girl for the rest of the film.

Enjoy.

Look Forward To: When In Rome

2010-01-08T20:50:00.001-08:00

Nike Air Max Lebron VII

2010-01-05T17:06:00.000-08:00

as much as I hate The King, I dig this.

New York Knicks Edition. Sign the deal, 'Bron, and championship COULD be for you

My Oh-Nine

2010-01-05T16:52:00.000-08:00

Neither is 2009 a remarkable year nor is it something that does not have any trace of significance. However, I think that there were many things which happened in the last year (as of this hour that I was writing it) which are noteworthy, and these are experiences that served to be a significant part of my life. So for the year in review, I had a recap of nine gems of experience of the year two thousand and nine.

9.Of course, free times were spent like forever, considering the busy junior and senior year that I had. A particular favorite: Rock Band 2. It was the only way that I would bring out all the boiling passion for music and playing drums while looking up to the likes of Travis Barker and Andy Hurley. Can't form a band due to a busy schedule? Easy. Just prepare a few bucks and be the rockstar that you are.

8. The later part of the year was spent on relishing the last moments of college life. Our block went everywhere, ate anything, played all the games, and, most importantly, did philosophy in the most hardcore way possible (Okay, I was quite lying, we were digressing). It was the most important last year of our lives, and we were determined to spend it in the best ways possible.

7.For me, every year is a basketball fan's year, and for me, '09 has been the best year for a fan like me. First off, the Los Angeles Lakers, of which I am a fan of, won their 15th championship, and I consider perhaps as a climax to star Kobe Bryant's meta-narrative which dates back to 2000. The better side of it, though, is the fact that they haven't exhausted their full potential yet. With defensive star Ron Artest in '09's lineup, a back-to-back title is never far. The other one in the winning side of 2009 is my own school's basketball team. The Ateneo de Manila University Blue Eagles clinched their second straight title in the UAAP, which was followed by another title at the Philippine Collegiate Champions League. Indeed, it is a year of grace for the white-and-blue.

6.High school was the last time I went to a live concert (well, except for my Freshman OrSem), and with Mae & Katy Perry, I was able to bring back the experience of going live. I was with my brother Aaron, Mykee and Mon. Indeed, an awesome lineup of lively performances made charity more fun than ever, as the profits generated were used to offer help to the victims of Ondoy.

5.There are only one in a thousand chances that two siblings get to appear on a single school newspaper page, and me and my brother achieved the feat. While I was the interviewee for the article on my great teacher Fr. Roque Ferriols, SJ, my bro's head became the banner of the Blue Babble Battalion on that page. As soon as I got the copy, I immediately sent it to mom to have it framed.

4.Being a figure for public viewing isn't really my thing. But then, isn't it a rare experience to be featured on television? For me, it is, but as an altar server, that is. I felt honored that I was part of a historical event, to be able to take part in the liturgy for the funeral of the late President Corazon Aquino. More than the small three-to-five second flashes in the idiot box was the fact that I was there in the event itself. Hmm… Probably I will end up at the back of a 2,000 peso bill.

3.It became a running joke among the organization that we are "dorks on parade." But, what kind of org has a special reading room and tambayan at the De La Costa Building. Accredited orgs can own the MVP for all they want, but for the Samahan sa Pilosopiya, we have a sacred space inside the Philosophy Department. As part of the core member of the Samahan, I was one of the guys who put forward projects (i.e. inuman and other social gatherings) and plan on Pilosopo Tasyo, the annual philosophical journal of the Ateneo. What a great honor indeed to be part of the philo family!

2. Lots of time were spent contacting other seminaries, printing t-shirts, and asking Ateneo orgs to perform in our programs. But then, by the end of November, all the efforts were not wasted. The twelve college seminarians of San Jose Seminary, together with their older brothers from the theology, successfully hosted a grand Inter-College Seminary meet of five hundred seminarians. How could anyone be more proud than that? All for God's glory, I say.

1.And of course, the most life-changing moment for me was the time that I got the job as the College Seminary beadle of a turbulent first semester of my senior year. I felt very much honored to lead this small community through the turbulent times, and hard as it might seem, I was able to grow and let others grow. Indeed, I discovered my ability to lead, and at the same time, I learned different attitudes and behavior that have to do with leadership which, I believe, made a better person out of me.

But then, all of this is nothing without the best gift that 2009 brought me, the gift of family and friends. Thank you to everyone for making the recently ended year a great one. As we look forward to 2010, let us altogether hope that things would be better this time around for everyone of us.

RIP The Rev.

2010-01-01T18:58:00.000-08:00

"The Reverend" James Owen Sullivan, drummer of the band Avenged Sevenfold (A7X), was found dead last December 28, 2009.

The Palawan Adventure

2010-01-01T17:27:00.000-08:00

Too cut it short, just a glimpse of what we have done for the past week. And we go through it day by day.

DAY 1 - 25th of December

Left Manila at around 2:30pm.

Arrived in Puerto Princesa Airport at about 4:30 in the afternoon (with a bit of a turbulent landing out there), and then straight to De Loro to fix our things in our rooms.

We spent the night at Kinabuchs Restaurant and ate a few servings of live wormwood (tamilok). In spite of the pungent smell ('cause we forgot to add vinegar), it was tasty, and you can feel pure protein rushing through your throat, alongside some stuff that the poor little creature digested inside it.

DAY 2

Woke up and had breakfast pretty early, just in time for our first trip.

We were able to go to three out of seven islands of Honda Bay, stopping by from one to another to swim, snorkel, and find beautiful fish.

Dinner was served at KaLui, and it was then that I was able to get a taste of Experience Entrepreneurship. The theme of the restaurant is so native and local, and we even have to take our shoes off to enter the kubo and take a seat in the very low table. Among all the foods we ordered, we really enjoyed sinigang ni kaka, made up of bangus belly, shrimp, and soup mixed with coconut juice. Everyone went home really really full.

DAY 3

Sunday was the usual rest day for us. However, during the evening we went to mass at the Immaculate Conception Cathedral of Puerto Princesa, and took the time off to walk around the city proper. I never thought that in the local tiangge almost everything runs cheap. They'd sell pants and shorts for as low as fifty bucks apiece. Because there's no such thing as a fifty-peso curdoroy shorts, I bought a pair for myself before going home to rest.

DAY 4

Underground River time. We took a two-hour trip to Sabang,swam a bit in the bay, and set off for the other side of the island, to get to the Underground River.

Perhaps in my whole life, this has been the greatest miracle of nature that I have witnessed. We were able to witness 1.5 of almost 10 kilometers of the underground cave, and there were a lot of stalactite formations resembling different figures, from the simple bacon to the "cathedral," the cave's highest point. Undortunately, we were not allowed to go any further beyond 1.5Km, so we went back with loads of pictures and video clips of this huge thing.

We went home as we rode with the waves and the rough road back to our Inn.

DAY 5 and 6

This was considered our rest day, for us to work on some school requirements and help mom out with her dissertation. We stayed in our rooms to sleep and fix our things, going out every now and then to take some trips in the city and explore the hidden places of Puerto Princesa, away from the prying eyes of the foreign tourists and the rest who only want to see the main attractions. We ate at almost any place we can see, from the most simple panciteria to the expensive Nicnocs. We also went around and see how city life has gone in Puerto Princesa, and we were more surprised by the fact that the busiest resorts pay for less than a thousand bucks for their water and electricity, and beach land parcels were sold at a hundred per square meter. Hmmm, I'm thinking of buying for my family a small rest house around here.

DAY 7 - December 31, 2009 - the last day of the second-to-the-last year of the MY decade

We strolled around Palawan's very own Baywalk and had photos alongside the giant Christmas tree. Too bad my parents opted not to go out during that night to watch the program and fireworks at the Baywalk, so we would just stay at the Resort and join in their New Year celebration.

Merienda was spent at one of the Vietnamese restaurants alongside the highway. I ate one whole bowl of Vietnamese rice noodle soup (Chaolong). Worth it, but a little heavy on the stomach, I should say.

Though my brothers just wished to have our new year at home, I did not even think of it. Actually, going to a new year party without anything much to worry about back home seems to me a good idea. We've got everything: us being together as a family, the fireworks, the booze, the videoke, the food, and everything's all right. Yes, this was the first time that we celebrated the new year without the comfort of home, but everything was worth it.

DAY 8
Woke up quite late because of all the festivities in the inn. I spent the day preparing for our trip home, and we left at about five in the afternoon.

Trip to Palawan is 9 out of 10. I wonder what the next would be -- What, mom? Kuala Lumpur? After my graduation? Sure!

The Family Holidays

2010-01-01T17:04:00.000-08:00

Christmas with the family is relatively spontaneous; however, my mom and I already have things in mind since October, considering everyone's schedule. Sometimes, things turned out as they were planned, and most of the time, they aren't.

But for this year, it's definitely one good planned Christmas: We're leaving for a trip.

Ever since October, my mom and I, together with my dad, already fished for abroad trips where the family might go: Kuala Lumpur, Macau, and other places. However, we found out that almost all of these were fully booked. Finally, we finally saw the 1-week Palawan trip complete with a house and an itinerary of all the places we will go. Oh yes, Christmas at its best for those who travel a lot like me and my mom.

Consider that an equalizer to all the past three years of celebrating Christmas along SLEX, on our road to Batangas after my Christmas Eve service. Since I served for the Cardinal during the holidays,we would stop over at Starbucks, buy some coffee and treats, eat while telling stories, and then go home, rest, and prepare for Christmas food as we wake up.

Now would be a different case. Possibly, we would eat a sumptuous meal and then prepare for our afternoon flight, and we will be back on the 1st of January 2010.

[From this part on, I write after arriving at Palawan and settling down at an inn.]

Setting all the grand Christmas plans aside, I would like to talk about the little things for Christmas, which appeared to be even more expensive than this one.

First off, we have the Valdez Brothers Christmas wish list. I didn't have anything specific to ask for this year, since I just need the moolah from my aguinaldo.However, Allan, my youngest brother, just asked for a pair of Nike SBs, and I promised to buy him in his birthday come February. Aaron, on the other hand, didn't ask for anything specific, but he did suggest that he expects something not just for Christmas, but also for his birthday.

For my parents, it has always been a different case. Though my mom just wanted us to give our efforts in our studies and work as a Christmas present for her, we gave her brand new pink Crocs for women. Even though she didn't quite like the color and the size is half-inch larger, she gladly accepted it (though my thrifty self could have subscribed to what mom wanted initially). For dad, we just bought him loads of stuff from Divisoria (well, sorry we had to refuse his request of branded goods. He already had too much of it).

And food? A lot would suffice. After the Manila Cathedral mass, we just feasted on three-layered choco mousse, pasta, ham, and chicken nuggets, while watching Van Wilder on Studio 23.

Nothing much here but spend the night with food and treats. Next day was more of preparation day for the family trip.

Up next, my Christmas sentiments and my Palawan trip.

Fifteen Seconds of Internet Time

2009-12-28T05:15:00.000-08:00

My sollipsistic blog, bear with me.

I swear I'll post stuff as soon as I get back home.

My Pre-Christmas Weekend

2009-12-23T20:23:00.000-08:00

As if the synthesis paper was THAT hard. Oh, yeah, I remembered that it ate most of our time and energy, and we nearly did not have any chance of playing Call of Duty 4 and Left4Dead 2 extensively.

So food and alcohol became our solutions.

After the submission of our synthesis papers, the senior Philosophy block had a short ritual of exchanging gifts, and we San Jose seminarians trotted off to prepare for our Christmas caroling at some congressman's house.

After earning 10k for 4 simple songs, we headed straight to Cannan Bistro to join the Philo family for our inuman and year-ender. It was a happy moment for all of us, as we were able to share stories and joke around holding bottles of bear and Kate's weird ashtray (which I wouldn't dare describe in this blog). Heck, the Bistro was so full of happy noise and interesting stories, that we even reached up until 1:30 in the morning before going home.

But this was all preparation for another big day. Come Saturday night, we headed to Merville and into Kate's house, for her birthday treat. Greens, Lights, Tequila, and getting home wasted was all there is for us. Ah, what a way to end the year!

[I wouldn't want to divulge a few details here. Just ask my blockmates as to what exactlyhappened during that night, most especially when I left together with Walt, Marie, and Agno.]

My Sunday was reserved for rest. But then, my mom called and asked me to go home to Batangas and join the whole family in celebrating the Christmas with a party. As usual, we've had lots of food [meaning I would soon get fat after all the munching I have done for the past three days], games, and gifts for everyone. I myself got board shorts that I need for my coming Palawan trip.

I got back home the next day after I got my license card at LTO. Monday was my real rest period as I used up all the time for sleeping and catching up for studies.

All to prepare for the peak of all celebrations outside family. After passing by San Jose Seminary to just get some things needed for our Palawan trip (beach things, of course), I went up to one of my classmate's house in Commonwealth to join my classmates from Guadalupe Minor Seminary, for some food and vices.

However, at about six in the evening, I had to leave and take the bus to Sucat, Paranaque, fo r a big Christmas night composed of shisha, vodka, and Playstation 3. Justin and his bro, Amanda, Mike, and Kate came over to Mykee's house for our little post-Christmas work gathering. Basically, we spent the whole night eating, a few nasty things to begin with, UFC, Tekken, and Guitar Hero World Tour, and telling stories of our nearly ending college days, starting from square one up to the present. Oh, and don't forget the debates on "grand gestures" and the usefulness of philosophy, reaching up to 4:00am.

We boys woke up at around 11am and had our brunch, followed by more Tekken and UFC. Unfortunately, the meeting has to be adjourned and we have to go, and Michael and I had one hell of an adventure trying to ride the jeep from South Bay to Sucat, crossing the street and taking the jeep from Sucat to Baclaran, and then parting ways when I rode the FX to Lawton on the way home. As soon as I arrived, I took a bath and prepared myself for the "last" hurrah.

The Manila seminarians had a Christmas audience with the Cardinal, and besides the very great message on the return of "Christ" in Christmas, another session of great Arzobisopado -served food coupled with stories and our "Christmas aguinaldo."All of us went home together satisfied and prepared to celebrate Christmas in the grandest yet simplest way possible, bearing the true message of Christmas.

The way I told the story of my near-Christmas weekend seemed to be pretty messed up. But then, my point here is to show that Christmas is about having fun and being happy with how things are going. I myself have a lot of work to do, but I had to just set them aside and enjoy the moments while they last [I promise, though, that I will do them after Christmas]. After all, the kings and the shepherds just enjoyed their moment with the child Jesus.

Merry Christmas, everyone!

RIP Brittany Murphy

2009-12-21T07:11:00.000-08:00

Another loss for us.

November 10, 1977 – December 20, 2009

One For The Fracture, Two For The Win

2009-12-16T21:15:00.000-08:00

Kobe Bryant, playing with a fractured finger.

Incredible, isn't he?

On-the-spot: Collaborations of '09

2009-12-13T20:48:00.001-08:00

I had time to take a look at buzznet.com, and I came up with this article about the best collaborations of 2009. Let me breeze through some of them and see if it was really worth it.

1. Boys Like Girls and Taylor Swift - Two Is Better Than One (from the album "Love Drunk."

Yes, Taylor Swift is beautiful, and yes, she can do a good job being with Boys Like Girls. Apprarently, I think it is obvious that Tay can sing almost anything - be it rock, pop, or RnB (hint: Thug Story). BLG sounds like whiny little boys, but they could pull off the trick quite well with good drumbeats and guitar riffs. It would be interesting to see more of this partnership in the future. Tay, pick up the phone and start recording your parts for the next album!

2. Cobra Starship and Leighton Meester - Good Girls Go Bad (from the album "Hot Mess")

Talk about the cover girl and the hip boy being together. I just learned (and watched in YouTube) that Leighton singing live really sucks (but then it was "Somebody to Love"). But admit it, she and Gabe Saporta appear great in the video. In the music? Nearly perfect. Just get Leighton a few more voice lessons and training programs in live perfs. You wouldn't want to spoil a Cobra concert just because of that hot little girl who doesn't know to make her move in the stage.

3. Pete Yorn and Scarlett Johansson - Album "Break Up"

Uh huh, Scarlett can sing well. In fact, she did it too well with Pete Yorn around. This is definitely one of my "easy music" albums to date.

4. Lady GaGa and Beyonce - Telephone (from the album "The Fame Monster")

Sexy dancers in sexy outfits: check. Superb performances which could go together in world tours: check. And of course, the voices: triple check. "Telephone" is a must-have in your music player, and don't you dare delete it.

5. Jay-Z and Alicia Keys - The Empire State of Mind (from the album "The Blueprint: 3")

First the girl worked with Usher, and they made a great "Boo" partnership. Jay-Z had it with everyone else. Now, adjustments for both were, I think, managed easily. Any future projects for them is not a problem. And check out A.K.'s Part II of Empire State of mind.

6. Forever The Sickest Kids and Selena Gomez - Whoa Oh! Remix (the original could be found on the album "Underdog Alma Mater")

FTSK has been one of the best powerpop bands to date, and Selena Gomez is the worst Disney singer to date. Even though Whoa Oh! is great in itself, I just have to give the middle thumb to them.

And I would like to add this new collab I found out when I checked out my newly downloaded music stuff:

***

We The Kings and Demi Lovato - We'll Be The Dream (from the album "Smile Kid")

Yep, both are getting better and better. Besides the fact that Demi Lovato gets more beautiful as she grows (minus the fugly mouth), she actually has POWERPOP talent, and I mean it (well, not like the other Disney girl that wasn't mentioned in this blog post who remained Partying In The USA). We The Kings, on the other hand, have been emerging with great fame in the powerpop scene. Indeed, there is a future.

Mupptes and Queen

2009-12-13T18:08:00.001-08:00

What I once loved when I was a kid, added with the music I could have loved had I been a little bit older. Great combination.

My Lucky Batch

2009-12-12T01:16:00.000-08:00

I have all my own "celebrations" as I went through my school days, and it is not personal, but institutional.

Back in the days when I had my grade school in San Beda College, I was part of the community that celebrated its centennial (1901-2001). Yes, those were the days of serious fighting, Half-life and Conterstrike, math and science clubs, rallies in Mendiola that cause class suspensions, uncaught porn that went as early as grade five, basketball on school uniforms, looking at young women from the Law School without ever thinking that they wouldn't start relationships,and the list goes on and on an on. Also, these were the days when I grew up under the guidance of the moderately conservative Benedictines, most especially with Fr. Anscar Chupungco, OSB, who was my rector. But more importantly, as part of the Grade School community, I was able to take part in the centennial celebrations. As far as I can remember, The Little Bedan staff, under the headship of Gabe Baleos (who is also one of my friends here in Ateneo) with myself as the Assistant EIC, covered in our most "grade school" way possible, the different events of the celebration. In the end, our batch were deemed as the 100th who graduated in San Beda. Somehow, I felt quite sad that SBCGS had to be transferred somewhere. I wish it had just retained the Manila campus.

Anyway, moving on, in hopes of trying to find a new life which could fit, I transferred to the Our Lady of Guadalupe Minor Seminary, under the care of the diocesan priests of the Archdiocese of Manila. During my senior year in high school, we celebrated its Golden Anniversary, and again, I played a big part in its celebration. As co-head of the Academic Committee (with Paul Bansil), and the chief of the Publications Committee who spearheaded the 50th Anniversary Souvenir Program, a collection of messages, testimonies, and other memorabilia which witnessed to the growth and development of this institution dedicated to the formation of young men in the service of the Church. And of course, I proudly say that I led this class who celebrated this historical event, the class who could truly say "Laking Guadalupe, Maipagmamalaki!"

[By the way, as I write this, we celebrate the feast of Our Lady of Guadalupe]

And now, as part of the formation of San Jose Major Seminary, I have to be part of the Ateneo de Manila University Loyola Schools community, and I have been part of yet another historic event. Just a few hours ago, I attended the celebration of the Eucharist to thank the Lord and Our Mother for the Ateneo's 150 years of existence. Though I did not have a big role this time, I was there to celebrate with the community (but then, I thought, it was during the 150th year of the Ateneo that I It was then that I realized that I was really lucky in my school life to have celebrated three grand celebrations in different schools, and I could say that I was part of it.

Intermission Number: Let's Give It Up For The Five

2009-12-10T05:24:00.000-08:00

hell yeah.